Knackered working full time...

[minko]

Is it just me? I've been doing 5 days a week for the past 6 months and I feel wrecked. I get 20 days hols. I asked my company if I could have an extra 5 days unpaid leave to help towards cost - and guilt - of kids (aged 5 and 9) in childcare all through their holidays and I heard it had been turned down on Friday.

It has just knocked me even further down. My husband works v. long hours and all the domestic stuff and childcare is down to me. My only choice is to give up my job if I don't like it but I really like the job I do.

I'm just feeling a bit soppy and need some sympathy really. Not looking forward to work tomorrow...

Sorry to hear you are feeling pooped - I am not surprised with all that on your plate. What do u do? Can you work part time instead doing this job or something similar?

I would love to work part time, say 3 days a week, but jobs in my field are few and far between out in the sticks where we live. I rushed out to get a job as soon as my youngest started school and was delighted to find something I really enjoy. I'm just having trouble actually doing it...

Thanks for the kind words btw!

It's really hard, but have you prioritised ruthlessly what you really need to do, between what is desirable and what mandatory? Ironing is optional, imv, whereas cleaning the bath mandatory.

And check your vitamin d, b, and iron levels. They could be affecting your energy. Also sleep, none of us gets enough.

Train the children to put their cups etc away, lay the table, polish the shoes, and for the older one, make the sandwiches for school and make the bed in the morning. Also putting their clothes sorted between dark and white in the laundry basket. Your future in laws will bless you. A wash a day helps control things. If you can afford it, a dishwasher is a blessing. So is a slow cooker. Make a large stew and freeze half.

And again if you can afford it, order the big shop online and get it delivered. The delivery charge will probably be more than offset by the spontaneous purchases you don't make.

This isn't meant to sound as smug as it does. Going back to work, full time, takes time to get used to. But a for if what I've written I worked out over 8 year if serious illness in the family when I had to work.

Hth.

Aren't you entitled to more annual leave than that? See here www.direct.gov.uk/en/employment/employees/timeoffandholidays/dg_10029788

Swedish,
Unfortunately those 28 days include the 8 bank holidays.

However, minko, it looks like you should be entitled to take parental leave
Parental Leave

You have my sympathies, I'm knackered too but DH stays home, so can't imagine all the domestic stuff being down to me. In fact I just wouldn't be able to cope. DS would turn feral.

Where I work you can buy extra annual leave.
Could you look into that maybe?
I've just gone back full-time and I'm finding it hard going, you have my every sympathy.

Ah, Process, hadn't noticed. Bummer OP. sorry.

Not a solution to the actual problem but have you thought about getting a cleaner? I'm going back to work full time end of July and I know that my life will be work, baby, cleaning, housework and....fall asleep. I've already said to DH that if things get too much then I'd like to get a cleaner so that we can both maximise our time with DD.

Thanks for all the practical advice. I feel a bit pathetic now as I already have a cleaner and a dishwasher!

I think what worries me most is guilt about whether I'm doing the right thing for my kids. We could afford for me not to work but I need my work for my own self respect etc. So I feel I am being selfish working. But really they are in after school care for about an hour and a half every night... that's not too bad is it?? And holiday clubs are supposed to be fun aren't they?? My in laws help out now and again but they live 200 miles away and not having lived in our area long I don't have a lot of other contacts to rely on.

Obviously working less days would be the solution but it's not an option for the time being and I want to hang on here for at least a year for the sake of my CV...

You could work less days but you'll find either... a) You do five days work in four for 80% pay or b) You get a proper little part time job with no prospects and minimum wage pay.

It's a tough one and it seems there is no middle ground. You need to do whatever makes you happiest and from what you have said I don't think either solution (working or staying at home) will be perfect. You just need to choose the lesser of two evils!

Guilt afflicts us all, sahms too. Exhaustion however is to be expected in going into a new job with a new employer after a break. It will get a bit better, I've read somewhere that at least 30 % of the time at work you are on autopilot and you know the post and the employer. When new or newish you don't have that. Let alone the added complication of children.

I'm knackered too.

DH is away, and I'm trying to force myself to go downstairs to do the washing up.

Good luck OP. Check out your employment rights and make sure that you're getting 'em.

It's bloody exhausting like a rollercoaster that doesn't stop. Counting down to the weekend then the weekend flys past without hardly a breather. I've been doing it for nearly 18 months, I love my job though wouldn't want to give it up. Currently counting down to Mat leave, looking forward to it far too much!! I'll be asking to return 3 days a week though as I definitely don't want to return full time and I know I can do my job in 3 days.

I'm sympathise, I've been back to work full time in a highly stressful job for 6 months, I'm a lone parent ( my DH left 18 months ago ) my house looks like a squat, im shattered all the time, I work Mon-Fri feel l

Sorry big thumbs and a touch phone never work out .. Cont-. I feel dead on Saturday, I feel better on Sunday then back to work on Monday. I feel guilty because my 10 yr old wants to go out in the evenings to the forest, bike rides and tbh I would rather poke my eyes out with a rusty fork than move off the sofa