Harassment investigational hearing - do's and don'ts?

[AKMD]

I recently made a complaint of harassment at work against my manager. Tomorrow I have an investigational hearing with HR. Present will be 2 HR bods and me. MNers have already knocked into me that HR are not my friends and their job is to protect the interests of the company, not me. Is there anything else I should bear in mind or any definite do's and don'ts? Any questions I should ask?

I would have a colleague come with me but as I'm signed off sick due to work-related stress the hearing is taking place at home. I don't want to look like an idiot by having my mum there or something :)

If possible have someone there to take notes for you. Even a friend or mam. It could turn out to be important later on in the process. Good luck!

oh yes definitely have someone else there with you. My experience of dealing with this was that HR tried to minimise what happened, have you a friend who could sit in whom you trust? good luck.

I think it would be helpful to have your own note-taker there, and whether this is your mum or a friend is irrelevant. You need to make sure that your recollection of anything said or agreed at the meeting is widely accepted, and if this can be corroborated by your 'helper' then so much the better.

In fact, after the meeting, write down your own recollection as soon as you can, and keep it safe with your mum/friend's account. HR should send you their own minutes of the meeting for you to agree as soon as possible. Read them very carefully.

Have a short list of things you know you absolutely want to say during the meeting, and make sure you say them, and make sure your helper notes down that you have said them!

Best of luck. Must be stressful. I really hope it goes well for you.

You should take someone with you, preferably your union rep.

Check with HR who you are allowed to have. If the meeting was in work you wouldn't be allowed to bring a family member but a colleague or union rep is fine and they could still attend at your home. You have a statutory right to be accompanied. See here for details www.acas.org.uk/index.aspx?articleid=2178

Argh ok, will try to find someone who can make it tomorrow. I doubt it will be a work colleague at this point but I'll try.

What should I wear? Home smart casual or work gear?

You don't have to say they're your mum just say "this is X, my note taker".

Good point. I do look rather like her though! I'll make a few calls this evening and see which poor soul I can rope into doing it.

I have accompanied a friend to a work pre-hearing meeting and was simply introduced as, 'LineRunner, who is here to support me, and take notes,'

Thanks LineRunner. I've roped in my oldest friend to take notes and that gives me a bit more confidence that they won' refuse to do the meeting with her there. DH says to record the whole thing on a dictaphone but I think that might be crossing a line somewhere.

Recording is fraught with difficulties. I appreciate that others have posted that HR are not your friend but that doesn't make them your enemy either. I have lost count of the number of times people start their meetings with me all guns blazing and are then wrongfooted when I am all reasonable and helpful. I work in HR - so answer questions honestly and as fully as possible.

That's what I thought Llareggub. Having someone to take notes is one thing but recording the meeting seems a bit aggressive to me. It's obviously in my interest to keep HR on-side as much as possible (they are only human too!) and I don't want to get their backs up.

Thanks all. The meeting went fairly well I think.

AKMD, Glad to hear that. Must be a relief to get that over with.

Do you now have to agree HR's record of the meeting?

They are going to type it up and send to me for review. I'll check it against the notes my lovely friend made before making any comments on it.

I've been signed off for another week :( I called HR this morning to ask about how they are going to implement the separation part of their policy and they hadn't made any plans to do so so the Dr agreed with me that it would just be going back to the same situation that made me ill in the first place and I should stay at home until it changes. What a pain.