Want to return to work to feel more like myself but do what?

[lizardqueenie]

I am currently at home FT with my DD who is 16 months old, following my maternity leave I took a voluntary redundancy from my civil service job. At the time (and still now) it felt like the right decision, I wasn't very happy in my job but had got into a fairly senior position and had worked my way up after university.

I am enjoying having time at home with my DD which was one of the reasons that i took VR, and I've been able to pay off all my debts which would have taken a long long time otherwise. I am lucky that at the moment DH' s job is secure and fairly well paid, and he manages all the big bills, mortgage etc out of his salary.

I am really starting to feel that I do need to do something else, maybe 2 or 3 days a week. I still have a good chunk of my VR payment in the bank and don't really want to burn through that, its a good nest egg. Also I have got DD a place for nursery 2 days a week from when she is about 20 months so at the end of the summer and my mum has offered to care for her 1 day a week. Im just starting to feel I've lost myself a bit, all i do is clean, tidy and focus on DD. It sounds awful, its not that I don't want to focus on her but I just want to have a more rounded life.

I've kept my eye out for jobs locally, in schools, offices etc just to see what is around. I am really struggling to decide if I want to do a job that is a new career or something that is just work and i can leave at the door. I can see the positives & negatives of both.

Going forward I think it would be ideal to find something that does fit in with the school term, so perhaps working in a school in an admin role would be the way to go but as we are not bound by school hold at the moment, i wonder if thats something I should look for in a couple of years time as we'd also like to have another baby at some point.

Sorry this post is getting long, but has anyone else been in a similar position or have any ideas of where i could look for work? or what kinds of things I could do? I've been glued to womenlikeus.co.uk and similar websites but I do wonder what happens with the fact that I have been at home for nearly 1.5 years?

My experience is quite varied as have my civil service roles been but it includes casework, advocacy, management of a small team, giving legal advice, and a lot of data and information analysis.

Thank you

1.5 years is not a really long time out of the job market, although things are quite tough out there at the moment.

If I were in your position I would just start by applying for a few things you fancy and see what you get and if that might fit the bill. You'll find that better paid/more professional type jobs are generally full time, but you can always negotiate at interview. Or you could do some maternity cover to see if that is the sort of company/environment/job you would like - same for temping, although the latter is not always that well paid.

Not sure if I've helped, that's just what I would do - unless you have something in mind you would like to retrain in?

thanks for replying itsonlyyearfour interesting name!

I think I would like a professional job in some aspects but I am not sure exactly doing what. I am not really that interested in management though, I enjoy doing my own work more than managing other people but I do like working with people/ the public for my sins!

I have thought about retraining and at least I do have some money behind me to train, something like chiropody does appeal to me, there is an opportunity to learn more & study, it would be a vocation as opposed to just fiddling about with different jobs and I like the idea of visiting different people in their homes. The downside is that it is a 3 year degree course. Although, and again this is part of the reason why I am confused about what to do, maybe if we are thinking of having another baby, then spending some time studying to have a career at the end of it might not be a bad option.

Ive been mulling it over all day (and for longer than that) and I do feel quite guilty about now deciding that I don't want to stay at home full time. I wonder if others who decided to be at home full time, later changed their minds as their children got older/ circumstances changed?

I worked from home for 8 years then went back to work when my youngest started infant school. a couple of years later I took vr and applied to uni to train for a new career.

I'm loving it and have no regrets, even as a LP! It's def good to have a plan for the longer trrm, IMO. Chiropody sounds like a good option for you:)

Thanks VitaminC thats very encouraging. :)

If I may can I ask how did you manage juggling studying/ childcare/ everything else?

Erm, I just try to juggle everything as best I can!

The advantage of being a single mum is that I can live at my own pace! I discovered that I'm pretty much useless in the evenings and can't learn, so I prefer to go to bed around the same time as the kids (usually in bed by 9pm), but get up very early in the morning (5am) to study before the kids get up at 7!

I make myself stick to "office hours", so I try to stay out of the house during the day and study in the library when I'm not in lectures or clinicals. My kids stay to an after-school homework club and I collect them at 5.30pm. After that it's all about them (activities, bathtime, dinnertime...) until bedtime.

Shopping is done online/at the market on Sunday mornings. I try to do a load of washing overnight every night, then throw it in the drier in the morning and fold it whilst the dinner's cooking in the evening. The kids tidy their bedroom and earn TV time (1/4h tidying = 1/4h TV). We get clothes ready the night before to make mornings easier...

I guess having a routine that works is the key :)