Advice please on dealing with a toxic co-worker

[futterbingers]

I work in a small section in a large organisation. For the past 3 years I have been the supervisor of a toxic, obnoxious person. I have always thought I handled her well but today she really p*ssed me off. she has always reminded me and anyone who'll listen that she "taught me everything I know" which is true. As a result she thinks SHE runs the section. She asks me who was calling every time i get a phonecall, and what did they want. today she told me what to tell our boss and would not listen to me when I said I was well capable of dealing with him. Because there were other people in the office - and I admit because I'm not assertive enough - I feel that I let her get away with bullying me. Later when she was passing behind me she stopped to read the email I was composing. I have decided to take her aside tomorrow and make it plain to her that I am her boss not vice versa. Btw, when I say she is toxic, she behaved the same way with her previous supervisor, and unofficially I've been told that she cant be transferred as no other dept will have her. She is a glass half empty person with knobs on. She hasnt a good word to say about anyone and moans constantly, about the job, other staff, everything. would anyone have any suggestions as to how to tell her to back off, without coming across as a bully myself? I should add that she has a lot of illnesses and conditions including depression and attempted suicide in the past. TIA

I sympathise, I manage someone very similar and it is very hard to keep your authority when they actively undermine it all the time.
I think you are doing the right thing to take her to one side and I would say something like 'I appreciate your experience and input into the team but I am the manager and it is in appropriate for you continually challenge how I conduct teh running of team'. I would also tell her that you are happy to hear any concerns or ideas she has but they need to be conducted in the appropriate forum and you can always meet with her privately when she has a problem.

This way you are still letting her have her say when necessary but hopefully stopping her fro sniping at you all day. Then when she over steps the mark again you can gently remind her that it isn't the time but she can have 10 minutes with you at the end of the day to highlight her concerns if necessary.

Advice gained through bitter experience: stop trying to alter the behaviour of a toxic person. They will never be got rid of, no matter what you do. Protect yourself and look for a sideways move for you, not her. Leave her behind. Too much stress otherwise. Let her be someone else's problem and move on. Good luck.

Thank you so much for your advice; I was very stressed last night thinking about the situation but I took your advice Gamerwidow, I told her how much I appreciated her input etc., and then said that after work when I reflected back, that I had felt bullied. (I felt that it was important that I used the "b" word, as she would be very quick to accuse someone else of bullying her). In fairness, she did apologise, and it was all quite non-confrontational; mainly due to me buttering her up and saying that I knew she hadn't meant to come across that way (ha!). Pharmgirl, you are exactly right, she is in that particular job for the past 12 years, so of course she does know it inside out, but that means she thinks she "owns" the job, iykwim. As you say, I need to protect myself. And upper management only see one side of her, the carefully cultivated image of a helpful, efficient worker. Those of us who actually work with her see such a nasty person, its pathetic really. Many thanks again for your support.