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Made to feel awful on second day back at work

20 replies

weakestlink · 05/02/2012 21:39

Today was my second day back at work following 1 year ML and 7 weeks holiday added on so I've been off quite a while.

When I left my hours were mainly given to a new colleague to make up her hours to full time (I work 18 hrs). Another person was also recruited during the summer for 2 days a week as it was busy.

When I left I informed my employer that I would be coming back on 01/02/2012 so this was never in question. I had a battle back in November when my employer tried to reduce my hours but this was sorted and I arrived back on 1st as agreed.

Today the colleague that my hours were given to whilst I was on ML has made me feel awful for coming back.

She ignored me and was shirty with me for the first 2 hours until I asked her if I had done something to offend her.

She basically said that she thought I was totally out of order going above my line managers head to get my job back (I had no choice) and that everything was perfect and I've ruined it for the whole team.

She actually asked me what I am doing here as "I am rich" she said she was not willing to drop even 1 shift per week as she has credit card debts to pay due to a holiday abroad she needed to pay off.

She works 6 shifts per week, I work 3. The other 3 team members work 2 or 3 shifts per week.

She said although I am "entitled to my job back" that she thinks I am wrong for pushing for it when others will suffer.

Both this colleague and the 2 day-er were taken on on a permanent basis ie. Not maternity cover which I can't fathom but that's not my decision....

I feel awful and am dreading tomorrow as there is clearly no place for me in the team anymore.

I have it in writing from my boss that I can return on XYZ days as per my old shift pattern. I have worked here for 5 years (the second longest out of the team of 5).

OP posts:
flowery · 05/02/2012 21:43

Why do you think there is 'clearly no place in the team' for you any more just because one silly colleague has got a strop on?

Can you just have a word with her and say she's made her views known, but you are entitled to your job back which your boss is fully supportive of, and you are keen to work well with everyone as part of the team going forward, so if she could keep those views to herself from now on you'd be grateful.

something like that?

Bossybritches22 · 05/02/2012 21:48

Ask your boss to haved an informal meeting with both of you to work out a way forward.

Acknowledge she has a grievance, but that it isn't down to you what happens to ML cover and that you BOTH need to find a working compromise for the good fo the team.

She can say "I won't drop a shift" as much as she likes but if that's what the boss needs to do now you're back she just has to put up & shut up!

TopazMortmain · 05/02/2012 21:52

Her financial problems are nothing to do with you Grin - tell her to go boil her head.

weakestlink · 05/02/2012 21:53

Yes you're both right I'm probably not thinking right as I was upset by her comments.

I did tell her if she has a problem with her own employment terms then she should speak to the boss. She said she would not due to fear of being moved to another department (her job title is different to mine and they could prob redeploy her elsewhere). She said she'd be forced to resign if that happened and it would be down to me basically.

I will try to be less emotional about it. I'm 50% upset and 50% furious at her cheek!

OP posts:
suburbophobe · 05/02/2012 21:53

It was her choice to pay for a holiday on credit. What's it got to do with you?

And as for telling you you "don't need the job as you are rich" Hmm

weakestlink · 05/02/2012 21:56

I know. That's why I'm furious. What the he'll is it to her what my family finances are?!

OP posts:
lagrandissima · 05/02/2012 21:57

She sounds manipulative - don't fall for her passive-aggressive nonsense.

Jot down what she has said to you. Ask for an informal meeting with management. They will tell her to wind her neck in - it's not her place to make staffing decisions, one assume? If not, she should be careful what she says, as some might construe that as some type of harassment or constructive dismissal.

weakestlink · 05/02/2012 21:57

HELL not he'll stupid iPhone.

OP posts:
flowery · 05/02/2012 21:57

Try and change that ratio to be nearer 100% furious at her cheek!

weakestlink · 05/02/2012 21:58

Yea she is quite manipulative. She made me promise I wouldn't tell anyone what she had said. She obviously doesn't know me very well Wink!

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ledkr · 05/02/2012 21:59

Ah poor you.I have just gone back after a years mat leave and its bad enough without all that shit. What i have found though is a new confidence to speak up for myself and it works.Let your manager handle it and tell the colleague you clearly cant agree so dont want to discuss it further with her.I will be thinking of you tomorrow.

weakestlink · 05/02/2012 22:01

Thanks everyone. It's a good job I'm not a pushover!

I actually still cannot believe what she said!

OP posts:
Bossybritches22 · 05/02/2012 22:01

OK she needs to get a grip, she is obviously carrying a huge chip on her shoulder.

Maybe you need to mark her card, give her a few more days to chunter & get used to you being back, be sweetness & light. Then if she's still having a hissy, take her to one side and tell her firmly that you will not put up with a bad working atmosphere/ environment it is counterproductive for everyone concerned, and if things don't improve you will have no option but to call a meeting with the HR manager.

Horrid for you when you have just got back to work, keep smiling through gritted teeth!

weakestlink · 05/02/2012 22:04

Someone else at work has told me her card is already marked... the boss had words with her on an unrelated issue only a few days ago...

We only cross paths once a week thank the lord, I just hope the other team members have not been swayed by her nasty comments...

OP posts:
weakestlink · 05/02/2012 22:06

Words just totally fail me as to why they did take these people on for
Maternity Leave cover when I assured them I would be back.

OP posts:
weakestlink · 05/02/2012 22:06

*did NOT

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lagrandissima · 05/02/2012 22:08

I wouldn't wait around and be nice for a week. If she's a bully, fight fire with fire. Talk to your boss, provide a written record of what your colleague said (write it tonight, whilst it is fresh in your head), and get it sorted tomorrow. Let us know how it goes!

weakestlink · 05/02/2012 22:12

The thing I can't understand is she knew u was coming back and she knew she only got more hours because I left so what did she think was going to happen?!? Also she has double the hours everyone else has.

Sorry this is quite rant-y now.

OP posts:
weakestlink · 05/02/2012 22:15

I could just send an email to my boss saying something like "I was very upset today when... Blah blah blah" or I would prob be best to see what she does next.

Perhaps she thought I might just say ok and get my coat?!

OP posts:
TopazMortmain · 05/02/2012 22:54

I would do nothing as she is clearly just whining... Ignore her

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