maternity leave is too long ?

[lorcana]

• I manage a team of around 30 people - currently 4 are either on mat leave or about to go. All plan to have year off- this is too long imo. I had 5 children and took between 4 weeks and 3 months for each - staff come back deskilled demotivated and completely out of tHe loop. The impact on career and team is enormous - why do people take such long mat leaves ?

Well, good for you Lorcana.

Shame spelling and typing weren't included in your training

I've been back 3 days after 1 year off.

I've resuscitated an attempted hanging.
I've diagnosed many different illness / pathologies.
I have been more patient and more confident post mat leave than I was before I had children.

I think my maternity leave has meant I have returned to work a more rounded individual. I am also throwing myself into work whole heartedly. If I'd have returned after 4 months I would have been a zombie - and potentially dangerous.

hmmm I would question you as to why you chose to take such a short amount of leave ? I think woman have fought for a choice and woman like you just make life harder.
your comments that woman will never be the same as men is true- they can't have babies but you think we that is to our detriment.
If you have daughters I pity them.

Well done you - is that what you need to hear? to justify the selfish decisions you have made.

Maybe instead of women "seeking parity with men" they should be seeking parity with us?

I didn't wear anything but PJs for 4 weeks

Elfontheedge, I completely agree. When I returned to work after 9 months, I was suddenly incapable of doing the same job I'd done previously for 12 years. All because I'd had a baby. It's shit managers who consign maternity returners to the shit-est of jobs, simply because of their own misguided, baseless assumptions about a person's ability after a period of absence like maternity leave. It took me just over a week to get used to the systems again, and then another six months fighting to get my old job back. I was never incapable of doing my old job, but my managers (with the exception of one) were incapable of seeing past their own blinkered view of what I was capable of. It still rankles with me that it took them six fecking months to realise that I'd just had a baby, not a lobotomy when off.

Have a op.

C'mon people, hands up who thinks Lorcana is actually a woman, and not a hairy handed trucker researcher from The Wright Stuff for Mondays edition called Dave who made his wife go back to double shifts after each nirth?

Birth. Even.

Need to correct myself after above posts....

Please don't insult Xenia by suggesting that the OP is her with a name change. Xenia is an intelligent woman, whereas the OP is crass and ignorant.

OP - welcome to Mumsnet. I wonder why you chose to start with such a provocative first post?

BIWI, very true. Xenia would never start a thread like this.

"most expensive types of professional training" obviously it isn't in education, otherwise it would have included SPELLING (btw trainee EPs do a mere four years undergrad to become teachers and three yr doctorate, we know Nuffink but can spell )

Lorcana,

I am a woman working full-time in a very high profile and public industry doing a stressful job. I took 9 months off (using one KIT per month) and within a few months of returning was promoted to take on the top job of its type in my business.

Would I be doing better for my employer or career if I had taken less time off? No. It took six months for the physio to sign me off after my birth. I was also breastfeeding virtual constantly for around seven months. While I kept up bf at night to 16mo, I did not have time to express. My child refused a bottle at daycare and only drunk at night - fine for a 9 month old but impossible for a younger baby.

So I returned when I felt that 9 months off had given me time so I felt I had bonded with my child; my readiness to return to work was obvious to my employer and appreciated; and many people have remarked that my time off has given my focus and ability to delegate better than before.

If you wanted to take off less time for your maternity leaves, that's fine. Just like I think it's fine to take a year if you need or want it.

I would suggest that my employer and I have both won in this scenario.

virtually...and me focus.....sorry, tired eyes and fast typing...

What I really wanted to say was Fuck Off, but that wouldn't be polite would it?

There is so, so much more to life than work, and I pity you for not realising that.

Have a and read some proper studies about maternity leave, employee engagement and perhaps the benefits of flexible working.

I suspect if you were a better manager then managing maternity leave wouldn't be so hard.

Are you Sarah Palin?

OP you are so cool and managerial and powerful and awesome and capable with your team of 30. Of course I used to do this too until I took 6 months mat leav and - poof! - my little ole brain just blew right away!

There are special words to describe people who categorise others and generalise millions of individuals on the basis of gender, race or sexual orientation. Twat is one I find applicable in this case.

...and here's my very first .

An understanding employer is essential... surely the answer is staring you in the face.... it is your management skills which need updating to assist these women back into yout workplace.

you are a terrable manager, I returned to work after 15 months off some sick due to pregnacy related issues/heart problems, I went back to work keen as mustard, but scared, within a week or so back to speed this was before the days of keeping in touch offical days?? what are they called BTW? but I used to go in for our quaterly meetings.
I am embarrested to say I think I am actually better at my job since mat leave, it has knocked off my sharp corners and I can see what is important, also I have more empathy with my clients and employers, so I find the fine line I tread easier, so good for you and your 5 children
PS I have reported this post as a troll, sorry :( if you are not but feels like it.

I did not expect to provoke such strong feelings - its an issue I discuss frequently with colleagues ; male/female n long and short leave takers ... Never had such responses. My observations are just that but based on over 20 years in my field.
I do not know what a 'troll' is ? Also forgive spelloing/grammar as combination of typing on blackberry and english 2nd language perhaps ?
I do have strong opinions but on the whole think I am quite well received at work ( and home ! ) I am surprised at all the biscuit giving ... ??

The biscuits are to help you keep up your strength

Valpolicella, is there another medal for me?

I just returned to work after a year off. I kept up to date whilst at home and did a few KIT days when I could persuade my bosses to agree a date. Four weeks after returning (full-time) I had to interview for my own post due to a restructure, and I passed with flying colours. I'm more motivated, have better organisational skills and I have no worries about my career.

Lorcana, is there maybe some other reason for these people to be demotivated?

Far too tempted to say fuck off... but I won't.

It's only a job, dear.

Thank fuck you aren't my boss. Have you ever thought you may be the reason they aren't all rushing back?

And working for the public sector never give your opinion to you colleagues on this matter or I can see a whole lot of Shit about to fall on you.

A couple of years off out of a career of 40 years (or more) is no big shakes. I am always confused by people who think that it is.

People take sabbaticals all the time and no-one has a go at them or says they are throwing their careers away.

On the contrary I have discussed it with colleagues - no reactions like these. Some agree, some don't but on the whole seemed rather uncontentious.
What do people here think about those who chose not to. Return or women who chose not to work at all ?