Mother's Help

[Bugsy]

Looking for some advice please. I am expecting Baby Two next April and it looks as though my husband is going to be working abroad alot next year. While I am on maternity leave, I think I may need some help from 5pm until 8pm every weekday night, as I have no family nearby.
Does anyone have any experience of employing a "mother's help" person? Should I go through an agency, advertise locally. I live in South West London.
Any helpful suggestions, greatfully received.

I have a mother's help. She's here for three days a week, 9 hours a day. It's working out great.. she helps with the boys (3 3/4 and 7 weeks) and cooks us dinner with enough for leftovers. The agency I used was Top Notch Nannies (on the advice of SueW, I think.. thanks!). The agency made it easier on me, but was expensive. It was worth it, though.

A friend of a friend of mine employed someone in the evenings to help with dinner, bath and bed. She put an ad in the Lady (I think).

You might also try putting up a notice on a local nursery's board. There are occasionally ads up on ours for au pairs/babysitters/nannies who have some extra time. Are you anywhere around Fulham? One of my friends just employed a temporary nanny and always seems to know who to call, etc for that kind of thing. If you're close, I'll ask her how she found someone.

Oh, and, of course, check the noticeboard on mumsnet. That's how I found my son's first nanny share.

What exactly does a mother's help do? Is she only around when you are or can you leave the kids with her?

I was wondering the same thing myself! What exactly would he/she do?

Bugsy, is it 'The Lady' or 'Country Life' that contains lots of ads for nannies and domestic help. Have you gone down this route yet?

PS - You can see I know a lot about hired help!

The Lady and Nursery World ( both weekly mags out on a Thursday) are good places to advertise or look for help. Also try -

www.nannyjob.co.uk
www.childminder.com

Try also Families southwest magazine (can be picked up anywhere locally) I think the website is the same - they have loads of ads. I am possibly consodering contacting a local college to offer their students work experience as they are keen to get that looking after your oler child but I dooubt they would do the cooking. Two other agencies to try would be Wimbledon nannies (we got our brilliant nanny through them) and South of the River in Northcote road clapham.

A mother's help helps you do that voodoo that you do so well. He or she will help do whatever it is that the stay at home mother or father does during the day. She doesn't have sole charge of the kids, but can babysit if needed. And coming off the general, here's the specifics of how my mother's help helps me:

She's here on Mon, Tues and Thurs. On Mondays, my almost 4 yo son doesn't have nursery, so we (she, the 4yo, the 7 week old and I) all go on an outing to a museum, indoor playground, etc, together. On Tues and Thurs, she helps me get the elder ready for nursery and will take him to school if needed. Then, while he's at school, she shops and cooks dinner for us. She can pick him up from nursery (he has a half day), if needed and then we all hang out in the afternoon. It makes things much easier for me. She's also babysat for a couple of hours while I took the baby to the doctor and will help me with a party I'm having in a couple of weeks. The one thing she doesn't do is clean. This is particular to us, though. Usually mother's helps will help clean.. with the emphasis on help, I think.

That's about it. Must go, sorry for taking so long, we were out of town this weekend.

Thank you all so much for all your pointers. I'm really just looking for a kindly soul who will help me out while baby two is very small and my husband is out of the country. I think the hours between 5pm & 8pm will be the most difficult because we will all be tired & that is where the help of a partner would be most missed.
I'll let you know how I get on.

But then they will be doing all the things or some of the things some people seem so desperate to want to do themselves!

Bugsy, that sounds a really good idea, especially during those hard hours. A friend of mine found an NNEB student from the local college to help with her 3, three evenings a week, as her husband is away w/e to w/e at the moment.

Its working out brilliantly.