Dreading returning to work in Feb

[mummyhill]

I am on Mat leave at the moment and have to return to work in feb for financial reasons and am dreading it. I do not enjoy the job but at least it means we will keep a roof over our heads and food on the table. It's only a few evenings a week and all day saturday but I really don't want to leave the children. Found it hard enought to return after having dd 4 years ago but it just seems worse now i have 2 children. Any words of advice?

mummyhill, I so dreaded going back to work 1 year after dd was born. Really made the last couple months of my maternity leave very stressful. Arranging the childcare, buying work clothes, negotiating with employer (I had to change roles because I wanted flexible working), building myself up for the emotional wrench of leaving dd, was a nightmare.

But now that I am in the groove, I find my work time precious me-time. Even the commute is great - NOT but yes. Never thought I would be so happy to be away from dd. My work is boring (but I don't hate it). Like you said, it keeps food on the table. I get to go on mn without interruptions - wow!

Well, I appreciate you might still feel the same way after you are back at work. But ... don't write it off yet. Flexible working was key to my sanity and balancing work and family. The time commitment you are giving to work seems very reasonable. I do wish you all the best.

Thank blueshoes. I am going back as a checkout operator so swap noisey irritable but loveable ds who will be 4 months and dd who will be 4 for a bunch of miserable irritable custromers and management who think that the job should be more important to me than my family. I need to change my hours to work roun dh's work but can't see them being very flexible from things they have said to friends and colleagues of mine who have asked to change their hours due to family commitments.

oh, I can see how work might not be a sanctuary from home - quite the opposite. I understand about not wanting to leave your children. Having an unsympathetic employer is really sh*tty. Sorry but I don't know what to say except things could have changed whilst you were on maternity and if not, no job is forever. You should be commended for having the discipline for going back to work despite your reservations - to keep your family going. Your children will understand and appreciate it.

Thanks blueshoes. We are hoping to be able to move house within the next 5 years, when we do I think I will try my hand at childminding instead. Can't do it at the moment it is cramped/difficult enough with just my two in out 2 bed hse.

So there is light at the end of the tunnel! It sounds like you really enjoy children. Childminding would be perfect.

have you asked your employer for flexible working? If you have kids under 6 (which you obv do!), they are legally obliged to consider it, and give you valid reasons if they decline, and they MUST follow a specific procedure. Here's the website about it all...
good luck!

\link{http://www.dti.gov.uk/er/individual/flexible-pl516.htm}

thanks vmcdonald i will look into it. They have been funny with other people I know with children of a similar age to mine with regard to changing shifts though.