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Original poster

8 month old in nursery five days a week

15 replies

LauraMysak · 15/08/2011 19:54

Is it ok for baby if he's in creche five days a week? I don't think my work will allow me to go part time so my 8 month old will need to go into creche for five days a week. I'm worried he will suffer because he's not with parents for such a long time. Can anyone offer any advice?

OP posts:

scurryfunge · 15/08/2011 19:56

Mine did at 6 months, full time until school. No suffering whatsoever. He is secure and knows he is loved.

SenoritaViva · 15/08/2011 19:58

I went back to work when DD was 3 1/2 months old, it was the law in the country we lived in. We had a nanny so not quite the same but now DD is 4 and I am a SAHM. DD has a wonderful relationship with both her father and I. By the way I worked 5 days a week and was often away travelling.

mamalovebird · 15/08/2011 20:02

I had to go back to work when my DS was 7 months and he was nursery 5 days a week. It was really hard and I must admit I worried myself sick but it did him no harm. He is a lively, sociable, happy, confident little boy. I just make sure when I get home, nothing else matters apart from us-time before he goes to bed. Just be confident with your choice of nursery, I was really lucky and had a brilliant nursery with lovely staff who were really caring and understood when I was calling them 5 times a day to check on him.

I eventually got work to agree to reduce my hours slightly but he's still in 4 days and runs to the doors most mornings shouting to go and play with his mates.

And remember, childcare is just that - only you will give him the one on one, undivided, unchanging attention in the middle of the night & at the weekends/holidays. He'll always know who his mummy is.

You do what you have to do. Your baby won't know any different so to him/her it's just normal. Good luck!

mamalovebird · 15/08/2011 20:04

*him, sorry.

Original poster

LauraMysak · 15/08/2011 21:18

Thank you for your responses. You've made me feel a lot better

OP posts:

coccyx · 15/08/2011 21:19

he will spend more time with nursery than his parents, have you mentioned part time hours

LovetheHarp · 16/08/2011 08:29

Hi OP,
what kind of hours will he be doing? Are you able to start early/finish early? Is it a long commute?

gaaagh · 16/08/2011 13:33

We had to do that with DD, around that age. I was worried at first but it turned out fine. After 6 or 7 months DH changed jobs which enabled him to collect her an hour or two earlier several days (normally 2 or 3) so that helped, in fact it helped getting him more involved because we'd done the "DH as breadwinner" thing for so long it was starting to get silly (him knowing nthing about where DCs stuff was stored, what their weekly routine was, because he was at work so much and they were in bed by the time he arrived home).

Not ideal for us, but we didn't have a choice - but absolutely no regrets at all

gaaagh · 16/08/2011 13:33

and by that i meant it was fine for the 6 months she was there all day, btw. not "it was fine when we could cut it shorter". the shorter days were to benefit DH's relationship with them, not because it wasn't working.

Original poster

LauraMysak · 16/08/2011 21:37

part-time is probably not an option because my work would say it would affect their business too much, they're a small company. I will try, to see what they say though. I don't think I could change my hours either because again my work would say it would affect their business because they need me at my desk for the full day. My commute is 40 mins on a good day so I won't be getting in til 6.30pm. My husband will be able to spend more time with baby though because he has a very short commute, only 10 mins and the nursery is next to his work so he will spend more time with baby when he finishes work at 5pm.

OP posts:

matana · 17/08/2011 12:01

If you feel uncomfortable about it will they let you work from home a couple of days a week? I just started back full time and my 9.5 month old goes to his childminder for 38 hours per week. However i've worked it so he only actually has two full days (8-6) there per week. My husband applied to work flexibly and so is able to pick him up at 2pm one day and on the other two days i work from home in the morning and collect him at lunch. I get most of my hours done in the morning and when he naps after lunch i can do the other hours. It's going to take some juggling, but i feel much better knowing he'll be in his own environment for three afternoons per week. It helps my case with work though that if i ever need to go in urgently i have family nearby who can help out with childcare on the days i'm working from home...

But as others have said, i think us mums are more concerned about it than our LOs are. Yours will thrive i'm sure either way.

RitaMorgan · 17/08/2011 12:05

Honestly, I would say it's not ideal. But if that's the way it has to be then there is no point worrying about it. Your baby will be ok.

Mandyville · 17/08/2011 12:10

Actually it sounds as though your DH will be able to pick up reasonably early. My daughter was fulltime from 9 months. It's got easier and easier as we go along and she's happy, secure and loving. I think nursery is better once they get to 2ish, but actually she was always happy - it was me who was sad!

drcrab · 17/08/2011 12:16

both mine went into fulltime nursery at 6-7 months. I managed to stagger mine for a few months so that they started off 3 days a week and slowly working their way into full time. It's heartwrenching for the parents (mums particularly perhaps although I imagine most dads also feel upset), but it's absolutely fine for the children. Really. The children do know who their parents are (v their key workers). it's fine.

gaaagh · 17/08/2011 13:51

it sounds like your DH is in an ideal position - how lucky he is to be able to pop along after a 5pm finish and be at the childcare 10min later! you needn't worry at all, honestly - he'll be glad of the bonding time, and I'm sure you will too

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