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Original poster

Has anyone regretted giving up a job to work p/t or be a sahm?

11 replies

mickb · 22/05/2011 08:40

If so, has it worked out for you in the end? Would be interested to hear your positive or negative stories.

OP posts:
tink123 · 23/05/2011 13:03

Never.... I have worked part time and been a SAHM. Loved both. Even when DD is older, I will never go permanent full time. I may work part time and then work extra shifts.

Obviously the big difference is money. We used to be as broke when I was full time as when I worked part time. :(

I think you live up to your means. It is so much easier for childcare and if child is ill.

lynehamrose · 23/05/2011 17:41

I have worked part time (3 days a week) since having my dc's. I wouldn't say I regret it, because its worked well for us. Having said that, my dc's are in primary school now, and I am considering returning to full time. We can manage ok on my p/t income, specially now childcare is less than when they were tiny, BUT its thinking about my pension and the long term view which makes me think it might be sensible. I think these days, the more security you have work-wise, the better, and I worry about the prospect of being poor in my old age. It won't be an easy decision, because I am really happy with the balance of my life, its nice to be around to pick up my dc's from school twice a week. But at the same time, I'm very conscious that with the boys in school, it's a bit of a luxury for me to be not working for four days out of seven (my days off plus weekend). So, the jurys out at the moment - but we're giving serious thought to this issue.

StillSquiffy · 24/05/2011 08:30

I finally jacked it in a couple of months ago and feel totally bereft. Need to take time out because DS has been diagnosed with a SEN and we need to put some plans in place for him, and that all clashed with a very busy period at work where it looked like I might need to go abroad. And with my DH working away from home Mon-Fri it kind of didn't compute.

Am taking a break for all the right reasons but finding it very very difficult. Suddenly I understand why kids play up when they have no 'structure' in their lives. Have gone from having to organise every half hour of my day like a military operation to making banana cake and mooching round the supermarket, totally unable to organise myself properly. So not recommended at the moment, but everyone tells me this is normal and I'll get in the swing of it.....

Original poster
mickb · 08/02/2012 20:58

Squiffy just coming back to this nearly a year later. Has it got any better now?

OP posts:
lagrandissima · 08/02/2012 21:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

lagrandissima · 08/02/2012 21:08

Mickb - oops, just realised this was an old thread Blush. Sorry to butt in!!

Original poster
mickb · 12/02/2012 23:33

No problems lagrandissma. thanks for your views. Is still a qu I'm interested in now. My own experince is that I dropped from f/t to p/t 13 months ago and have enjoyed having the extra breathing room outside of work but have struggled with loss of status at work as a result of being p/t . But that was largely cos I had to take a completely different job and drop my management role to attain p/t.

OP posts:
lagrandissima · 14/02/2012 18:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ggirl · 14/02/2012 19:00

I gave up and became sahm for both my dc's , but they're nearly 11 yrs apart and inbetween I did work but not in my career (nurse)

In hindisght I am a crap sahm , have no motivation to do what needs doing . Ended up putting weight on cos of comfort eating thru boredom.

I am now back nursing but regreet all those yrs missed.

posypoo · 15/02/2012 10:32

I went part-time 18 months ago, 2.5 days a week. I like the days off I have with LO, but I do lack structure on those days too, and sometimes wonder if I should be doing better things with our time together. At one point I considered working 4 days (but was turned down) - part of me felt maybe she'd have more fun with her childminder than with me. One of my reasons for considering 4 days was because I sometimes feel quite disconnected at work, because I'm not around for half the week, and I come back each week feeling like I've been on holiday. It takes me ages to get my brain going again, and I don't feel I perform as well as I used to. I also took a lower status job to get the work-life balance and feel looked down on a bit by the graduates I work with who are heading upwards. A year ago they were promoted and I wasn't, despite being better qualified by them, which has made me feel quite demotivated. I feel a little overlooked and occasionally wonder if I am being discriminated against because I am not here half the week.

But overall I wouldn't change things, and have already decided against getting a job working more than 3 days in the future. Even when LO is at school I know I want to be around to pick her up, do homework with her etc (though at that point I think I might try to get 4 or 5 short days), so I just have to accept that my career takes second place now!

Thanks for bringing this post up again op - I have been needing to write that rant for a while :)

Original poster
mickb · 18/02/2012 23:36

Thanks everyone. Really interesting to hear your experiences. Posypoo I've also felt disconnected and have also thought about upping to 4 days. Think will do when my little boy goes to school. In the meantime going to try to make most of time I've been got. Ggirl, hope you feel like you're catching up in the workplace after your time away? LaG -agree, often think that have 20+ years left to go further in workplace. Best of luck ladies x

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