Nervous about new role

[catkin83]

I've just been given a management position in the primary school I work in. It's more responsibility than I've ever had before and it'll involve quite a lot of events outside the 9-3ish hours I'm used to. It's also more hours overall (was 2 days a week before and will now be 4).

In many ways I'm pleased but I'm also having a major attack of nerves. It's actually quite a lonely job but what's made it fun (before promotion) was that the person I'm replacing was such a good friend. I'm absolutely gutted that they're leaving. It'll be the first time in 16yrs I haven't worked with them. I know it's pathetic, but I'm really struggling with that.

Also I'm really nervous about my 4yr old and 1yr old. I already find it difficult at times just doing 2 days a week and leaving them.

We really, really need the money though. I guess I just need a kick in the pants and a reminder that I'm lucky to get a part time job that actually has a bit of responsibility. So could you just tell me to get a life and get on with it? Thanks.

I bet you will find that once you get started, the 4 days will fly by and you will enjoy it. Don't forget that you have been offered the job because you are capable and the best person for it. You don't get to be SMT unless you deserve it!

As the person you are replacing is such a good friend, I'm sure you will still meet up and no doubt she will be a support to you in the early days of your new position.

If you are happy and confident with your childcare arrangements then rest assured that your children will be well looked after. Focus on getting those cuddles and seeing their smiles at the end of the day!

You say you need the money and so ultimately you are doing this for your family. It's perfectly natural to be nervous! You still have 3 whole days with your little ones so make the most of your family time and that's what they'll remember.

I'm impressed you got promoted because I have a 1 year old and I still feel like I have baby brain sometimes!

Good luck!

Thanks Timeforcake - such nice comments.

The person I'm replacing is actually a bloke and I don't know if I'll be able to stay in touch with him because I feel a bit weird about it. We get on so well in a work context and I really admire him. I'm very happily married and there's nothing dodgy about our friendship. I think maybe if I stayed in touch to socialise now he's leaving it would somehow cross a line though, and I'm just feeling really odd about it all. I don't see while I shouldn't have a male friend who I've worked so closely with, but somehow I would feel it was dangerous territory meeting up outside work. So I'm feeling really sad and strange about it. FWIW he's told me that he doesn't think men and women can be 'friends' and that there's always a sexual element. I disagreed strongly with him and then decided that that meant we probably can't stay in touch if that's his view.

So I am pleased about the promotion but I'm losing the best work friend I've ever had.

Thanks so much for the support. I think I will adjust and you're right that three whole days with the kids is great. I do still feel I have baby brain though so I'm going to have to really focus so as not to slip up.
Thanks again x

Don't forget you've got the holidays too! Something else to look forward to.
Plus you'll be increasing that salary!

What a shame about your friend- I totally understand what you mean though. Maybe the other side of it is that although you might not remain in touch, you will really be able to put your mark on your new position. You won't have to worry about him asking you about things that are going on/ feeling like you should do what he would've done. You'll really be able to do it your way, but I'm sure that's a bit daunting at first. Maybe you could stay in touch by email?? If not, you've probably learnt an awful lot from him over the years which will help when you start. Change can be good too you know, if scary at first! I know when a colleague of mine left after a long time, it was really sad, but there have been so many times I have tackled things in ways I learnt from him if you see what I mean. It gave me confidence too.

You can do it! x