Back at work and not fitting in

[sheenaqueen]

Well I have recently gone back to work after 9 months off on maternity and I have had to swap from days to evenings. I work in the same place just on a different team now so I feel like the 'new girl' all over again. The thing is I was so close to all my old team that I am finding it hard being on the outside. Half my team are students in Uni which doesn't help matters because I am in my early 30's and all they talk about is who they pulled on a Sat night or what clothes they like. I feel like I have lost all my confidence completely and I feel like I am too old for most things so even when they are all going out as a team I'm not sure I could go as I've lost touch with all that since being at home with the baby. There are some people on my team who are mums etc but they all seem so close knit I fear I may never fit in :(

Poor you. It will get better. I was so scared going back to work as I was a manager and had to fake my confidence. A year off the job I really thought I'd forgotten it all but it did come back to me. Must be harder with a different team though.

Going out I still panic about what to wear. Would never have worried before dd, but I don't want to stand out as out of fashion, but I go out so rarely that I don't want to buy new stuff for a one off.

I guess, what I'm saying is, most mums probably feel like this. Take a deep breath, big smile and go for it. What's the worst that could happen?

Can you meet up with the old team socially?

It will take time to get to know a new team but it will happen.

Buy a couple of celebrity gossip mags to help in gossipy conversations / tv news and just be yourself. They might be as nervous to know what to say to you too and waiting for a lead from you. Fake your confidence like PrincessScrumpy says, bet they think its real too. You are a nice person, they just don't know this yet so show em!!!!

aw thank you all so much, it was a bit better last night and I hope it will continue to get better all the time. I still am in touch with a lot of my old team and when I go into work some of them are still there before they go home so its nice to see them first! As for going out I also don't want to buy new stuff for a one off plus I hardly ever buy for myself anymore, its all for the kids...I would probably feel bad buying for myself! Thankyou again :O

Well I hope since you posted this thread things have improved? If not dont worry too much. You will fit in just needs a bit of time. Why dont you go out for one works night out. I had to do this once and did not know my new team that well. Sometimes if you go out for an evening you see different sides to people and you might even find them funny?! Then when your in work you can say things like good greif the state of you or do you remember doing that or whatever its a converstaion you will not have if you did not go out if you understand me. Sometimes you have to throw your self out there it does not always work but at least you can say you tried