WAHM with a baby - how do you do it?

[HollyFP]

(Just posted this in chat but should have been here really!)

I am self employed and on 'maternity leave' but only get SMP from the government. DD is 4.5 months. I am considering starting working again soonish, and can work from home via laptop.

I've just tried doing a bit of work today and it's virtually impossible when I have to look after DD at the same time! She's at the age now where she gets bored quickly so I have to stimulate her or else she complains, lots. So I can't just plonk her in her swing and get on with a day's work.

DD only naps for 30 minutes 3 times a days, so that isn't really much use either!
DH is also self employed but works in an office as he has 3 staff in there with him.

How do others do it? (I don't want to go down the childcare route.)

Holly, in your situation the answer honestly might be a local childminder who will have your daughter for half days. Even my nursery-hating oldest child used to look forward to going to Big Kate's House 'to play for a bit', and if you find the right childminder, you have a useful friend for times when you need an extra few hours to dash to hospital for the next birth work.

Could your mum or MIL come and babysit at your house while you work? You can still bf but wouldn't have to do much else.

I can't see how you could possibly work with a baby in the house during the day, especially with such short nap times. If you don't mind eating into your evenings and weekends then it can be done. I have a friend who is a writer and works from 7 - 11 most nights. Not ideal but she can't afford childcare and she can't afford to lose clients.

TBH it only gets worse as they get older, more mobile, more vocal and more demanding. I have school age DTs who can occupy themselves and I wouldn't do it for longer than an hour.

Holly, if you can afford it, manage on the SMP until it runs out. I don't think you can earn at the same time as claiming it anyway - may be wrong here, but that was the case when I received it a few years ago.

My HV told me flat-out that I couldn't work with a baby in the home and that is absolutely right. I got a childminder when DD was 5.5 mths, also EBF, and found it really really hard. Still a big regret for me as I could have waited a few more months.

I work from home and took 6 months maternity leave to have DS2 and DS3. I have to work during naptime (another fan of investing in getting nap routine established before starting work again). DS2 is at school now. DS3 is 14 months and has a nap in the morning for two hours (when I get most of my work done) and another hour after school pick up (DS1 and DS2 use that time for wind-down TV-watching / homework doing pre-tea). So I get about 3 hours a day, but I dip in and out of the laptop duriing the day and sometimes DS3 just sits on my knee with me singing 'ba ba black sheep' while I answer emails! I do feel guilty though that I'm not 100% there for the DSs but I hope that I am showing them that work is something you have to do to get money and they are actually lucky that they have a mummy at home and not in an office all day every day.

Agree with everyone else, working and looking after a baby at home proved impossible for me too. So I got a babysitter 5 half days/week at home looking after dd from about 4 months meaning I could work and still bf when needed. Worked well for me because I wanted to be near dd at that age and it meant I could employ a young student with less experience and pay less (in fact she turned out to be brilliant) without being nervous.

Working from home is great but it's not an option that suits everyone. I returned to my freelance job last April when DS was 8 months old. Being organised does help but this can soon go out of the window if your clients aren't organised. I've lost count of the number of times I've tried to fit jobs in around nap times (like yours, DS would only sleep around 30 mins) only to find that clients hadn't done the things they said they'd do. It's really frustrating; especially when time isn't on your side.

In the end, we put DS into nursery two days a week. He loves it and I'm able to get some work done!