Work have asked me to go on a week residential course

[PavlovtheCat]

I have been asked to go on a weeks residential (assessed) course in order to become a facilitator for a particular accredited programme with my work (CBT related). It is related to my previous work experiences before it all changed while I was on maternity leave so this would be bringing me up to date. Without this, I cannot run the new type of programme/group.

I am still breastfeeding my son. He will be 14 months by the time i do the group in two months. I have not been away from him ever, and while we are reducing the feeding anyway, we are not stopping necessarily, i want to be guided by him, not my work.

I have not (as yet) been directed to attend this course, i do have the option to say no, however, as i work in the public sector, it has been announced that this is the last training opportunity to do this course, they will be running no more. Most of my contemporaries at work are running this course and those who are not, it is anticipated they will be on this course. So, while not directed, there are possible implications to my career advancement/how i might be perceived in my role. I am probably able to carve out another 'niche' but not guaranteed, and with redundancies looming over my head, i feel i have no choice but to do this.

I guess I am posting for a bit of 'oh dear' rather than to be told i must do it. I sort of know i have no choice really but it is going to mean the end of breastfeeding as DH will have to look after both children for the whole week .

And, more than that, I am feeling tearful already at the thought of being away from him for so long .

Sorry, posted the wrong link. Just trying to find the right one now!

Pavlov - I can't find it now but there's a fair bit of discussion online saying it's ok to freeze (I bet all you know all this already).

belle yes, have done freezing, used it to cook food with quite recently as DS never drinks it! I am not so concerned about the physically not taking my milk, happy for him to drink formula now for one week if he took it! it is more that actual feeding of him myself, and the comfort and needing linked in with that I guess.

Ah well, it has to be broken one day i guess. And as many have said, might not be that bad after all and he might want it when i get back

i guess i will just have to concentrate on the fact there is a swimming pool/gym and bar in the hotel, and also WIFI so I shall be able to talk to the family mn

Pav - you're impressively pragmatic!

It really doesn't have to mean the end of bf - you should be able to leave a child at this age, and he'll pick up again where he left off - if he wants to. It may mark the natural end, but that will only be if your ds doesn't want it any more. Don't worry about him not taking a bottle - he's 14 months so doesn't need one. If you are keen for him to still have breastmilk, express a supply before the course, and leave for your DH to give in a cup. Or just let him drink ordinary milk for that week, and pick up with bf on your return. Sounds like a marvellous opportunity for your children to have daddy-time, and a great opportunity for you.

I really feel for you Pav. At that age I would have really really not wanted to leave my 14mo for a week regardless of BF and I would think they can't make you go. But it sounds like it is a rare oportunity for this training and it would be v good for you to do it And it sounds like you want to do the course.

OTOH, I have, several times now, had DH take my DS away for 3-4 days at a time and we have just carried on BF when he got back with no problems at all. Your supply will be very well established, IMHO it is likely you will be able to pick up where you left off.

But I totally understand you want to be able to BF him and not be 3 hours away. (If it was my job, I would just say no, but then my job is horrible, likely to disappear soon anyway, and my managers generally wouldn't piss on you if you were on fire, so I would not be prepared to go out of my way to accomodate their plans)

It's not going to be very nice to leave your DS for a week but he really will not suffer and breastfeeding should resume with no problems at all.

i think i am going to decline the offer. On the face of it, ti is good training, however it is a merger of two types of training and it is highly possible/probable that it will change again in the next year or so anyway. I have already done 3 lots of residential training that is now obsolete. I will draft a letter advising that the way i have chosen to raise my family is not currently conducive to residential training so far away, however should be possible in the future when I will be available for further opportunities, and in the mean time i shall make myself available to take on work that will free up others to do the groups i would otherwise be doing. I really do not feel comfortable about it, i really feel like I am being pressured to do something that could have adverse affects on the way i choose to raise my son - while he may be fine and BF when i return, he may also self wean which would not otherwise happen.

You have to do what feels best for you and your family.

I can't believe he is 14 months already though .

not yet! he is one year old tomorrow! he will be 14 months at the time of the course at the end of Jan! It has gone quickly though, AND, AND he took two steps on his own today!

OMG that is brilliant .

Happy birthday for tomorrow BabyPavlov .

Pavlov - good for you!

Happy birthday to DS too!