Want to cry...Just did KIT day leaving 9 mo dd

[serendipity81]

Tell me it gets better as they get older!
I'm currently on Maternity leave, my dd is nearly 9 months.
She has always been EBF and I've never really left her for long.
I'm only in for 2 half days this week, a full day at the end of Nov and then go back full time end of Dec/ beg of Jan.
So dd will be 11 1/2 months when I go back full time.
Technically she's fine without a bf for most of the day as she's on 3 meals a day and seems happy to cluster feed.
But...she was so teary today when I left her with childminder and I don't think she's ready.
Does it get better as they get older? Will she be ok at 11/12 months or is it always a wrench? I kinda feel like I never want to leave her....ever!

oh yes, it really does. You'll know she's happy and you'll be busy and sociable at work and it will all click nicely into place.

Ask childminder what DDwas like half an hour after you left - bet she was fine. Usually they cry when you leave and whn they see you buy are deviously fine in between!

ANd also, our DD is now 3 and enjoyng 'big nursery' and is is so lovely hearing what she does, even though we miss her. Today she came home all excited as they had walked to the shop tobuy strawberries then used ht especial blender to make milkshake smoothies and "it was pink and it was messy and it was delicoius Mummy!"

And yu will enjoy (promise you you will!) growing as a person ad going back home to tell your baby about what her Mummy has contributed to the world* too. Honest, it does get easier.

*not that while rasing a child you are not contributing...hopefully you get my sentiment.

oh it does get much easier... I'm actually on my first day back at work leaving my 3 year old ds and 9 month old dd with our nanny. It's really hard and I'm very jealous of our nanny getting to spend time with my children (ok so it's her job, and i pay her to do it!) but I find it better to focus on the positives. I get a whole half an hour on the train reading my book which is something I haven't done in aaaages! I get to dawdle over lunch, when was the last time you spent a whole hour having lunch? It's marvellous!

Thanks I think it was a number of things that made it more difficult e.g. got stuck in traffic so was rushing and didn't hand over properly. I think if she had been at home dd would have been a lot more settled. My sister has got her tomorrow at home so I'm sure that will be much better.
I think it's just how dd has been behaving this afternoon that has taken me aback - she will not let me put her down and is so clingy. Its almost like shes saying "please don't leave me again mummy!"

It's a classic age to get separation anxiety so she really isn't traumatised, but it's hard for her to understand that you will be back. She will learn in the end that you aren't leaving her forever. I read somewhere that playing lots of hide and seek games helps babies learn to deal with separation, they learn that when someone disappears from sight they will return.

Do you really have to go back to work ? The only thing that takes me away from my ds is financial need so ignore this if you don't have an option. Sounds like you're struggling with this and i do sympathise as when they are small they do need us. will probably get loads of posts saying that it doesn't matter who is looking after them if properly cared for, which may be true, but this is about the bond between you and your child and also how you feel. My sibs and i were pretty much farmed out as children and it's deeply affected our relationships with parents and others. Be brave! It's good you have a sister to help out though.