I get this allllll the time, please tell me I'm not alone

[Novascotia33]

Fellow work from home ladies - are you constantly having people say to you 'I really don't know how you do it?'. Because I am.

Sorry this is just a bit of a rant, but I have my own business, an 8 month year old and a 2 year old, I mainly work in the evenings, weekends and nap times (theirs). Sure there's not enough hours in the day, but I love what I do for a living and I love being a Mum, so somehow I make it all work. However I find myself permanently having to field the 'how do you do it' question, I feel like they're slightly suggesting I cannot be looking after my kids properly. Am I just being paranoid. Sometimes I feel rather than people just being pleased for me, they somehow want me to justify my busy life.

I generally just make a joke out of it. But what I feel like saying is, 'well I don't waste my time watching s* on tv every night for like you do for a start'

Do you guys get this too, come and share my aggravation please.

hi, i work part time and hubby often works away so, it's down to me to do all that's involved in caring for our 2 kids. i have had similar comments but i think people are just being nice and acknowledging that you are working your butt off. also, it really doesn't matter what other people think of your set-up anyway - don't look to them to fulfill your self esteem needs.

I think they're trying to pay you a compliment and not at all questioning your parenting skills.

Padwan, you're so right. I think people are just being nice, and it is a compliment to have people act in 'wonder' at how you do all that you do, I was just having a bit of a rant. I just had a whole week of it, and was running out of things to say. I cannot put my finger on it, it's almost like people are aggravated that I pack more into a day than they do, but as anyone who does this sort of thing knows, there are indeed massive sacrifices. No, for sure to look other peoples opinion of you as a way of computing your own happiness is a very slippery slope. Thanks for responding.

doozle I'm sure you're right too. I guess really I'm just not sure what to say in response. It doesn't really matter I know, I just had to get it off my chest.

It is a compliment but you have to remember that thre are ambitious people and there are totally unambitious people out there and the two will always boggle at each other. You might see them as lazy, they might see your lifestyle as unsustainable.

My DH and I are the unambitious type, we work to live, not the other way round and we guard our free/idle time jealously. We both like to invest in ourselves (hobbies, volunteering, fun etc) as well as our income-potential and kids. Work sucks.

In fact I am only self-employed because the work kind of fell into my lap and it gives me flexibility to work during school hours.

@silkstalkings, lol, I absolutely love your reply and your take on life.

@Nova, I empathise. I really do. I work from home as a bookkeeper/accountant and I get similar comments all the time perhaps because I have 2 autistic kids. I take them as compliments even when (rarely) I detect some sarcasm.:)

Anyway, merely having 3 kids is apparently enough to merit the same remark often enough ime. One of mine is also on the spectrum so yes, that adds be-haloed admiration points too.
Actually I'll admit to bafflement myself at how some SAHMs appear to have nothing more interesting in their lives than X-Factor and using too many unnnecessary exclamation marks on Facebook and still can't cope with volunteering or community thing. Too much housework, not enough fun imo.

"I am pathologically organised and mildly psychotic" tends to stop people asking twice

Well I'm self-employed too, and er, I don't know how you do it!

But that's because we've recently got a puppy and the sudden inability to sit at the laptop for 16 hours straight if that's what the project demands is requiring some readjustmnet from me, so I can't imagine how hard it must be with DCs.

But on the other hand, you adjust. I used to commute for up to 4 hours a day, I couldn't bear to do that now, but it seemed almost ok at the time. I'm already starting to get used to the dog, and it's only been a couple of weeks. I imagine after a couple of years the kids/work at home thing becomes second nature too!

Talkinpeace - fantastic, I'll take that for a test run this week. haha.

If only I was pathologically orgnised, I wish.

Oh, how nice (hate that word) to see I am not alone either! Yes, get it all the time: "How do you do it?!" "You must be superwoman!" etc etc

And, in fact, when sometimes when I get such comments I start to panic and think, well, how DO I do it?

I'm a mum of 3 (including a toddler) and another on the way (last one). I was solicitor but am now self employed as a freelance writer. The youngest is at nursery 2-3 mornings a week, the older ones at school. I work on those 2 mornings, some evenings and occasionally one day at the weekend. I'm highly organised and disciplined. That's the only way you can juggle home/children/work (husband does long hours!).

I love my work and love that I can work from home. And television is a real treat, not a nightly routine. Spooks is my 'must have' of the week right now - anything else is a bonus but out of the rubbish that's on - what is there anyway?! I'd rather exercise my brain.

And anyone can 'do it' if they really wanted to.

I get that comment all the time! I just shrug. I love being self-employed and a mum at the same time and wouldn't have it any other way.