Stay overseas or move home for support

[emmyloo2]

This is a little pre-emptive but I am having my first baby in November. My husband and I currently live overseas and we have not lived in our home country (Australia) for 6 years or so. We are in the UK at the moment in a small city where we both work full-time. I am going on maternity leave at the end of October and plan to take around 5-6 months off, most of which will be paid.

When I first got pregnant we decided that we would definitely move home after having the baby because we have both sets of parents there and I would find a new job in our home city. My husband would simply transfer with his company. However, my current job is really going well and a big part of me is quite disappointed to be going on maternity leave and having to start with a new company in a new job. Plus this company is very flexible and I am sure I could negotiate part-time or working from home one day or so. They are very flexible that way and the hours, particularly for my industry, are very good.

However, this would mean we would have to put the baby into nursery as opposed to having my Mum and MIL available for full-time care.

Am we crazy for even contemplating staying here and not going home to make sure of free childcare. My Mum is desparate for her first grandchild and without a doubt would be willing to look after him day and night.

Just part of me finds the idea of coming back into the same role with the same company quite comforting rather than struggling to find something back home, which will be fine, except I am not sure they would be willing to offer part-time work.

I just want to make the right decision and not be unrealistic about what's it like to work and have a new baby.

Any advice would be appreciated!

Thanks

Sorry....should also add the city we live in is smaller than our home town and offers a slightly better work life balance, which is another attraction. But not sure any of this counters the huge benefit of having family around and available...

I would say if you are going to regret moving home then it's not worth it - you can always try out staying in the UK and see how you get on - it's not as though you're burning any bridges. Plenty of children are looked after in nurseries and they don't suffer :)

Good luck, whatever you decide.

I say stick with what you know right now - you can make great friends through ante-natal / baby groups which can provide lots of support. Going back to work for a company you like and a job you enjoy, is a fantastic position to be in. Also you have the benefit that your employers know you so can give you credit for your good work to date (ie they know you're good at what you do, you've already proved yourself, so if you need unexpected days off because of child being ill etc they will understand).

It is really hard re GPs - you may find that once your child is a little older you really do want to be nearer family. I would wait and see how things go - don't make any decisions until after you've had the baby.

Congratulations btw!

Try staying where you are first. Going back to work after having a baby is something that is much easier if going back to something you know, rather than starting completely afresh.

We don't have any family support, and were very happy with ds's nursery care all through. Having family do all your child care is not without it's own challenges as you see on here !

Thanks everybody for the advice. It is good to have some reassurance that we are not completely crazy for contemplating staying. It really is the continuity with employment that is the main thing - I know the company, I know the people and I know the work. Starting all over again in a new job with a new baby (even with my Mum available to help) actually makes me feel more anxious than the thought of going back to work and using a nursery. There are some lovely nurseries right near our home and they are affordable. PLus my husband would be able to negotiate flexible working as well.

I think we will give it a short. No harm and if it doesn't work out we can always pack up and go home. But once we go home, we wouldn't be able to come back.