advise on sick leave and maternity leave and possibly being completely hard faced really.

[BarbieLovesKen]

Im probably going to get flamed for this and I can understand why I would particulary in these recessionary times, I know how much annoyance people have towards public sector employees.

Going to try and explain without revealing too much so please forgive me. Please be blunt, I know this probably sounds appalling but I would appreciate honest opinions.

I am a public sector employee (Ireland). I had my ds in January. Because of complications with pregnancy, I was signed off from work for the last 7 weeks of my pregnancy by my Doctor. Im just after finishing maternity leave but not back in work until Nov as Im using up accrued annual leave.

I was bullied to a horrendous level by my line manager during my pregnancy. This lady is notorious for her behaviour, having two employees previously transfer because of her (one was pregnant) and was always quite nasty but definately became much, much worse once I announced my pregnancy. This included awful comments about my being pregnant, trying to get my contract terminated for no other reason than my being pregnant. I really cant go in to too much here. I recently met with her bosse's boss, read out 8 pages (A4 typed) of incidents over the last while, he completely agreed with me, said shes a cunt [shocked], he knows what shes doing and if it was the private sector he would strangle her and then fire her. All other members of management have agreed that she "has it out for me". I have attended occupational health and Doctor there recommends I do not return to that department, ditto Employee counselling service and HR.

I have told them all I do not want to cause any fuss, put in any complaint etc.. as I simply do not feel like I can go up against this very vicious and devious woman. To be honest, Im on AD's at the minute and although its for numerous reasons, work has definately contributed. Im looking for a transfer. I have been having panic attacks and horrible dreams about this women as the time for me to return approaches. Horrible thing is, I love my job.

Anway, I've just received a BFP. We are very happy, if a bit shocked. Im due next June and am absolutely terrified at the thoughts of going back pregnant as I had such a terrible experience last time around I am sick at the thoughts of it.

Most people are suggesting that I just "go sick" i.e. in November, go sick for the whole of my pregnancy as its the services fault I feel this way in the first place and they should not have allowed it to happen. Then go on maternity leave mid May. This would mean I would be, in total, out of work for over 2 years but would be paid for most of it as Im public service??

pressed post accidently. Would that be a really disgusting thing to do??

My first thought is that we get people going on about the Patriarchy when some bitches women make life 10 x harder for women than men ever do!

You shouldn't just go "sick". You should return, but something has to happen about the set up here. It sounds like you have some support within the organisation. It is very wrong that you should feel bullied out.

This sounds a bit twee, but would looking at things like Transactional Analysis help? I had a big problem with one person once upon time. A bit of positive reinforcement that I should not be treated like that, and help to change MY behaviour to deal with these situations - as in not allowing myself to be bullied - made a HUGE difference to me. The thinking is that if YOU respond to the person in a different way, they are forced to change their behaviour too. It worked really well for me.

No it wouldn't be disgusting. I think the level of stress you are under warrants being off sick, and I don't see why you should go back, particularly whilst pregnant, to that level of bullying - especially if the bosses are doing nothing about it!

But then what happens after the next lot of maternity leave. Does the problem continue? Do you decide THEN to leave?

Thank you both so much.

Portofino, I know your right - I should go back and I shouldnt feel bullied out but I just dont feel strong enough, I suppose, to go up against this "lady" at the minute. Although it sounds like I've support in work, I am dubious that when push comes to shove would anyone really stand by what they've witnessed etc? I just dont think I can take the stress of mediation/ arguements blah blah at the minute. I suppose I just want an easy way out. When I spoke to the boss, he said I could go back and stand up to her but that he could see her doing something awful to be and there being an explosion one day. Its very frustrating that all this has been allowed. (thats exactly it hairytriangle)

He also told me that if I was going to insist on seeking a transfer (which I was) that we would have to keep it quite as if she found out, she would blacken my name to every department because shes a lunatic

Portofino, thats the thing, I dont know whats going to happen after the next set and Id feel so brazen and awkard returning after pulling this! that said, after whats happened, I do feel like saying "fuck them" and having a while off... Id hope to have a transfer to another department to return to.

the trouble is Barbie it is very difficult when you are being bullied by such a strong character at work, and whilst pregnant I can imagine it's ten times magnified as well!

And the fact that managers admit they know about how terrible it is, but don't do anything about it makes it so much worse.

I would think to the short-medium term, take time off sick and make it clear that it is due to the bullying, and see if it gets dealt with. You should them be in a position to return after it's dealt with and when you feel better and well enough to cope with it.

You boss's boss sounds gob-smackingly unprofessional TBH.

My advice would be ( and I know it is hard) - to go back knowing that you are the better person, knowing that your bosses also know that! Keep calm. Don't rise to it. Record everything. Can you give some rough examples of the things she does, or says, because then the clever MNetters will come up with calm, rational ways of responding to it.

Adult bullies are different from child bullies. I guess this woman will not beat you up or steal your dinner money. Though video footage of such activity might be useful at a tribunal... She can only hurt you with what she says. She must surely be a complete coward because bullies always are. Don]t give her the power!

Just from a practical point of view your maternity pay be be affected if you are off sick for a long time. If you go onto a half pay situation then your maty leave may be worked out on this (I don't know about the Irish regulations but would be worth checking)

I personally think you need to go back - don't let this woman win! I wouldn't worry about her blackening your name - I imagine that if her boss knows she's a lunatic then so will they.

Oh and congratulation on the bfp!!!

I see theres a new private message option here - can I send you the list I brought into my boss (as I dont want to say too much on here) if its ok? dont want to bore you either though?

sorry that was to portofino

Of course!

How on earth can they admit that she is awful and vindictive and that yes, she does have a vendetta against you and then not do anything?

They are breaking the law here. They have a duty of care towards their employees and that specifies that everyone should be treated fairly and equally.

If you go off sick it will affect your maternity pay as you have to be working 26 consecutive weeks prior to your pregnancy to qualify for statutory mat pay and most companies work on a similar basis- or may only pay you pro rata.

If she is a well known loony I do not believe that it would blacken your name- in fact quite the opposite as who in the right mind would put up with her.

I would go back as normal and the minute that she says or does something unreasonable report her in house to her boss, go through this 3 times and if it continues tell her boss that if she is not dealt with appropriately you have no choice but to take them to a tribunal as she is making it impossible for you to work there.

Thanks again folks, youve all been so helpful.

Bethjeff - its so frustrating. Everyone is wondering exactly the same thing thing. I just cant understand how she continuously gets away with it.

Am worried about statutory mat pay now - even if Im on sick leave, I presumed I was making PRSI contributions.

Heres what I got of citizens advice:

Maternity Benefit is paid by the Department of Social Protection to women who have a certain number of paid PRSI contributions on their social insurance record and who are in insurable employment up to the first day of their maternity leave. The last day of work can be within 16 weeks of the end of the week your baby is due.

The PRSI contributions can be from employment or self-employment - PRSI classes that count for Maternity Benefit are A, E, H and S (self-employed).

If you are employed you must have:

At least 39 weeks PRSI paid in the 12-month period before the first day of your maternity leave
Or

At least 39 weeks PRSI paid since first starting work and at least 39 weeks PRSI paid or credited in the relevant tax year or in the tax year immediately following the relevant tax year. For example, if you are going on maternity leave in 2010, the relevant tax year is 2008 and the year following that is 2009.
Or

At least 26 weeks PRSI paid in the relevant tax year and at least 26 weeks PRSI paid in the tax year immediately before the relevant tax year. For example, if you are going on maternity leave in 2010, the relevant tax year is 2008 and the year before that is 2007.

Am I reading it right? I worked all of 2008 and 2009 so I think Ill be ok?

Also in regard to what lal123 said regarding half pay, was worried about this too - am going to have to check it out.

Oh, I know Your all right.... [sigh]

Barbie, you might want to try posting this on an Irish board as I am not sure that everyone caught the fact that you are employed in the Irish public sector, which will have different rules to here, so people may well end up giving you well-meaning, but incorrect, advice.

Thats true annh, thanks a million. That said, there isnt any Irish board thats as good as here!!!

Saw your list! Will respond when I get a mo.