I am a mother of two beautiful children; a 2 and a half year old and 7 month old and I am returning to work in a months time. I have immensely enjoyed maternity leave but the return to work has me completely stressed. I will be working 4 days a week as a secondary teacher, but am taking on further responsibility to help with the childcare costs for both children. There are a number of issues?I don?t know where to begin.
Firstly, I am still breastfeeding my 7 month old, although he is on solids 3 times a day now too. I have done all the night feeds and have not had more than 5 hrs sleep in any one go (usually 3 hrs). So exhaustion isn?t helping. I am trying to wean off breastfeeding and help baby to learn to sleep by himself. My husband was willing to help try strategies for sleep, but only at the weekends so I gave up on the idea as there would be no consistency. So baby is entirely dependent on me to sleep now, and is mostly fed to sleep. No one else can put him to sleep. If I ask my husband to help out he says ?I can?t get him to sleep?. I am worried about his sleep at the childminders when I return to work.
Next, I am starting to prepare some work before I go back, but don?t seem to have any time to do it. Dinner/bath/ bed routine with 2 children takes ages if I do it alone, because I have to get one settled before I can start on the other. Bed is 8 at the earliest and then baby?s first sleep is usually only half an hour, so I need to lie with him for another 20 minutes. My husband usually gets in from work about 7.30 ? 8.00pm and will help out with bed/baths and we may fit dinner in at the same time or not until 9pm. Husband will help me with quick tidy up/washing up/ironing for half hour and usually there is a spare half and hour before we go to bed. When I return to work I will be doing all the pick-ups from childcare (husbands work is not flexible, boss? wife stay at home mum, other people in his dept young/single/childless so willing to work long hours) and will get home at 5.30pm have to fit in the rest of my work every evening. How?
I feel as if I am doing everything. I know my husband gets in late every evening and helps out for a bit, but I am doing about 90% of the housework from Mon-Fri and I feel as if potty training/weaning/ sleeping issues are entirely left to me. Also, although my husband?s job earns slightly more than mine, mine has to fit entirely around his. Neither of us have family nearby and we don?t get five minutes to spend with each other. I am reluctant to try suggestions of earlier bedtimes. If I get the children to bed by 7.30, he will never see them. Anyone in a similar position, advice please. I am close to breaking point.