How would you word this?

[hobbgoblin]

My DP and I have secured catering opportunities for a local charitable organisation on the basis that DP's business is local (their ethos is to be community based/support local business and industry) and of a related nature to outside catering.

In the past this has been a joint affair. I have no funds to invest and so all the equipment has been purchased by DP either on credit card or through the profit from each event, i.e. we have built up the equipment we have with each event we have done and now have quite a decent 'outfit'. I have been in charge of all the liaison with this charity and have also had to steer DP away from his 'burger van' ideals more towards those of the charity. I'd say I've been instrumental in developing our good relationship, and indeed spin off events have been secured due to my home made cakes, biscuits and chilli con carne!

Now my problem is this:

DP and I are in the middle of planning for a summer event with this charity and the plan was for him to do hot food and me to do cakes and pimms in a separate marquee. I have forwarded all the final details to the area manager and she is waiting me to confirm on seating, etc. However, DP and I have separated and in the last week it has become intolerable and we are no longer working together and really barely speaking. He will stitch me up massively given the chance .

What I need is to maintain my relationship with the charity while I urgently try and find an investor or a loan so that I can take over. I could do the summer event on my own (just my cakes stall - DP could do the hot food) but DP is very arrogant and will try and warn me off being involved, yet the charity people are not that happy with him tbh. they prefer to deal with me.

What I'm trying to say is I feel I could make a go of this and am more what the charity wants, except for the fact that I am not a local business as yet so they'd lose that aspect. I just don't know what to tell them.

If I just let DP get on with it I will lose the work opportunity. If I try and muscle in I may sour the relationship with the charity.

In addition to all this, a separate division of the charity has asked me to quote for a huge 4 day event later this year. The menu is all mine and they were very keen. DP knows about this as we would have done it 'together' but he doesn't know how to cook and he also has no contact details for the person I've been dealing with. What do I do about that contract if I get it?

I feel really stuck at the moment. I have another thread going about all this but on this one I just wanted to ask specifics about how to let an organisation know you are experiencing relationship breakdown and still keep the work?

Ooh Hobb, sorry to hear of further troubles with your P.

If you have a decent contact within the charity you should probably get a meeting with them yourself, without P knowing about it, and lay your cards on the table. Explain that the business partnership is going to be dissolved as the personal partnership has already disintegrated, but that they are valuable customers and you want to be able to still provide a service for them.

How easy is it going to be to get your loan to take over? Is your P going to be a complete arse about it and obstruct you? IF so, can you start again on your own? I realise that could be extremely hard, given that you have no equipment but if you do start again, you might qualify for a small business start up loan (if anyone is still offering them)

In the end, if you can provide the service they require, they're not going to be too bothered about the relationship aspect of it, I wouldn't think. They know you, they trust you already, they like dealing with you. Maintain a fully professional front - say you have every intention of running the business the same way as it was before (can you do this?) and the only difference is it will be just you in charge. They might be happier with that!

hobb - where in the uk are you? might be able to help if you are local(ish) to me.

Hiya Thumb.

The awful, but in some ways thankful, thing is I never financially invested. I have just given my time for free for the last 18 months. Every event we have done I have taken no salary. It has only been recently since my maternity period ended that DP put me on the books and paid me minimum wage for developing a sandwich line and continuing to build links within the charity.

So, I walk away with no losses or financial ties to break but I have given SO MUCH free input. I am just glad that no matter how much I may have set him up with my negotiating skills and hard graft in providing the service, he will never be able to do much more than cook a couple of hundred sausages on his barbecue.

I will speak to the charity through my area manager contact and offer to supply cakes/pimms alongside DP's hot food as we would have done, but as a separate business now and see if they go for that. I could hire the stuff for that and cover my costs with a little bit over to re-invest I think. I need to sit down and cost it all out. But my cashflow could be tricky as I am living off Tax credits only now that I don't have my pathetic salary from DP coming in.

I notice Wilko have a steel gazebo for £60 (reduced) which would do the job for now until winter weather when I'd need a proper marquee.

I think this is all I can do. Have spoken to friend about use of her catering kitchen so I could consider doing quite a bit of stuff here and there but it will be very hard indeed on my own. I just don't know if it is too risky doing this single handedly.

Sorry for thinking aloud so much.

Jax I am in Herts - St Albans if that helps at all. Not sure what you may be thinking...

If you don't have too much in the way of initial outlay, and you already have some customer goodwill built up, I think your risk (financially at least) shouldn't be too bad.

Can you move into speciality cakes as a diversification? Wedding/birthday etc?

And although you may not have gained anything financially from this, as you say, neither have you really lost anything - and in the meantime you have gained valuable experience (and the aforementioned good will).

Shame your P is still being such a knobend.

You can do it you know - if you have full control over it, then you will be able to take on things that you can handle easily and slowly build up. As your business increases, you'll be able to afford help - perhaps initially your friend with the catering kitchen might be able to lend a hand?

hobbgoblin, I am in the S Bucks area and was just wondering if I could help in any way.

It sounds like you have all bases covered. I have some friends who live St Albans way, thought maybe if they were at the event they might be able to help you.

I dont do CAT but if you want to email me on tigs @ fastmail dot fm I will see what I can do.