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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

The "so what can we actually do" thread...

547 replies

ImSoNotTelling · 25/05/2010 17:18

Hello

Following on from the thread about changing the law on rape to grant anonimity to the accused, a few people have started to think about what we can do to get involved, to actually try and change stuff.

So I guess this thread is for suggestions, ideas, and for people to link up to actually try to change things.

So far we have someone possibly standing for pariament!

So come on everyone.

What's the plan....

OP posts:
Diamondback · 31/08/2010 19:40

Yes, if it's still happening, let's do it! I really think it should be 'ibelieveyou.co.uk' or dotcom, whatever, rather than 'stoprape.com' as it's always better to keep to one, simple, clear, consistent message, and the 'I believe you' tagline really seems to be grabbing people.

This can then be stripped across all associated posters/ads/buttons - ie, "I believe you: over 90% of all rape allegations are true." Or "I believe you: senior police officers oppose anonymity for rape defendants." "I believe you: most rapists are known to the victim." etc

Also, sadly, if you name the campaign website 'stoprape' a lot of people will immediately switch off and turn away, whereas 'I believe you' is more likely to intrigue people and draw them in.

The bus advert idea was floated - I believe that the Atheist bus was funded by lots of members of the public donating a fiver each. It's fairly easy to set up a PayPal 'donate now' button on your website. Then it's just a case of PR effort to attract funding.

I'd also advocate cute button badges to be posted to celebrities, women's mags, etc. Make it as attractive and accessible as the breast cancer campaign.

Then, when we start gaining funding, start distributing info packs to teachers and sexual health educators.

And the focus should be on busting rape myths. If we bust rape myths, the treatment of victims and the conviction rate will improve.

TheButterflyEffect · 31/08/2010 21:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

KittyTwoShoes · 05/09/2010 11:55

Yes, let's definitely do something! I have nothing particularly useful to say at the moment other than I definitely want to be involved... really just bumping and marking my place.

ElephantsAndMiasmas · 06/09/2010 14:22

ooh this is back! anyone else around?

ISNT · 06/09/2010 14:26

Hello! I'm here...

proles bought a domain name...

I think we should do something Smile

ElephantsAndMiasmas · 06/09/2010 14:36

So do i. It keeps coming into my head. Do you think we might be better off teaming up with women's aid, MNHQ, Eaves etc? God knows WA get enough name checks on here :( Or hassling one of those people to do a campaign?

While "stop rape" makes it sound all womens-libby (not that I personally mind about that) and confrontational, and kind of unfortunately indicates that stopping (being) rape(d) is an easy thing to do, "I believe you" puts the emphasis in the right place, which is in bringing justice about for the victims, starting with giving them some credence.

tabouleh · 06/09/2010 14:57

Hello - I think that starting something amongst interested MNers would be good - it would then be possible to team up with other organisations - link to them etc.

I think that using a wordpress blog is a good way to start something like this.

Anyone have any experience with that - I think you can host the blog under your own domain name and then it doesn't have wordpress in the title.

Then it makes it easy for multiple people to work on it together.

There could be a section "why I got involved with this campaign" - eg for me really it is reading the stories on MN in relationships and realising the reality of rape then going on to read things like the Baroness Stern report etc.

I think it would be good to highlight the number of stories per week on "false accusation" of rape v the actual rape cases in the courts each week etc.

From what I've see on various campaigns they can go from something fairly small to having a larger impact once they are picked up on in the mainstream media.

Proles - do you know if the domain name is traceable back to your RL details - you may want to post on Geeky section there was a discussion about this very thing recently.

Alternatively we could delete posts here which mention who bought the domain?

KittyTwoShoes · 30/09/2010 15:58

Ohhh just bumping this up because I definitely want to do something and it keeps sliding away!

I have a blog but mine is blogger not wordpress... still, I imagine much of the html is the same? I can give it a go if we go down that route, I quite enjoy it. And I have lots of time, being a lazy student and all Wink

Also I agree with Elephants, obviously it would be great to stop rape but really, we probably can't - crime happens, there'll always be rapists just like there will always be murderers and robbers. I think we should be about changing attitudes towards it.

I think a lot of people, also, don't necessarily realise how harmful their attitudes to rape are even if they mean well. For instance, my best friend said to me, "Oh my god, Kitty, you shouldn't have gone into that car park...". She didn't mean to say, "It's your own fault," but it's indicative. She's horified that she said that, now, and is always apologising for it. I think a lot of people genuinely don't even know what they're doing, which is what we should target. In my opinion, anyway.

ElephantsAndMiasmas · 30/09/2010 16:48

Blog sounds like a great idea.

Oh kitty :(

Trouble is, it's a short leap from regret: "i wish that hadn't happened to you, to wondering how it could have been avoided "wish you'd never gone into that carpark", to imagining that attacks could be avoided if people didn't go into carparks "you shouldn't have gone into that carpark."

It's about changing attitudes. From "women can and should avoid it, but if they are the one in a million who gets attacked they probably did something wrong." to "women can't avoid it, home is more dangerous than the street, friends are more dangerous than strangers, and very few women lie about it, so we believe you".

chocolatestar · 30/09/2010 18:23

I would like to help if I can.

JessinAvalon · 30/09/2010 19:19

Hi there
I haven't read all of the responses so apologies if some of this has been posted already.

If you want to get involved, I'd suggest joining Fawcett or Object or both. In Bristol, we have a local Fawcett group. Devon does as well. I'm not sure about anywhere else.

Object also do a lot of stuff on all the above.
You can join the Facebook group or their yahoo forum to keep up to date with what's going on.

I'd also recommend UK Feminista for people to hook up with groups in their area.

There's loads going on - you just need to find out who to hook up with.

Again, sorry if this has all been posted before!

National Fawcett website

Object website

UK Feminista website

In Bristol, there is also the Bristol Feminist Network. There are probably similar groups in your towns/cities.

TheBossofMe · 01/10/2010 09:47

If the site does get up and running, give me a shout and I can help with any marketing strategy stuff - saw someone posting earlier about Tube Cards - lots of ideas about how site can be publicised, optimised etc at little to no cost.

KittyTwoShoes · 01/10/2010 19:38

Exactly, Elephants. But I think we can do it. We have to try, at least, and I think this is a good way of starting.

Thanks for the offers of help, that's great :o

Does anyone mind if I make a start on a blog, then?

hocuspontas · 01/10/2010 19:51

Anyone in London might be interested in this conference organised by the London Feminist Network.

Apologies if I'm repeating what someone else has already said!

chocolatestar · 01/10/2010 20:10

I think you should go for it, I don't know how blogs work to be honest but you have to get started somewhere.

KittyTwoShoes · 01/10/2010 20:17

Thanks hocus! I think there are quite a lot of people going to that here, scout around for them. I wish I could go, but I have to be at my cousin's christening.

Indeed, chocolatestar. I'll make a start anyway, if anyone objects speak now etc etc Wink

ElephantsAndMiasmas · 01/10/2010 22:40

Yes please Kitty. StayFrosty and HerBea have been posting some amazing stuff on the end of the cognitive dissonance thread (which to warn you has become another rape discussion thread). You could always PM them to ask if you could copy and paste some of what they've written (or anyone) if you don't want to write the whole blog yourself :)

Hocus - lots of us are going, 2 secs I'll post a link to the thread.

ElephantsAndMiasmas · 01/10/2010 22:41

Feminism in London Conference Thread

KittyTwoShoes · 01/10/2010 23:15

Thanks Elephants, I'll check that out :)

ElephantsAndMiasmas · 15/03/2012 00:34

Bumping because - well, because. It's happened! Amazing.

nina17 · 12/02/2013 15:07

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

TheDoctrineOfSciAndNatureClub · 14/02/2013 22:29

Nina, I think you're unlikely to find women who don't identify as feminist in this particular subsection.

If you email MNHQ, they'll tell you the best way to get a request to MNetters for your documentary.

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