Obstetric violence is the last socially acceptable form of violence against women

[NibliaBiblia]

Just what the title says.
I was physically forced onto my back in labour. Friend of mine had her waters broken without even being told they were about to do it and then was refused a ceasearean for hours after she said she needed one. One born every minute they just tell women what's going to happen and then do it. Another woman I know was verbally coerced into giving birth on her back in stirrups. Every time someone at work is pregnant somebody asks if they're "allowed" to do xyz.
And then things like cesareans without anaesthesia, cervical exams when the woman is saying to stop, episiotomy without warning, being belittled or spoken down to I haven't heard from women I know personally but definitely do happen.
And when a woman talks about feeling traumatised or violated there's always multiple people popping up to say that's normal, she should count her blessings, she should be grateful, etc.

I was given a cs without adequate anaesthetic which I said about at the time and was only taken seriously when I started screaming down the theatre, so yes it does happen. In fact in my debrief they called it ‘bubbles’ where the anaesthetic doesn’t take and I was apparently unfortunate that the bubble where mine didn’t take was where they cut me open. I’ve seen many women talk about this, it’s hardly a made up non-problem and comes from the viewpoint that when you are giving birth you cease to be a person and become a vessel for having a baby. I don’t know anything about the op but this is the feminism chat area of the forum and I’m appalled that posters would instantly say someone is saying bullshit when they talk about things that have happened to them.

I found the experience of giving birth traumatic due to some of the midwives involved, they were disrespectful, unprofessional and unkind. I had a lot of pain that was not taken seriously enough. I hear you OP. There should be higher standards at this time when a woman is so very vulnerable. Men absolutely would not tolerate this kind of treatment, nobody should have to.

Agreed

Agreed

This absolutely! Of course there will be occasions when women have not received the best care possible, but the OP is speculating in the worst possible way. Rumour and supposition.
I was traumatised and suffered PND for many months following my DD1s delivery, but at no point was this down to any of the staff I came into contact with.

Yes, using the correct terminology is vital. However, not all birth trauma is due to violence against women. I’d hazard that the vast majority isn’t.

All this used to happen in the 1970s. I cannot understand why it is still acceptable all these years later.

That was a very specific issue and is incredibly rare. You’re just scaremongering now.

All of what?

Womens pain being dismissed and ignored. Women being spoken down to and belittled by the people who are supposed to be caring for them. Medical procedures being forced on women or done to them without their consent. Procedures being done without women's knowledge.
And when they report what happened, their reports being disbelieved, dismissed, minimised, blamed on them.

I had a horrible time in my first birth - being pinned down, lied to, stuff done without my consent. Second birth was at home but with NHS midwives who waited until my doula went for a wee to break my waters without consent, and then after the birth gave me the injection that I said I didn't want, saying 'I've drawn it up now, I'm doing it."
My other births were with an independent midwife and quite frankly that's how all antenatal, birth and post natal experiences should be. Woman centred care.

I was also given a cervical sweep without any discussion. In fact it was 15 years later that I first heard of one and realised that was what was done to me. The pain! I dug my heels down and nearly came off the end of the bed! The old doc gave the nurse a wink and said 'I don't think we'll end up needing that appointment for a induction (planned for a few days later). And I asked for an epidural after about 28 hours of labour as was quite brusquely told that there wasn't time now - I should have asked for one when I first came down to the labour ward 5 hours earlier and then I went on for another 8 hours!

My sister gave birth on a stretcher in the maternity corridor as there weren’t enough beds. She was provided with no pain relief whatsoever.

She’d been asking for gas and air, by the time it got to her the canister was empty! She asked them to get another one and the midwife said it’s too late now as baby was crowning. They poured cold water over her vagina to help with the burning sensation.

What pain relief did you have during childbirth? A bottle of Evian.

If that’s not severe medical neglect I don’t know what is.

Have you ever been a patient in any other context? I think a lot of maternity trauma is the shock of not being in control of your body for the first ever time, combined with the fact you've been led to believe it's going to be magical.

People are not expecting fluffy loveliness when they have a colonoscopy/appendectomy/dislocated shoulder put back in.... but they are hardly nice experiences. The only ward that expects bliss and patient control is maternity and I'm not sure it's the experience, rather than the expectations that are to blame for the mismatch. We say "as long as it's healthy" while pregnant, we need to match our actions to that and do everything to save mum and baby.

I think maternity staff are nearly all doing their absolute best to get good outcomes for mother and baby.

This thread is disgusting and I can’t believe that I posted my actual experience of a thing happening and there is post after post saying this thing never happens and even if it did everyone is trying their best. Expecting not to be operated on without adequate anaesthetic is not the same as expecting sunshine and rainbows and the baby to pop out in time for tea. The dehumanising way women who experience birth trauma are being discussed here is a disgrace.

I think maternity staff are nearly all doing their absolute best to get good outcomes for mother and baby.

The road to hell is paved with good intentions.

Some of the examples given in this thread are not explained away by your theory, which I find quite offensive. I don’t know a single woman who expected childbirth to be “fluffy loveliness”.

You’re proving OP point about being dismissed, minimised and blamed. It’s your fault you had a traumatic birth experience because your expectations were too high?

I don’t think being provided with adequate pain relief or not wanting procedures carried out without consent is asking for the moon.

Like I said, the last socially acceptable form of violence against women.
Thank you for sharing. It's not easy to do so when you get responses like the ones here, but I think it's important. Talking about it and making clear that it happens and it's unacceptable will hopefully stop it from happening to other women in the future.
You shouldn't have had to start screaming before they listened to you.

There is absolutely poor care within maternity. I received atrocious dangerous care with no1. No2 was better. BUT to call it obstetric violence is insulting to those who have experienced actual VAWG, in my opinion. Genuine assault in a medical setting can be reported to the police, and to the GMC or NMC.

I gave birth abroad with my eldest and they did things to me that I dont think they do in the UK. One was extreme fundal pressure while I was lying on the bed. Two doctors taking it in turns to basically hammer my bump like they were doing chest compressions. It was painful and frightening. Another was insisting that they do a cervical check in the middle of a contraction. That was excruciating. Afterwards I told a UK midwife what happened and she told me it had been assault. I don't know. I do know that I was absolutely traumatised by it for years (among other aspects of the birth).

I wonder how the experiences of those who had private midwives, or doulas compares with those who didn’t? I had a home birth with a private midwife, and seemed to be the only mum at the local mother & toddler group who hadn’t had some horrific experiences

I profoundly disagree - I had my appendix and my gallbladder removed in the years immediately leading up to pregnancy and also had another hospital admission for biliary colic before the second removal, and the experience was massively different.

None of the experiences were pleasant or fun - they all involved acute pain, surgery, vomit etc. However in the general hospital I was kept informed of everything being considered or scheduled for me, I was never patronised, and most crucially, I was given full effective pain relief both before and after the operations without even having to ask.

I assumed labour would be similar, and was absolutely shocked at the total lack of respect for the female patients and the absolute gaslighting, outright lying and victim-blaming over pain relief. I was booked for a C-section a few days after I went into labour naturally because my baby was breech and the consultant's opinion was that he would not exit in the usual way, but my partner had to fight over several hours to get me access to one over midwives determined to "give me a chance" (to die in childbirth, or have both of us sustain lifechanging disabilities) meaning that in the end the section was emergency and more complex than it would have been.

That was the traumatic mismatch of expectation.

Unless really you want a trip down memory lane and play a form of Russian roulette with your own life and that of your unborn child, their priorities seem fairly well aligned to what I imagine almost all families-to-be desire.

I just looked up ‘cervical sweep’ - every reference just says ‘sweep a gloved finger… to separate the membranes’ So does this basically mean tearing the membrane of the amniotic sac free of the cervix???

Pretty good diagram here: https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/treatments/21900-membrane-sweep

That’s shocking, how dare they be concerned whether or not your baby is alive. Monsters!