69. Chutney
In which the stranger brings her own fork…
The gerbil that nobody knew looked expectantly at Gerbera, who stood aside and waved her arms to indicate that the gerbil should enter. Gerbera was about to blow her whistle when she decided against it and let the whistle fall from her lips.
Gasket and Girdle looked up as the gerbil walked in.
“It’s everybody’s birthday,” said Gadget, and unwrapped the cake she had just finished wrapping.
“Then I suppose it must be mine as well,” said the gerbil.
“It is,” said Gadget, and cut her a slice.
Gasket looked at the good teapot, which she had just finished washing and drying, and filled the kettle again.
The gerbil sat at the table nearest the door. She unbuttoned her gloves one by one then peeled them off and laid them side by side on the table. Then she began to remove her coat, undoing every one of a great many small buttons before she took it off. She looked up at the banner.
“Elcome,” she said.
“There wasn’t room for the W,” said Girdle. “That’s it there.”
“How sensible to keep it.”
She ate the cake with a fork. Gadget had not given her a fork. It had come out of her own coat pocket.
“Are you new?” asked Girdle.
“Not at all.”
“I haven’t seen you before.”
“No,” said the gerbil. “You haven’t.”
Girdle added one to the number of cups.
“What’s your name?” asked Gadget.
“Gloriana Gräfin.”
“That begins with a G,” said Girdle.
“It does.”
Gasket, Girdle and Gadget nodded at one another.
“Grafin,” said Girdle, trying it.
“Gräfin,” said Gloriana Gräfin.
“Grayfin,” said Girdle.
“Very nearly.”
“And what brings you here today?” asked Gadget.
There was a pause as Gasket poured tea from the good teapot and set down the cup and a milk jug. Gloriana Gräfin did not take milk. She looked along the shelf behind the bar at the jars.
“Is there chutney?”
“With cake?” asked Gadget.
“With cake,” replied Gloriana Gräfin.
The kitchen hatch opened before anyone could answer, and a dish of apricot chutney came through it, followed by Gourmet’s face.
Gloriana Gräfin took a little on the end of her fork. “Apricot,” she said. “And clove. A touch too much clove.”
“It’s the right amount of clove,” said Gourmet, and shut the hatch.
Gloriana Gräfin put a generous spoonful of chutney next to her cake. Then she scooped a little chutney onto the fork before turning it sideways to cut herself a mouthful of cake. She continued to load her fork with chutney and cake as Gasket, Gadget and Girdle looked on with fascination. Eventually Gloriana Gräfin finished her slice and laid the fork across the plate. Then she looked further along the bar, past the jars and the till, to the box with the hinged lid.
“Vesper Gold Monastery Helianthus,” she said.
“How do you know that?” asked Girdle.
“It’s a very distinctive box.”
“We’re only allowed them on special occasions,” said Gasket.
“Quite right. They’re wasted on ordinary ones.”
At the far end of the long table @AngleofRepose looked up from her typing. “I believe Gadget asked you why you’re here,” she said. “And I don’t believe I heard a reply.”
Gloriana Gräfin looked calmly at Angle. “As I said, I was told it’s somebody’s birthday. But it’s very quiet for a birthday party,” she said. “Where is everybody?”
“Windows,” said Girdle.
“What is so important about windows that would make the patrons and gerbils leave their own birthday party?” asked Gloriana Gräfin.
Angle closed the laptop. “Girdle,” she said.
Girdle looked at Angle, and then at the visitor. “That’s all,” said Girdle.
“How very mysterious,” said Gloriana Gräfin.
“Would you like another slice of cake for later?” asked Gadget quickly.
“I’ll take one for the journey, and a jar of the apricot chutney as well.”
Gadget wrapped a slice of cake. Gourmet opened the hatch and a small jar of chutney was handed to Gasket. Gloriana Gräfin put the cake and chutney in her coat pocket, in the same pocket the fork had come from, and then pocketed the fork as well.
She stood up and put on her coat, and did up every one of the small buttons, starting at the bottom. She pulled on her gloves and buttoned them up too. Then she took a card from the inside of one glove and laid it on the bar beside the W.
“Do tell them I called,” she said. “And thank you for the birthday cake.” And with that Gloriana Gräfin left the Bluestocking. As the door shut behind her, Girdle took one away from the number of cups.
Gasket cut a corner off the cake, spooned a little apricot chutney beside it and ate both on one forkful. Gadget watched her chew.
“Well?” said Gadget.
“A touch too much clove,” said Gasket.
The kitchen hatch opened an inch and shut again.
Gadget cut herself a slice of cake and added a teaspoon of chutney. She ate both standing up, then took another bite.
“It’s very good,” she said. “I don’t like that it’s very good.”
“No,” said Gasket.
Gadget cut a second slice, added the chutney and offered it to Girdle.
Angle stood up from the long table, walked over to the bar, and picked up the card. It was cream and heavy, and the lettering on it was raised.
It said Gloriana Gräfin.
Underneath, in smaller letters, it said The Margrave Foundation.
https://myrtlelion.substack.com/p/69-chutney