‘I was an ultra-Orthodox Jewish wife living a secret life as a lesbian’

[IwantToRetire]

... It was young motherhood that opened up another new link to the outside world – via Mumsnet. Internet use was deemed irreligious by Haredi leaders, and was permitted only with strict filters and for practical matters, such as planning family travel. Especially sinful was accessing non-Jewish ideas, but Fletcher did just that.

On Mumsnet, she says: “I discovered other versions of women’s lives.” There was also anonymity. One day, Fletcher typed: “Does anyone else feel like sex is a duty?” adding, “It’s just that I’m gay.” It was her first public admission.

She already had a sisterhood within her own community. “Women looked after each other,” she says. But social norms placed constraints on those friendships. Some topics felt out of bounds – sex being one of them. ...

Full article at https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2026/03/25/ultra-orthodox-jewish-wife-living-secret-life-lesbian/

Can also be read at https://archive.is/OvGtk

Thanks OP that was fascinating. Wonder if her original post is still around …

I started reading it just because it seemed so intriguing, and then came on the bit about mumsnet!

I probably shouldn't have made that the OP but thought it was so nice to hear about something positive.

And an example of how important it is, even if only online, to have a shared platform for women to ask questions of each other, and share help.

Such as taking the step to come out as a lesbian.

But back to the whole story, also reassuring to hear that within the Haredi community, which in the press is nearly always shown as rigid and disregarding women's rights, that she hasn't totally been rejected.