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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Youth Hostels Association placing men in women's dorms.

37 replies

ArabellaSaurus · 29/09/2025 10:24

The YHA are apparently determined to put men into female-only dorms.

Trans identifying man Debbie Hayton booked in July 2025:

'On July 16, YHA customer services told me that,
‘You are welcome to stay in our female dormitory, as you are a woman. We split our dorms by gender, and not sex, so our guests can stay in the room they assign themselves with.’
...

'If any guest does not want to stay in a dorm with any other guest, we offer private rooms… We consulted our solicitors while developing the policy to ensure that it was informed by and compliant with law. We consulted other organisations including the NSPCC, Scouts, Mermaids and Gendered Intelligence on different aspects of the policy. We have also taken advice from the Equality and Human Rights Commission. Our policy was considered and approved by our Board of Trustees… We sought legal advice from our solicitors following the Supreme Court ruling, which indicated that no changes to our policy were needed, pending the final updated Code of Practice for services, public functions and associations from the Equality and Human Rights Commission, which we now await.’

https://www.spectator.co.uk/article/why-is-the-yha-allowing-males-to-stay-in-womens-dorms/

https://archive.ph/mD9Ce#selection-1807.0-1807.772

Thread from 2019;

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/womens_rights/3662983-Shocked-by-YHA-transgender-policy-wording

So they appear to be breaking the law.

https://www.yha.org.uk/contact-us

Why is the YHA allowing males to stay in women’s dorms?

On April 16, the Supreme Court ruled that the meaning of the terms  ‘sex’, ‘man’ and ‘woman’ in the Equality Act refer to biology. More than three months later, you might think that the Youth Hostels Association (YHA) – an organisation that provides si...

https://www.spectator.co.uk/article/why-is-the-yha-allowing-males-to-stay-in-womens-dorms/

OP posts:
ArabellaSaurus · 29/09/2025 10:25

A recent thread that I'd missed!

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/womens_rights/5391891-youth-hostels

OP posts:
ArabellaSaurus · 29/09/2025 10:27

For comparison, Hostelling Scotland:

https://www.hostellingscotland.org.uk/our-approach-to-inclusion/

'Hostelling Scotland is an organisation open to all and we treat all our guests with respect and dignity.
Our number one priority is the safety, privacy and comfort of everyone.

We provide guests with a flexible choice of shared accommodation, private and family rooms. It is important to stress that all of our hostels provide female-only and male-only accommodation.

Hostelling Scotland recognises that gender presentation is a complex issue but we are confident that our accommodation offers maximum safety, privacy and peace of mind for all our guests.
We welcome around 380,000 people each year who value our sensitive approach to their needs.'

How refreshing!

OP posts:
OP posts:
BaronessEllarawrosaurus · 29/09/2025 10:29

Unfortunately they are not given an exemption to segregate by gender so someone should sue them for discrimination or would they allow any man to go sleep in the women's dorms?

Unfortunately I myself can not stay with the yha as I don't claim any gender so not entitled to sleep anywhere.

slippedawaylikeabottleofwine · 29/09/2025 10:30

This is one of the reasons I won’t stay in a hostel. You can’t guarantee your safety.

IwantToRetire · 29/09/2025 18:47

It will depend on how they advertise this.

If they use the word woman or women then they are clearly in breach of the Supreme Court ruling. And would have been in the past if they advertised it under the EA and quoted the SSE.

If they somehow advertise it as though who a female gender identity, it might be different.

Just a bit surprised they do ackowledge that some women may not want this and offer a single room. Can think of other organisations who would have said accept this or dont use our service.

Shedmistress · 29/09/2025 18:50

Hayton wrote the policy that allowed men in female spaces at schools and this has spread across any agency that takes kids so Debbie you wing nut, its because of you. Which you are more than aware of. Still won't apologise though will you, or work to erase this policy in schools.

PauliesWalnuts · 29/09/2025 20:53

i’ve never ever been able to book a single room in a YHA - they are like hens teeth. Plus over Covid they’ve switched to dynamic pricing meaning that sometimes it’s more expensive than a Premier Lodge.

deadpan · 29/09/2025 21:12

If you're thick enough to consult Mermaids there is no hope.

deadpan · 29/09/2025 21:12

If you're thick enough to consult Mermaids there is no hope.

tobee · 29/09/2025 21:28

Ditto Gendered Intelligence

InSlovakiaTheCapitalOfCourseIsBratislava · 29/09/2025 21:41

Stick to Scotland
single sex and better scenery (no promises about the weather)

ArabellaSaurus · 29/09/2025 22:07

InSlovakiaTheCapitalOfCourseIsBratislava · 29/09/2025 21:41

Stick to Scotland
single sex and better scenery (no promises about the weather)

Thanks, it seems, to a dedicated ManFriday campaigner ...

OP posts:
InSlovakiaTheCapitalOfCourseIsBratislava · 29/09/2025 22:53

I think something that gets missed is how uncomfortable men can be sharing a dormitory with women. My sister and I were in a six bed female dormitory in torridon plus a couple of other women and because the hostel was very full they asked us if we minded if a man came in. Sure, fine, whatever. Not ideal but nor was camping in that weather and at least they asked. He was horrified and so upset and ill at ease I felt bad for him

Keenovay · 30/09/2025 01:11

InSlovakiaTheCapitalOfCourseIsBratislava · 29/09/2025 22:53

I think something that gets missed is how uncomfortable men can be sharing a dormitory with women. My sister and I were in a six bed female dormitory in torridon plus a couple of other women and because the hostel was very full they asked us if we minded if a man came in. Sure, fine, whatever. Not ideal but nor was camping in that weather and at least they asked. He was horrified and so upset and ill at ease I felt bad for him

We were put in the same position in a SYHA 8-bed female dorm last year because the hostel overbooked. Male half of a hetero couple. Hostel asked if we minded him joining us and I and my friends said that in fact, yes, we did. I was irritated at being put in that position, frankly. They must have sorted some other solution because he didn't sleep in our dorm. His girlfriend was a bit put out, but it wasn't about him personally, it's about dignity and being about to let your guard down in an all-female space.

JellySaurus · 30/09/2025 06:15

IwantToRetire · 29/09/2025 18:47

It will depend on how they advertise this.

If they use the word woman or women then they are clearly in breach of the Supreme Court ruling. And would have been in the past if they advertised it under the EA and quoted the SSE.

If they somehow advertise it as though who a female gender identity, it might be different.

Just a bit surprised they do ackowledge that some women may not want this and offer a single room. Can think of other organisations who would have said accept this or dont use our service.

Dormitories are services where segregation by sex is a reasonable and proportionate means of achieving a legitimate objective. Gender identity is not a Protected Characteristic, so advertising that they segregate by gender, not sex, and then offering a lesser service to women, is surely illegal. It’s a lesser service because if women (or men, for that matter) want or need a single-sex room they must pay a premium to access the service. This policy also discriminates against religious people, if their faith bars them from sharing spaces with the opposite sex. And regardless whether we disagree with that position, faith is another Protected Characteristic.

They consulted organisations that follow Stonelaw, not UK law.

StrongLikeMamma · 30/09/2025 06:23

Ffs

Tortelliniortortelloni · 30/09/2025 06:40

I once stayed in a hostel (not yha) and it was mixed. The guy next to me was wanking all night. It was not pleasant. Ironically, I'd actually moved from the single room I'd booked there because I didn't feel safe as it was apart from the main building with a feeble lock. I would like to start hostelling again but this really puts me off.

PauliesWalnuts · 30/09/2025 08:27

I once went on a trip (not organised by me) where we had to stay in a refugio in the Sierra Nevada that was mixed - bathrooms, bedrooms, the lot. I know Europeans can be a bit more free and easy with the whole naturist thing but it was a nightmare. Plus I never want to be in that close a proximity to a late 50’s constipated man having a shit ever ever again.

Bobbymoore123 · 30/09/2025 10:17

BaronessEllarawrosaurus · 29/09/2025 10:29

Unfortunately they are not given an exemption to segregate by gender so someone should sue them for discrimination or would they allow any man to go sleep in the women's dorms?

Unfortunately I myself can not stay with the yha as I don't claim any gender so not entitled to sleep anywhere.

You literally have a gendered title as a username. Titles (like pronouns 😨) are often gendered signifiers and are as much part of societal gender as clothes or changing rooms or sexist expectations or anything else that is not pure biology, gender is how human society has learned to signify and perform biology. It is sensible to be think critically about gender, our current patriarchal society is a consequence of gender, however that is not the same thing as rejecting gender entirely.

Sorry for the rant but the way people bandy about the concept of being gender critical or rejecting gender while clearly not understanding what gender is or what any of that means is frustrating, I'd rather people at least be conscientiously hurtful than ignorantly as many people here are now.

BettyBooper · 30/09/2025 10:24

Bobbymoore123 · 30/09/2025 10:17

You literally have a gendered title as a username. Titles (like pronouns 😨) are often gendered signifiers and are as much part of societal gender as clothes or changing rooms or sexist expectations or anything else that is not pure biology, gender is how human society has learned to signify and perform biology. It is sensible to be think critically about gender, our current patriarchal society is a consequence of gender, however that is not the same thing as rejecting gender entirely.

Sorry for the rant but the way people bandy about the concept of being gender critical or rejecting gender while clearly not understanding what gender is or what any of that means is frustrating, I'd rather people at least be conscientiously hurtful than ignorantly as many people here are now.

Edited

Gosh! That was quite the scold!

I wonder, did the 'gender' of the 'scoldee' influence your scolding decision?

BaronessEllarawrosaurus · 30/09/2025 10:39

Actually the title is sex based and has nothing to do with gender. See I refuse to submit to the gendered expectations placed on me due to my sex, I don't however refuse to acknowledge my sex, I just don't let it define me.

Edited to add:

Gender is a crock of shit, it's a word that's used to put women in their place. I just refuse to comply. I acknowledge biological differences between the sexes but that's on a biological reality.

notacooldad · 30/09/2025 10:42

This is one of the reasons I won’t stay in a hostel. You can’t guarantee your safety.
They usually have single rooms as well as dorms.

CHowell · 30/09/2025 10:45

PauliesWalnuts · 29/09/2025 20:53

i’ve never ever been able to book a single room in a YHA - they are like hens teeth. Plus over Covid they’ve switched to dynamic pricing meaning that sometimes it’s more expensive than a Premier Lodge.

I’ve often booked three or four nights in a room for 2 as a single occupant, but months in advance during the week, out of school terms with 25% off. The dynamic pricing will price all but the most popular YHAs out of existence.

bloodredfeaturewall · 30/09/2025 10:48

notacooldad · 30/09/2025 10:42

This is one of the reasons I won’t stay in a hostel. You can’t guarantee your safety.
They usually have single rooms as well as dorms.

which cost more than a bed in dorms...

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