I was manning a stand at a careers day this week. A teen came up to chat, and the first thing they said was ‘hi, I’m trans, and I just want to know, is this a sector where I’d be treated respectfully, or?’
First thing, before they even opened their mouth, it was clear to me that this was someone with something to say. They just stood out by their need to be heard.
Clearly a boy, 16-17, 5’10-11, wearing a uniform, stubbly, wearing a cap, bloke-y looking. A bit quirky.
My heart sank. He was on his own. Everyone else was in a group of 3-4. Clearly a kid without a friend.
I introduced myself; he told me his name was Melanie.
The fact that his very first question was about his trans acceptance-ness - not about whether he was interested in x sector to work in - made me feel ‘Jesus, this is what you’ve defined yourself by’: I’m trans, not ‘I’m interested in mechanics/ engineering/ history/ being a chef.’
The colleague I was with swiftly moved to reassure him, with anecdotes of trans people she knows who work in this field.
I was just left with this feeling - you’ve latched onto this thing to create a new person for yourself. You’re not a girl; you’re just a lost boy. I can’t help you be a girl. Please don’t think this is your key to happiness.
Poor kid. Poor boy. Thinking that reinventing himself as Melanie was going to gift him acceptance.