"we don't need to rethink our goals, but if we adopt a more moderate tone we might do better at bringing people with us"
I'm conflicted in how I think about this. Across the West governments and political parties are facing a crisis of legitimacy because major civic, economic and governing institutions lack accountability to popular opinion. This is typified by the trans debate. The stability and effectiveness of liberal democracy depends on addressing this crisis, which means radically opening up the popular debate on a number of issues, and raising the level of intellectual honesty and the coherence of arguments made. In that sense the above sentiment would be a good thing for democracy.
Unfortunately, the NYT and especially McBride aren't making the case out of democratic principles. Instead, all the voices calling for moderation accept the notion that trans rights are the next great civil rights cause and the natural trajectory of that is enshrining TWAW into unchallengable civil rights code. So, when they argue for 'debate', they are equating GC people with supporters of Jim Crow -- that is GI's opposition are the equivalent of immoral racists, but like the racists of old, in part you win by protesting and enacting legislation and in part by engaging in productive dialog to win them over.
But of course, the GC argument is that the status quo has already gone too far and should be rolled back, or rather re-framed, that in fact TW should be treated categorically as males, that transition of children must be an absolute last resort (or forbidden outright), that it goes without saying that women's sports should be restricted to biological women. Trans people remain a protected category under law, of course, in the UK and US. But it should not be seen as a valid identity to be affirmed by medical intervention but a manifestation of serious psychological distress for which all attempts to alleviate it through non-medical treatment should be tried first.
Given how far gender ideology has out-run the sex realist position (and popular opinion) the conclusion to be drawn is that, in fact, past TA tactics were a marked success, especially the aggressive bullying and social media censorship. Had TAs engaged in a pluralistic, democratic debate they would not have achieved as much. Pivoting to open robust debate on the premise that it will help TAs achieve their goals would seem to be a misreading of the situation entirely. The only way the center-left can escape from it's current vortex of public contempt regarding the issue is to acknowledge that they might actually have been fundamentally wrong about the nature of trans rights, and the reason they were wrong is because of the authoritarian, anti-democratic, anti-free-speech tendency of the left activist class which locked them into an indefensible position without public vetting. That realization seems a long way off.