I am with you, though not so much confused as cross.
When my grandmother was a child, if a little boy expressed interest in something girly, he would probably be taken out behind the woodshed to have it beaten out of him. Young girls could get away with being Tomboys sometimes, but were, in general, expected to outgrow that. That is, if you stepped out of the box allocated to your sex, you were summarily put back in.
When I was a child (70s/80s), there was a huge push to get rid of the boxes. Women could be firemen and builders, men could grow their hair long and wear makeup. It was all about “gender nonconformity” - but critically, everyone stayed the same sex. That was important, because wearing a dress as a man was the thing that was sticking it to the old, stuffy, gender norms.
Transgenderism is so regressive in this regard. It is back to putting people in boxes - but this time, instead of behaviour and dress code boxes based on your sex, they are “sex” boxes based on your behaviour and dress code. If you are a girl and you don’t want to wear makeup or show off your boobs, then you must actually be a man. If you’re a man and you like pink and flower arranging, then you’re actually a woman. Why?!? We worked so hard to get rid of those effing boxes - why do you want to get back into them?
Cross.