Man at the gym imposing advice on me

[Heylo]

What the hell is wrong with men? If they’re not smashing up statues of feminist heroes in London or terrorising women who dare meet up without them they make a beeline for us in the gym.

I was just at the gym trying to move a screw on a device and the guy next to me said he’d do it. I said it’s ok I got it and then he went to do it anyway, I said to him thanks but I need to learn how to do it for next time.

Then a couple of minutes later as I was pulling the cable lead on the weight he started talking to me again. I took off my headphones stopped my lifting an said sorry what did you say?

Then he said ‘you should do it the other way ‘ (there’s two ways to stretch a rotator cuff muscle on a cable machine, I do it a particular way to work the muscle a particular way). And he kept talking and I said thanks but I’m ok and he carried on. He said no no you have to do it the other way. I said I’ve got a personal trainer I don’t need your input but thanks. Anyway as I was leaving I thought I’d say bye to make sure no feelings were hurt. He wouldn’t even look at me.

Imagine a woman interrupting you twice at the gym to offer unsolicited advice.

I wouldn’t have said bye to him.

Me either. Entitled twat. You just dented his fragile ego and he couldn't handle it.

I don't know. I've been given unsolicited advice by men at the gym, who have clearly been going much longer than me, and it's helped my progress. So I've been grateful. But I agree, I can't imagine a woman doing it, no matter how experienced they are.

I was just at the gym trying to move a screw on a device and the guy next to me said he’d do it. I said it’s ok I got it and then he went to do it anyway, I said to him thanks but I need to learn how to do it for next time.
Then a couple of minutes later as I was pulling the cable lead on the weight he started talking to me again. I took off my headphones stopped my lifting an said sorry what did you say?
Then he said ‘you should do it the other way ‘ (there’s two ways to stretch a rotator cuff muscle on a cable machine, I do it a particular way to work the muscle a particular way). And he kept talking and I said thanks but I’m ok and he carried on. He said no no you have to do it the other way. I said I’ve got a personal trainer I don’t need your input but thanks. Anyway as I was leaving I thought I’d say bye to make sure no feelings were hurt. He wouldn’t even look at me

OP wanted to move a screw, he said he’d do it, she said no, he tried to do it anyway.

Then she was pulling a cable lead in a specific way for a specific reason. He said she was doing it wrong. Then he said (again) she was doing it wrong.

As she left she said goodbye and he wouldn’t look at her.

None of that was aimed at ‘helping her progress’.

Sorry he did that. So annoying.

Yup! Classic. I had one come over completely randomly to “correct my form” on an ab crunch… I have back issues and have been advised to do it a certain way.

Men are a problem

Thanks, Random Man

A man made several attempts to get me to do a different arm stretch in the steam room. I carried on doing the one my physio had told me to do.

No idea why he thought he know what I needed without asking any questions.

It’s actually possible to have a two way conversation- ‘oh, do you have trouble with your shoulder?’. ‘Yes, torn rotator cuff.’ ‘Oh, have you tried this one, I find it helpful.’ ‘thanks but I’d better stick with my physio’s instructions.’.

That ^^ wouldn’t wind me up at all. Telling me to do it differently really does!

Yes, the majority of the time it’s the attitude they show up with, isn’t it? This superiority complex that oozes from their pores and leads them to think the ONLY reason a woman could be doing something differently is because ‘the poor little woman just knows less. I must aggressively correct her!’

@Heylo
Next time, leave your headphones on, shout: "Sorry mate, can't hear you!" and carry on as you were. I find they usually leave me alone when I do that :)

You’re right I need to think about be aware of this. Internalised misogyny, submission from societies coded messages my whole life.