How TERFs became such hateful, evil, bigots

[LadyBracknellsHandbagg]

https://commentary.steveqj.com/p/how-terfs-became-such-hateful-evil?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android&r=40jdae&triedRedirect=true

This is a good read, and the comments are very interesting, almost entirely positive for women.

Oh that's very good. Thank you

That was a good read!

I enjoyed that. And I also want to go to that wine museum.

I've had a very emotional reaction to reading this, surprisingly - I think it's like when something bad doesn't happen and your shoulders relax and the adrenaline drains ..

This was written by a man. He get's it. He explains that as a man you just don't go into women's toilets, full stop. He explains it with some humour, but also with reference to the Geneva Convention.

I think my reaction was so strong because I thought - if he can get it, in one go, 100%, why can't all men?

There's a thread on here about 'lost boys' and I commented, as I always do in these discussions, that boys deserve a vision of masculinity that involves growing up to be just a 'decent human being' [am I using 'decent' in an Hiberno-English way or is that universal understandable?] who happens to be male.

A grown man who knows he's entitled to his rights, and no more, and women are entitled to their rights, and no less. A man like SteveQJ

This is spot on. And the fact that the author so obviously gets it just highlights the fact that men who claim not to understand it are waving red flags.

Really good, clear article. He does seem broadly to get it, though his discussion in the comments suggests that he thinks transwomen who pass can use the ladies no problem and he doesn't seem to think transmen should use the ladies, so he is not quite all the way there in my view.

Great article

Ah. I didn't read the comments. Hey ho. Close but not quite there. But still streets ahead of so many men in his awareness of the issues.

The article’s good, but he turns into a right knob in the comments.

I've read through a lot of the comments, but I'm running out of attention span. I'm obviously haven't got to the bit where SteveQJ turns into a knob.
I've just read this reply by him which seems pretty spot-on - he admits that he used to think that transwomen who convincingly 'pass' weren't a problem in women's toilets, but he now believes that:

The problem is, the question of whether one passes is VERY subjective. Especially in today's insane climate. There's a whole echo chamber on social media built around convincing people who very clearly don't pass at all that they're Gal Gadot. Plus, there's the whole "trans women don't owe you femininity" wing of trans activism that claims that anybody, even a bearded rugby player with hairy shovels for hands becomes a woman the instant they say they identify as one.
But yeah, the more I think about it, maybe the problem is the whole concept of "passing."
Because the question isn't what you can fool people into believing, the question is what is actually true. Trans women are men who wish to be perceived as women. That's absolutely fine. 95% of the time the way you're perceived is all that really matters. But I think it's a huge mistake to think it's cruel or "transphobic" if there are times when they have to defer to their biology.
So my preferred solution, which some public spaces are already adopting, is to make men's toilets gender-neutral spaces where it's normal to see all "genders" using them, and leave female spaces for females.

I particularly like 'the question isn't what you can fool people into believing, the question is what is actually true'.

Another excellent article about this mess.

Oh.

I assume he'll get there eventually.

That’s exactly what I thought!

I completely agree, it’s so important for men to get it because we need them to help other men to also get it, and let’s face it, men listen to each other more than they listen to women.

They refuse to understand because they don’t want to be men. Men do understand. Hence why they stay out of women’s spaces. Literally the only people who don’t understand (or pretend not to) are trans women and their supporters.

I came here ready to report😅

Nice article, thanks!,

I admit I wasn’t sure about the thread title!

Yes, as he suggests, turning men's toilets gender neutral and leaving women's for women is SO sensible in so many ways.
I dont WANT to see men dribbling into urinals but I might decide to if the queue for the Ladies is overwhelming; the Gents, by its very nature, is likely to be emptier, so can accommodate more people of, let's say, different persuasions; men don't NEED spaces like we do (that isn't sexist, men don't have cause to hide from aggressive women); and it is far more likely that a woman needs to help a boy than a man needs to help a girl (in fact I'd question whether the latter should be allowed).