Beira’s Place & RCS warn violence in sex has been normalised

[NitroNine]

An article in The Times from 12/10/24 (Alohomora! Archived version) titled “Boys think strangling is sexy, charities warn”.

JK Rowling’s charity has warned that sexual violence has become normalised, with growing numbers of young women seeking counselling after unwanted choking during sex.
Counsellors at Beira’s Place in Edinburgh said strangulation and “breath play” had become so ubiquitous in online pornography that teenagers believed it was a routine sexual act they were expected to perform and enjoy.
Isabelle Kerr, chief executive of the charity, which supports female survivors of sexual violence, said children as young as 16 had sought help after being choked during one-night stands but she stressed women in long-term relationships had also been affected.

There is no “safe” way to strangle someone. There are “lucky” ways to do it ie you get lucky & don’t cause lasting physical harm.

Rape Crisis Scotland has warned that so-called erotic asphyxiation, sometimes dubbed breath play, often comes up in consent and pornography workshops with secondary school children.

Ah yes. And we all know what stellar quality PSHE has been of late - & of course, I’m sure that when it’s brought up in the ubiquitous LGBTQ Soc it’s dealt with totally appropriately, not an area where safeguarding being binned has put vulnerable young people at risk at all. Who doesn’t want their 11yo DD discussing sex with an 18yo lad (of any gender identity)?

Considering how normalised it has become for young boys to be watching porn at an early age, children should be informed that there is no safe way to strangle someone and sex is not a magic protection against that. PSHE has become a vital resource in properly teaching children about sex and combatting the damage from a porn-obsessed society, however I would assume based on everything else we’ve seen coming out of RCS they have not been telling kids any facts that would argue against queer/kink culture.

Oh absolutely - if it’s coming up in classes kids need telling it can’t be done safely & indeed that it’s not something that should be seen as “standard”, just as throttling people in any other context isn’t ok. My concern was, as you say, that there’s a very real risk PSHE has gone into no kink-shaming rather than the sanity that is “no fecking link for minors & let’s worry about them accessing porn & what it does to their wee minds” 🤦‍♀️

Yes, I bet they are loathe to loose any ‘sex positive’ message. They probably do not say “this is abusive and deadly and could make a person a murderer”. It is probably described as “something that gives some people pleasure as part of a consensual relationship”

Also if the students are very young and had not even heard of it, now they have it tingling in their minds.

There have been numerous threads here where mothers report that their teen girls say all the boys want to do is strangle them. Over the last 5-7 years.

Iirc one thread was entitled pretty much that.

Around a decade ago teens began to get smartphones - it became normalised.

It was around then that unlimited access to the internet via a smart phone and 3g then 4g took off.

Porn was in their pockets day and night.

Do girls also strangle boys as a trend? or is it just trendy for boys to strangle girls?

@StellaGreen like most domestic violence by all reports it’s boys attacking girls, doesn’t mean that the reverse doesn’t occasionally happen, but once again misogyny has prevailed.

There has been a lot of coverage of this issue in the past month, with many support services writing about it, as well as journalist.

See recent thread here https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/womens_rights/5183208-sexual-strangulation-has-become-popular-but-that-doesnt-mean-its-wanted

The Institute for Addressing Strangulation (IFAS) presents our Autumn 2024 Conference.

Strangulation is present across domestic abuse and sexual violence and is becoming normalised within relationships. We believe that this issue needs a whole system response.

Conference outline

We will be looking at the ‘Whole Systems Approach’ to NFS and exploring how organisations can work together to understand prevalence and save lives.

Now that VAWG has been recognised as an epidemic and a case of domestic terrorism what comes next?

We will explore the role of health – be that a paramedic, A&E doctor, GP or even midwife. How are pathways being developed and what are the challenges facing the health system?

We will also be looking at the role of the Criminal Justice System and hearing from a victim/survivor of strangulation. How is NFS represented throughout the criminal justice system and how does the system support victims? And to understand the short- and long- term effects of strangulation and to learn first–hand what is being done well, and where improvements can be made.

Confirmed speakers include Dame Vera Baird.

https://fflm.ac.uk/event/ifas-tackling-strangulation-working-together-to-save-lives/

Boys have stronger, thicker necks than girls. Girls have smaller, weaker hands than boys.

Oh absolutely - if it’s coming up in classes kids need telling it can’t be done safely & indeed that it’s not something that should be seen as “standard”

Remember that former Labour MP Loyd Russell Moyle, whose 15 year old cousin tragically died during auto erotic asphyxiation, railed at Miriam Cates and others in parliament as he wanted these "risky sex acts" to be taught about so they could be "done safely". Amazing.

Remember that former Labour MP Loyd Russell Moyle, whose 15 year old cousin tragically died during auto erotic asphyxiation, railed at Miriam Cates and others in parliament as he wanted these "risky sex acts" to be taught about so they could be "done safely". Amazing.

Alas, if you believe humans can change sex, you will presumably make the Red Queen look a rank amateur at believing impossible things 🫤