“My Imaginary Penis.” A phrase included in the writings of Audrey/Aiden Hale.

[RainWithSunnySpells]

Audrey/Aiden Hale's journal has been released.

For those that don't remember Hale is the Trans idenifying female who murdered staff and children at the Covenant School in the USA and was shot and killed at the scene.

https://tennesseestar.com/covenant-school-shooting/the-tennessee-star-releases-manifesto-left-by-transgender-covenant-school-killer-audrey-hale/tpappert/2024/09/03/
Archive link. https://archive.ph/1eOzo

Reading some of the pages, I can't help but wonder if porn has played a part in these tragic events?

Shamelessly bumping this.

I think that there is a lot to discuss that is highlighted by this case. Hale was clearly suffering from a lot of issues.

I don’t know if Audrey Hale was on cross sex hormones or not but a high doses testosterone in a woman will not be healthy either physically or mentally and she was already clearly very mentally unwell. Disassociating from your own body when you’re so mentally ill is only going to make things much much worse.
I really think wish studies should be done on the impact of wrong sex hormones on people instead of transitioning being pushed as a cure all.

I think it's very striking how many of these spree shootings in the US have been by young women who identify as men.

This is trying to downplay it but there are only 5 other female shooters, so a disproportionate amount of the female people had a trans identity.

https://www.reuters.com/article/fact-check/majority-of-us-mass-shooters-are-cis-men-not-transgender-or-non-binary-people-idUSL1N363273/

The report examined 173 attacks in the U.S. that “that resulted in harm to three or more individuals in public locations,” Justine Whelan, press secretary for the U.S. Secret Service, told Reuters via email, and “three attackers (2%) were transgender, assigned female at birth, but were known to identify as male at the time of their attacks.”
Whelan said that consistent with previous analyses of mass attacks, “nearly all of the attackers,” or 96%, in the study were male, and the remaining five attackers were female.

Males are overrepresented anyway, and it doesn't seem to be a pattern with MTFs.

Have downloaded the journal pdf and will take a look later.

Well we all know there seems to be bugger all proper medical follow up and monitoring of the effects of the experimental use of cross sex hormones.

About time there was some proper monitoring. There are valid questions about the impacts on the rest of this society of this experiment. The individuals might 'consent' (though not sure they really can given the unknowns) but the other people affected by their behaviour don't.

IIRC the authorities were very reluctant to release these journals.

From the article, I don't think that permission has been expressly given, although the first amendment right to publish is also mentioned.

We need to talk about exogenous testosterone.

I also think that looking at the effects on someone who is clearly suffering from mental health issues that have lasted for many years, of an ideology that is unteathered from reality is important. The journal does not read as though it is written by an adult.

There was clearly a lot of internal homophobia too. Hale was a lesbian who used the term 'faggot' in a derogatory way. Being a transman was transing away the gay.

Extreme fixations on certain girls/women feature (quite stalkerish), as well as anal sex using the aforementioned imaginary penis, not having sex was also a fixation, and soft toys having sex with each other (one represented Hale).

We talk about 'porn soaked men' but now I can't help but wonder about 'porn soaked women' too.

The attack was planned. Hale was a threat to others for a long time before that attack ocurred IMO.

I don't know if Hale was on Testosterone, but I agree that this is a serious issue.

Isn't it interesting how when it's a ftm person, the media has no problem "misgendering" and "dead naming" the killer? However, when it's a mtf person who commits a heinous crime they go out of their way to hide this fact and pretend that they are just a regular biological woman and anyone pointing out the truth is labelled a hateful bigot. Strange how that works

From a previous TN Star article:

“A terrible feeling to know I am nothing of the gender I was born of,” Hale wrote in the entry. She continued, “I am the most unhappy boy alive. I wish to be dead.”

Later, Hale wrote, “I will be of no use of love for any girl if I don’t have what they need: boy’s body / male gender.”

Next to these remarks, Hale illustrated the words, “Everything Hurts,” which she used repeatedly throughout the journal.

While the source of Hale’s purported discomfort is unclear, musculoskeletal pain is a possible side effect of a medication The Star learned was prescribed to Hale by staff at the Vanderbilt University Medical Center (VUMC).

In addition to musculoskeletal pain, the National Institutes of Health explains side effects for that medication, the anti-anxiety drug Buspirone, include abnormal dreams, outbursts of anger, tremors, and physical weakness.

Hale was additionally prescribed Escitalopram, better known as Lexapro, and Medical News Today explains that using the depression drug with Buspirone could “increase the risk of side effects” for both medications.

I had no idea that Hale was 28; media reporting and her own behaviour/words led me to believe that Hale was very early twenties at most.

Yes, Hale comes across as very young.

Sadly there is absolutely nothing surprising about any of this.

'Nothing surprising.'

I think Black has hit on something that is utterly depressing and completely right, and conveyed it in only two words.

Spree shooting isn't just a male crime, it's almost exclusively a male crime. Female spree shooters are almost unheard of. That's why the "I don't like Mondays" school shooting from 1979 is still remembered.

So the stats in that fact check are really interesting - while framed to say it's not a trans issue but a "cis men" issue, actually it shows that, of the handful of women who commit the crime, there's a massively disproportionate share of young women with extremely poor mental health who (have been encouraged to?) dissociate from their bodies and jack themselves up on testosterone.

Who could have guessed?

Turns out some women-who-identify-as-men identify as the absolute worse kind of men, ie mass-murderers of vulnerable victims selected at random.

Most school shooters try to kill their peers, their own classmates, Hale was a 28 year old adult who murdered 9 year olds so the killers she idolised to would probably judge her a coward & nothing like them.

While women rarely kill, when they do the victims are often children (albeit most often their own family members).

How tragically ironic that ‘Aiden’ Hale sought to emulate some of the worst male spree killers in US history but selected victims of a profile more typical of female murderers.