Asked for GC therapist was recommended TRA group

[Mermoose]

I am just really upset and needed to vent but also would appreciate any suggestions.
I have anxiety and was referred to an online CBT course. On the course you're ascribed a therapist who sends you a message once a week. When I was registering on the course I was asked which gender I most closely identify with. I wasn't comfortable sharing any personal information with the "supporter" I was given but found the course quite helpful. But I felt like I did need to see a therapist, I just needed them to be GC. I eventually worked up the courage to ask my supporter if he could suggest anyone or help me find someone like this, as mental health seems full of people who subscribe to gender identity.
He came back today and referred me to BeLonGTo, which is the Irish equivalent of Mermaids. I can't respond to him as it was his last message to me.

If you are able to contact Stella O’Malley I believe she could refer you to a gender critical therapist in Ireland.

In general, if you look at what areas therapists list as their areas of expertise you can avoid anyone who lists “identity” or “gender” then sound them out early on to see if your views are accepted.

that sounds to me like the person misunderstood you
no one in that position is going to recommend you go to an organisation that is the complete opposite of what you have asked for

I can barely believe he did it on purpose but I was very clear.

Smh. You would think somebody well versed in CBT would recognize his own cognitive errors.

He didn't understand, asked someone and got an inappropriate recommendation.

I would guess, but obviously you know that you were clear and have a better understanding of it

He’s done that on purpose. Outrageous.

I’d bet he didn’t understand. He probably thought gender critical meant critical of the idea that you have to stick to the gender you were assigned at birth or something. Most people haven’t a clue what GC means so they think if anyone mentions gender at all, it’s because they’re gender confused.

I don't think he could have misunderstood me. This is what I wrote:
I do have a question - I've dithered a lot over asking this. I do need to see a therapist but I am gender critical and because of some of the things I need to discuss, I don't think I can see a therapist who subscribes to gender identity. It seems that most therapists do - when I registered for this programme for example I was asked to say which gender I most closely identify with. I don't want someone who is a GC activist or anything, I just want someone who is roughly on the same page as me on this. I don't know how to go about finding a therapist like this.

I think you could absolutely misread this as the exact opposite of what you meant if you weren’t invested in the trans debate. “Subscribes to gender identity” could easily mean to him “thinks you should stick to your birth gender” and he might think you object to being asked your gender because you think it’s intrusive or outing. So many people I meet at work or casually think all these words and phrases, which most people don’t care about, mean the opposite of what GC people mean by them. Just explain you think he’s got the wrong end of the stick and you’d like a therapist who doesn’t support transitioning.

Wouldn't he have to have been living under a rock for the last few years not to know that?

I can't reply to him, it was his last message to me.

I agree - your comment could absolutely be read as meaning the oppoisite of what you intended, especially if someone only had a superficial understanding

I don't understand why the fact that it was his last message means you can no longer contact him? Can't you contact him through the service somehow-
"I've been referred to an organisation that doesn't meet my needs, and I need a different referral, please advise"

Can't you contact him through the service somehow

No, there's no way to contact him. The website has an emergency contact number if you're suicidal, and a technical support email, that's it.

Does it matter very much that you can’t contact him? It sounds like you’d be better off asking someone else for a good recommendation anyway, whether he misunderstood you or did it on purpose (I agree with pps that it could quite easily have been a mistake)