Baby reindeer anti woman pro trans slant

[NZadultwoman]

Watched the series this weekend and like with so many things happening today I'm struck by what I can't unseen. When you really see the narrative, you see it everywhere! Anyone else notice how the trans woman was painted "innocent" and that the "Martha" character was "guilty". And inferred that the trans woman was more of a woman than the actual woman? In fact, the writer may as well have called her Karen! I tried to confirm whether or not the plot was in line with the "true story". All I could find out was that the writer combined many different experiences to construct the plot. I wouldn't be surprised if the writer capitalized on the popularity of the pro trans anti woman element to help popularize he story. I have to admit I liked the show anyway. And I appreciate it as a reflection of our society. It's a useful looking glass me thinks

Fine, continue to speak utter fiction.

Perhaps you need to read this

https://www.mumsnet.com/i/trans-rights-moderation-policy

I find it hard to believe that anyone could credibly claim trans people are now erased and do not exist because of someone typing on an internet forum. It shows a rather odd understanding of what 'trans person' means. They are real people, not some concept.

Going back to the actual topic being discussed, I do feel that the writer has shown himself to make terrible decisions, having no boundaries, using people, and treating them awfully, which in one sense makes for more interesting TV but on the other sort of puts up this defence shield of 'hey, I never said I did the right thing, so you can't criticise me any further'.

Too many people are treating it almost as a documentary rather than a work of fiction. Fiction can still start useful discussions and express real situations so it was always going to be a massive distraction saying 'this is real, real people did this'.

The trans woman they picked is not representative of most trans women, particularly in the UK.

They used a transwomen actor to represent a transwoman and have you have an issue because, in your opinion, she is too pretty? A lot of actors are better looking than their real life counterparts.
I would also suggest that you consider whether or not your idea of what a transwoman looks like might be skewed. You may have passed quite a few in the street who are smaller and not as masculine as you think they should be and not noticed as you didn't interact with them.

I agree with you that it should have been clearer that the assault did not happen. Especially when this was billed as a true story with "Martha" so easy to find.

AGP is an obsession which drives the whole existence of transwomen
I feel like you are basing this on vocal TRAs who post on the internet. Like any other group of people transwomen are individuals with different personalities and motivation.

This is a big, big reach OP

Agreeing with the poster who said RG is maybe a bit of a sociopath.

Agree. To be fair, I dont think he came across well, nor I guess did he think he would? A very flawed person indeed.

I don't think he was trying to portray himself well or as an innocent victim. I think armchair-diagnosing him as a sociopath is a bit much but he is definitely a flawed and damaged human being.

I mean, maybe. It's definitely pure speculation. It's the interview I read with his former coworker that made me think so. He sounds like an utterly misogynist pig. And he's definitely rewritten the "truth" to make himself look better. And lied about what actually happened. So...

Around one in 20 people are sociopaths so I don't think it's 'a bit much' to suggest that someone who has repeatedly lied about a vulnerable mentally ill woman is one.

He's lied about the show being 100% emotionally true, he lied about her sexually assaulting him, he lied about her being violent, he lied about her having a criminal record, he lied about going to a lot of trouble to protect her identity.

He's also been investigated by Netflix for using the lure of fame to get intimate with a vulnerable transwoman much younger than him. He was cleared of nepotism because he lied about being able to make casting decisions, but his actions aren't exactly indicative of someone with empathy are they?

Around one in 20 people are sociopaths so I don't think it's 'a bit much' to suggest that someone who has repeatedly lied about a vulnerable mentally ill woman is one.

1 in 20! Seriously? Is sociopath the latest social contagion? Or are we diagnosing slightly annoying people as being on the sociopath spectrum?

Around 5.5% of men are potentially sociopaths. Obviously it's not the same as being a psychopath - it just means that the person has very little empathy.

Are Narcissists and Sociopaths Increasing? | Psychology Today

Thanks for the link. I remain unconvinced.

I think there's a massive tendency for unqualified people to "diagnose" people a who behave in ways we don't like. Everyone seems to have a narcissistic ex/mother in law, a friend that had to cut out because she's a sociopath etc.

@Signalbox fair enough, I'm happy to agree to disagree. I'm invested in this topic because I happen to be one of many women who has actually had a stalker in real life and it was a terrifying experience. There's no way I would have put up with him emailing me, or coming to my place of work. I instantly would have walked away from the job I loved rather than see him every day. I categorically would not have had sexual fantasies about him.

So while I understand that men can also have stalkers, I don't think they have the same experience as us. Men commit 99% of sex crimes and the majority of violent crimes. They are also a lot bigger and stronger than us, on average.

Seeing people on social media saying things like, "oh women are just as bad, look at Baby Reindeer, that's a true story," when I know he has literally made up all the stuff about Martha being violent makes me think that Gadd is not a normal person. What man in their right mind claims that a vulnerable woman sexually assaulted him when they didn't?

Can anyone suggest a kinder reason why Gadd would have made up a story where a mentally ill woman sexually assaulted him?

But the real Martha IS fat.

This is what I'm not really sure about. It seems there is no-one who has done what the Martha character has done, so to what extent/in what way is any real person "the real Martha"?

Very sorry to hear about your experience and thanks for sharing.

In terms of the diagnosis of sociopathy (and other conditions) much of the DSM is opinion based rather than fact based so that is why I’m sceptical. I recently watched a very interesting interview with Mia Hughes who wrote the WPATH files report and her account of the development of the DSM and the conditions contained within it was quite shocking.

@Signalbox I think you are absolutely right to be sceptical. Thank you for making important points.

Well it went straight over my head that the character was trans. Just had to Google it.