How to deal with everyday sexism?

[TigerOnTour]

I've recently started volunteering with a youth group and I'm really struggling to deal with old fashioned attitudes and subtle sexism. The main issues came to light in a recent residential event. Things like walking into the kitchen and asking catering volunteers to make a cup of tea and then just sitting down and waiting for it and complaining that there isn't a cooked breakfast. Everyone involved is a volunteer so it seems rude to challenge this, but we need more volunteers and this is definitely putting younger women off helping out. Most of the sexist attitudes come from the older men, but it seems to have filtered down to the younger male volunteers and some of the teenage boys who are part of the organisation.

How do I tackle this?

Call it out with sarcasm, or quit and tell them why.

Modelling strong boundaries.

Best done with a bit of humour if you can manage it.

If someone mentions tea:

'Ooh, I'd love one, thanks'.

Etc.

Tell them.
"I'm sure your not doing this deliberately but you are coming across as quite sexist when you do x. Next time feel free to just come in and pop the kettle on" bright smile.

Any come back gets met with baffled incomprehension and a reminder that everyone needs to contribute.

It's not rude to challenge it, it's rude of them to do it. I'd challenge it every time, with sarcasm. If that doesn't work I'd explain to the organiser/whoever's responsible for volunteers and outline the incidents that have occurred. Then I'd ask them to communicate to volunteers what's acceptable and what's not.

@fedupandstuck part of the issue is that everyone is a volunteer and the 'chief' volunteer is one of the main perpetrators! If I discuss it with him he's likely to say that I'm welcome to tell them this information but they're just being old fashioned and it will mean they will be less willing to volunteer with my group. I don't know how to deal with this without alienating people.

"The kettle’s over there. Would you like me to teach you how to use it?"

To the older volunteers - tell them "in a minute, I'm a bit busy right now" and then don't do it. If they ask the person next to you, say "I'm really sorry but I need person X to help me with what I'm doing" and get them not to do it either. If challenged, say "I thought it was more important that I get this [insert important task] done for the clients than us volunteers having a cuppa!"

No such politeness for the younger generations! Remind them that you're all a team of volunteers and you know they're quite capable of making everyone a cuppa 😀

I just use "what did your last servant die of" with a look on my face that indicates I'm not making them a bloody drink!

If some of the volunteers are catering volunteers then they do they catering surely?

Yes, can you clarify what the catering volunteers are meant to do? If, for example, cook lunch for everyone but people are meant to look after themselves outside of that?

I bet all the catering volunteers are female, right? Do they volunteer specifically for that, or is it automatically assigned to women? That could be your problem
If they volunteer specifically I don't see why it would put off younger women who volunteer for something else though.