Counselling for a teenager - suddenly worried

[teawamutu]

DS1 is mid/late teens and about to have some counselling for anxiety. Therapist seems to be a nice sensible woman.

However, saw the intake form she asked DS to complete and it includes pronouns.

This may well be completely standard for the industry and I have no reason to suspect gender is any part of DS's anxiety, but it started me worrying about ideology/unquestioning affirmation etc.

I can't and shouldn't be party to what DS and the therapist talk about, but would it be out of order to contact her and ask what her stance on this is in advance?

Is this the NHS or privately paid for OP?
Personally I wouldn't have any qualms about checking that therapist is not captured as she's in a very powerful position with the potential to gaslight your DS.
I'd probably ask something about clarifying (given the question about pronouns) what approach they'll take about gender identity ideology? Maybe point out that given how captured many therapists appear to be you just want to ensure that they're adopting an age appropriate and professionally neutral approach with no proselytising. I'd probably apologise in advance for asking but point out that as a parent you're trying to safeguard your child from professionals who appear to have lost their professional neutrality in favour of unthinking affirmation?
It's a tricky one but in the end your DS matters more than her feelings. And if she's a good counsellor, she'll understand - and if she's offended - then there's your answer about her lack of professionalism & level of capture?

I agree with @MrsOvertonsWindow .
Hopefully you will be reassured, but it wont hurt to ask. Certainly in the private sector clients are encouraged to ask questions and find the best approach for them.

I'm going to pinch and paraphrase this, thank you so much. It's nail on head.

It's depressing that we even have to consider that (once) good people may be so in hock to the dodgy belief that people can actually change sex. To the extent where we have to double check that our children aren't being gaslit by the very people who should be supporting them. 😡

I have been looking for someone for my DD op - she was referred to a counsellor at university and found him to be (her words) a "creepy bloke" and never went back, her friend was also referred to the same person with same outcome.
So I looked on the counselling directory - I note that qualifications listed vary, with some seeming to have many listed on their bio and some rather few, and importantly some state their pronouns (which I accept some people may find reassuring) and others don't. So I have been able to narrow it down to a couple of sensible sounding women with no pronouns and lots of experience.

If the person your DD has been referred to is via the NHS I suspect those forms are standard for the times we are living in, but you could look her up and see what she puts out about herself in the directory if she's there or wherever else she may have a presence.

www.counselling-directory.org.uk/

Sent a version of @MrsOvertonsWindow 's post and got a really nice message back.

The pronouns are on the form as a formality, and her approach is open-minded exploration, not automatically affirming or encouraging. Described as a difficult, sensitive and complex issue.

I think that sounds right, would you agree?

That's a great message. I imagine the counsellor is seeing a lot of children who are concerned about identity at the moment, so she's asked for pronouns just in case.

The counsellor's professional body is extremely likely to be wholly captured by queer theory, so the counsellor really wouldn't be able to answer you in any stronger terms without risking being reported and disciplined - all the main counselling bodies are enthusiastic proponents of the Memorandum of Understanding and heavily promote TQ+. I think the answer you got is a very good sign the counsellor is sensible.

That sounds positive @teawamutu.
It's exhausting isn't it? Having to wonder and probe whether adults working with children are using their knowledgeable professional skills or have abandoned them in favour of a dodgy ideology.

Thank goodness for mums net and the collective wisdom of women.