Nightmare in France mixed toilets

[Whattosay81]

Ive been in France for two weeks now and appalled at toilet rules here.

i have two young DD who I cannot let go to the toilets on their own anymore.

Bistro number 1, urinals, a male toilet and a female toilet. Past the urinals!!! So having to take my 8 year of and 11 year old past pissing men to access the toilet.

Restaurant number 2 - mixed sink area, 4 toilets one in male/female and baby changing, one male and one female and one blank. Took them both to the loo - had to put one in blank and one in female as baby changing was full. Then had to stop men in my rudimentary French from trying to use the blank one as my DD was in there, then having to listen to men pee etc and get my daughters out of there ASAP.

just shocked at how toilets are now mixed in France and feel I should warn you all.

Just wait till you find out about their saunas. Your pearls will be clutched SO hard.

Some replies on here are batshit. There is nothing sophisticated or admirable about providing poor public toilet facilities, and women who object to them aren't at fault.

You don't know the difference between going to a sauna (optional) and going to the loo (necessary)?

IKR? If you don't want to squat in a unisex pissoir you are an uptight, pearl clutching British prude who should have their passport revoked.

I also know the difference between walking past a urinal where you can't see a penis and naked mixed saunas.

There is also the whole side of "every country should be like the UK". We're not Americans. We can accept other cultures behave differently and don't have to meet our British standards surely?

Has their dad never taken them out alone and had to take them into the mens toilets in the UK?!

Yeah, I live here and it's pretty rank. The men also use the women's toilets even if there are separate ones. There is always usually piss all over the floor/seat.

To add, the amount of times i've seen men just pissing in the street in broad daylight is disgusting.

I remember these mixed type toilets across France years ago. I often walked past urinals to the ladies toilet in France, dating back 20 years or so. It was the first place I ever remember it and it felt so alien to what I was used to back home in England.

Infact in more recent visits I'd noticed it was less the case and more separated.

"pearl clutcher" TERF Karen

all misogyny

I find the thought of this really unpleasant, despite having used far more basic or open toilets when travelling. For example, the ladies toilet being a room full of squat toilets with a thigh-high barrier between each, no doors. Or peeing by the roadside in a place with landmines around so not a good idea to wander into the bushes.

On reflection I think the disgust I feel comes from a sense of men taking over the space, sort of marking their territory. I found it deeply uncomfortable in the few places I, as a woman, was in the minority and ushered off to a toilet (on a stop on a bus journey) whilst men just peed literally at the side of the bus, no avoiding them. When men and women had to do this in landmine country, everyone was a bit more discreet/walked up the road a bit. Any other basic toilets were always separated by sex so the openness didn't seem to matter so much, and there was no sense of men owning the space and pissing wherever they want whilst women have to squeeze in somewhere and be discreet.

In OPs example there's the same thing of men being catered for whilst women have to take what's left, and be discreet about it. Urinals and a cubicle for men, but just one cubicle for women. And women have to walk passed the urinals to access their cubicle - logically the urinals should be furthest away, then no one would have to pass them or even see them if they weren't using them.

They've always had pissoir's in more rural areas - basically outdoor mens urinals and a mixed sex stall next to it. I can't get worked up about it. I saw plenty of men pissing as a child and it hasn't scarred me.

I live in France and have done on and off since I was 20, probably about half of my time in France and half in the UK.

I wonder whether there are more sexual assaults in France compared to the UK - hard to find definitive comparable numbers as reported rates may differ significantly to actual rates.

I have been subject to more sexual harassment and uncomfortable situations in France than in the UK.

I cross country ski in the winter and men will turn to side on the track and have a pee without even pretending to find a tree.. it happens frequently in car parks, by the side of the road and the smell of urine in some urban areas is disgusting. I know people who teach their boys to pee in the garden or in park on the way home from school.

I am Irish, lived a long time in England and I find the kissing culture, an invasion of my personal space. I had a chimney sweep in my house today and he touched my back... it was a violation of my space and made me feel uncomfortable, for him, it was probably nothing. There was a bird in the house and he was probably trying to reassure me.. but he didn't touch my shoulder, it was close to my bottom.

I dislike the toilets where men and women are in close proximity, I dislike when men push up against me in the metro, I dislike when men I do not know very well, touch me.

Don't be ridiculous, men can't take their children out alone!

I've been all over France and I've seen this everywhere. Especially in small restaurants or rural public toilets. Sometimes you have to walk past the urinals before you even get to the sinks. I've done a couple of double takes thinking I've walked into the men's only to have a lady walk past me to the cubicle and sink area.

Often really rural public toilets have been squat toilets. Interesting if you're a woman wearing trousers!

Whenever driving to Germany many years ago, we would all cheer when we crossed the F/G border. Such a delight to visit a German loo, with a lady attendant who required a tip for keeping everything pristine.

ItsNotRocketSalad

I think it is pretty clear from your post that you also believe in using negative generalisations and personal attacks.

On the most part, no. Regular posters don't shame other posters for threads that fit the board's designation and who are genuine posters. But, please do continue supporting posters such as yourself who are very much inclined towards shaming posters, particularly women, who disagree with you instead of accepting that others have different opinions to you.

I might just have peed myself a bit there .😂😂😂😂

Typical tactic there. Keep showing everybody who you are.

Hilarious projection here! Just marvellous.

It's totally normal in France.

I suggest you don't go to the public swimming pool, changing rooms are unisex. Individual cubicles but the doors and walls don't go anywhere near the ceilings.

In fact changing rooms in most shops are unisex too.

There is this idea that everything on the continent is a bit more liberal and enlightened and the British are all a bit uptight but it's just very possible that women in certain parts of Europe are expected to put up with shit provision and facilities. For all kinds of reasons mixed sex toilets aren't very pleasant but the ultimate problem with them is that they provide opportunities for predators and sex pests. All the shrugging and 'So what?' about mixed-sex toilets is because the male experience is taken as universal and all the ways in which females adapt their behaviours to cope with mixed-sex facilities are invisibilised.

It certainly wasn’t like that in the Dordogne when I was there for a fortnight 28 years ago! I had two young DDs (aged 4 and 5) and every loo we visited was strictly segregated by sex. Mind you, they were mostly either in decent quality restaurants, or in tourist sites, but even the couple in cafes were fine too.

I've only been to Belgium a couple of times, and the thing I recall most about the toilets is that they were spotlessly clean and didn't smell. Even the ones at Brussels station were immaculate, and station lavs tend to be a bit grim in most places.

Do the women in France actually like this or do they just endure it?

I also find it annoying that pissoirs are an example of men being rewarded for their tendency to piss wherever they like whereas women who hold it in are required to continue holding it in. Pander to men but expect of women.