Letter to my Lib Dem MP, sent today

[PotteringPondering]

Dear .......

I’d value your thoughts on an issue that will influence how I vote at the next election. I’m a lifelong Lib Dem supporter, but feeling the party is heading in a direction I can’t support.

The issue is women’s rights and gender theory. This is often presented as transphobia, a culture-wars issue stirred up by the right. I’m hearing many voices in the Lib Dems saying people with gender critical views should be expelled from the party. This recent article from Liberal Democrat Voice is typical: .........
The writer says those who question gender theory are bigots. Ed Davey takes a strong ’transwomen are women’ line. The party line seems clear.

Liberal Voice for Women are speaking out in favour of biological sex, but they appear increasingly marginalised.

I’m centre-left and progressive in my politics, and most of the others I know who are concerned about protecting single-sex spaces for women (eg rape crisis centres, prisons and women’s sports) are progressive left-wing feminists. Most now feel politically homeless. Most say the two parties they could now never vote for are the Greens and Lib Dems, because both take their cues from the likes of Stonewall and Mermaids, ignoring women’s hard-earned sex-based rights.

Many are saying they will vote Tory, even though they hate almost everything else the party stands for, because the Tories at least use the language of women as adult human females, and the likes of Miriam Cates are speaking out in favour of women’s sex-based rights and calling out misogyny among extremist activists.

I was in a feminist meeting in Manchester last year, while 150 masked activists with loud-hailers shouted violent rhetoric about Terfs, Nazis and genocide, and tried to storm the meeting. Those inside were terrified. This past weekend the trans activist known as Sarah Jane Baker (who spent years in jail for kidnap and attempted murder), told the London Trans march, 'if you see a TERF, punch them in the f face.’ I have heard no robust condemnation of this from Lib Dems, Greens or Labour. The Metropolitan Police replied to those complaining to say there is no case to answer, even though lawyers say it was clear incitement to violence against women.

In my previous job I worked closely with a trans woman, and I believe trans-identifying people should share the normal range of human rights. This isn’t about transphobia.

But increasingly, I am hearing large numbers of people, particularly women, saying the only party they will be able to vote for at the next election are the Tories, because this feels like an issue of violence and personal safety. The Tories have been astute in spotting there are large numbers of votes at stake.

I’d value your thoughts, as they are likely to shape how I vote. I’d be happy to talk in person at any stage, or participate in any good-faith discussions locally.

Very best wishes

It's a great email but I wouldn't hold my breath for a supportive response....

Well done. I may borrow parts of it to send to local political candidates. I live in a constituency where a donkey would get in if it wore a blue rosette, so I always choose who gets my vote on the personal qualities of those standing as opposed to their political affiliation.

Great letter OP. I hope your MP puts at least a little thought and time into drafting a response. No 'both sides' shit, no 'more light, less heat'. If my MP was going to tell me to fuck off, I'd like without a side of being patronised.

You didn't do the child safeguarding stuff...? As I am sure you are aware the LibDems have had donations from a puberty blocker manufacturer.

Do you want to set up a bingo card for the reply you get OP?

I'll start with

most vulnerable
most oppressed
experiencing the most violence (no mention of evidence)
high risk of suicide (no risk of evidence being shared there either)
and no threat to women's rights (that he can see while hiding in the fridge, with his eyes closed, fingers in his ears, chanting Hail Stonewall Full of Grace, Judith Butler is with thee repeatedly to a holy medal of Izzard)

That should cover the top row.

It's a great email but sadly this is the response I expect you will get.

Would you mind if I use parts of it please OP? It’s a great letter and I’d be interested in hearing from all our party candidates - because at the moment I’m planning on voting Tory for this single reason. How has it come to this?

Yes, feel free to plunder for phrases, ideas, whatever.

Obviously this one is tailored for my Lib Dem MP, and I'd have chosen other examples if they'd been Labour or Green.

I'd have taken a different tack if I wanted assurances from a sitting Tory MP. The obvious one being the strong chance of deselection, given the state of the polls, and a possible lifeline being the support of women constituents if you gain their trust on sex-based rights.

I don't know whether to laugh or cry. But yes.

Thank you 😊

Yes, I agree with you. As a centre left, retired, atheist, scientist feminist, I feel completely politically homeless. I’ve never voted Tory in my life, but feel I might have to. I emailed Ed Davey and Keir Starmer on this topic with no response. My local female Tory MP mailed me straight back and was very supportive of biological women. The Communist Party seems to be the only one that isn’t captured by this nonsense.
As I’m not working and my sons left school years ago, I didn’t realise how deeply embedded this gender woo has become. It was only when I was in hospital a couple of years ago and heard nurses talking about how worried they were that the penny dropped. I suspect many of us retired females, don’t realise either. But we are a generation that pushed for abortion rights, equal pay etc so we’re used to a fight.
I’m planning on setting up a donation to Sex Matters - is that the most useful organisation to support?

I wrote a similar letter to out LibDem MP and got back a lukewarm response along the lines of “if you feel like that we need to agree to disagree”.

Oops, I don't mean deselection, do I? That's what the party does. I mean being voted out.

When I wrote to the LibDems in a similar fashion some years ago I got a reply…. Not a very satisfying one, so I wrote again and got exactly the same paragraphs, but in a different order. I hope you get a better response OP, we definitely deserve some actual explanations!

Yep that looks like the reply I got last time I bothered to raise concerns with my Lib Dem MP.

Well done. My mum, a lifelong Liberal supporter and canvasser, was told she was a bigot by a local LibDem activist because she didn't want to give her pronouns so I wouldn't hold my breath!

I promised I'd report back when I received a reply from my Lib Dem MP. Here it is, in full:

All women have the right to live their lives in safety and dignity. Violence against women and girls is far too prevalent in our society and on the rise, both in public spaces but also behind closed doors at home. I am appalled by the low conviction rates for rape and sexual assault. Tragic headlines in recent years only reinforce how much we all need to work together as a society to tackle sexual harassment and violence by men against women, starting by making misogyny a hate crime. I am proud that Liberal Democrats have been at the forefront of this campaign in Parliament.

I am concerned that the behaviour of predatory men is being confused with the journey and experiences of trans women in the discussion around safe spaces. As a woman and the mother of a young daughter, I am very clear that single-sex safe spaces for women are essential and must be protected. I also recognise that trans women have the right to dignity and safety too and will need to be able to access toilets, changing rooms and other single-sex facilities when going about their daily lives.

We cannot exclude trans people from society or force trans women to use single-sex facilities for men because of our concerns about predatory men. The law in our country has respected people’s right to self-identify for twenty years now, with safeguards to avoid abuse. The Equality Act 2010 already entitled trans women to use women’s facilities and this happens all the time, without many of us being aware. There is no evidence that predatory men have abused the Equality Act to gain access to women’s spaces. Indeed, predatory men wishing to access a ladies’ loo or shop changing room do not need to go through any process to do so – these spaces are not policed and nor could they practically be, without checking inside women’s underwear which would be a gross violation of all women’s rights.

In the case of prisons, refuges and hospital wards, entry for all people – regardless of gender – is based on a risk assessment. Additionally, the Equality Act includes provisions allowing single-sex services to exclude or restrict access to people because they are trans, as long as it is justified as a proportionate means of achieving a legitimate aim. These are often very difficult and sensitive decisions for service providers to make. In many cases we’re talking about women – trans or not – who’ve been the victims of sexual assault or domestic abuse at the hands of men. It is right that each organisation needs to look at their own specific case and decide what’s best for the people who use their services.

With regards to sports, all sports should have a level playing field, but that is not for politicians or the Government to decide. Sporting bodies should assess these issues themselves in relation to their own individual sports, balancing safety, fairness and inclusion.

Regarding your concerns over the piece published on Lib Dem Voice, this is an independent website run by a group of volunteers who are Liberal Democrat members and activists. The content published there is not always indicative of national party policy, nor does it explicitly express the views of any Liberal Democrat member or MP aside from the author of the piece that you read.

You also mention Ed Davey saying that ’transwomen are women’. In basic biological terms, the vast majority of people are either born male or female, with men having penises and women having vaginas. In the eyes of the law (Gender Recognition Act 2004), however, it is possible for someone to be recognised as a woman if she was born a male and has since transitioned to identify as a woman. This was the wider context of the quote you mention. I would like to add that this is not a party policy or personal stance, but a matter of legal definition.

On the shocking events you witnessed in Manchester last year, and the comments of a trans activist you reference, there is absolutely no excuse for threatening or violent language or behaviour, regardless of passionately held views. Unfortunately, this is part of a wider debate that has become far too toxic and hostile. The Liberal Democrats have therefore consistently called for misogyny to be classified as a hate crime, as incidents and crimes motivated by hatred of a particular gender are arbitrarily not included within the current definition.

As we as a society grapple with the difficult questions, challenges and choices thrown up by ensuring we are inclusive and tolerant, whilst also protecting and promoting all women’s safety, I entirely agree with you that we need to have good-faith conversations about ensuring everyone’s safety and dignity. Many people, myself included, are on a journey with understanding these issues and we owe it to each other to allow ourselves the time and space to explore valid questions and challenge each other without fear and with an open mind. As your Member of Parliament, I will continue to use my platform to fight for women’s rights and protect women and girls.

There is no evidence that predatory men have abused the Equality Act to gain access to women’s spaces.

Is your MP claiming to have never heard of sexual predators such as Katie Dolatowski, Karen White or Isla Bryson? Bryson was very prominently in the news earlier this year, so a claim not to have heard of this case indicates that your MP is claiming not to pay any attention to the news at all. A strange thing for an MP to claim.

Disregarding the part about the Equality Act, there is, of course, plenty more evidence that males who identify as trans have sexually assaulted women and girls, and there is also plenty of evidence that men, whether pretending to be trans or not, have entered women's spaces to attack women and girls. Examples of both here:

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/womens_rights/3348290-It-will-never-happen-resource-thread

And here:

https://grahamlinehan.substack.com/p/this-never-happens

Your MP seems very naive and sheltered if they think sexual predators would never make false claims in order to obtain an opportunity to gain access to women and girls.

It’s worrying that your LD MP is unaware of the actual wording of the EA.

So nine elegantly phrased paragraphs to say ODFOD.

And to think I spent hours canvassing for them in the last election. They have truly lost my vote and women power.

As a woman and the mother of a young daughter, I am very clear that single-sex safe spaces for women are essential and must be protected. I also recognise that trans women have the right to dignity and safety too and will need to be able to access toilets, changing rooms and other single-sex facilities when going about their daily lives.

So just immediately contradict yourself?

They don't know the meaning of single sex?

So Ed Davey was actually saying TWs with a GRC are legally women but not biologically. Great. I'll await his clarification imminently.

Also

The Liberal Democrats have therefore consistently called for misogyny to be classified as a hate crime, as incidents and crimes motivated by hatred of a particular gender are arbitrarily not included within the current definition.

A particular gender. Not either/a sex. So not protecting women/girls actually.

OP until the Manchester bit you could have been me.

That reply is infuriating and contradictory. As she is a ‘mother of a young daughter’ I expect she will become very much more aware of these issues. I expect she will start to realise as her daughter gets older that she think more about safeguarding.

I would reply to each sentence with facts and figures.

On a personal point - my teenage daughter was bedridden in hospital. She was in pain terrified. The young nurses were incredible in respecting and acknowledging her personal care. Your mp may like to be reminded by the age of 16 her daughter may be left on an adult ward and she would not be with her. Your mp needs to think through her ideology given the recent expose of sexual assaults in hospitals.

And changing rooms? Ask Primark how that’s going.

There are so many examples. Don’t even get me started on toilets! Nice she recognises single sex spaces. For instance how could it possibly be that ‘gender neutral’ toilets have stopped having door gaps and go right to the floor? Privacy? Safety? How contradictory. But this has the knock on affect that girls don’t want to change their sanitary products in earshot of boys, deal with wee all over the seats. And there is an increase in sexual assaults (more in mixed sex toilets) and more privacy for risky behaviours (drug taking, self-harm). And the big one for me - my daughter having a seizure (without warning) with no one to see her collapsed behind a full height closed door. Where does anyone go when they are feeling ill in public? Diabetics/having a miscarriage/feeling funny before a heart attack or stroke?

Maybe you could signpost her to this thread? And we could all give her some examples of what her young daughter will be up against (hopefully her daughter will never be in vulnerable situations as mine). Compelled speech? Correct-think? Fear to say humans can’t change sex? Not allowed to question a man in the women’s toilets/changing rooms? The police knocking at her door and ‘logging’ her if she is seen taking a photo of a women’s rights sticker?

At the route of all this is women trying to safeguard. Particularly their children which is why mumsnet is relevant. The best safeguarding means horrible incidents don’t happen in the first place.

Key word for her: Prevention.

Well that makes it easy for you not to vote LD then.