Male asked if I am pregnant when donating blood

[slipperypenguin]

I am a GC male. I am a regular blood donor, but today for the first time I was specifically asked by the nurse to confirm if I am / could possibly be pregnant.

I laughed as I thought she was joking as I felt it was obvious I am a biological male and therefore could not possibly be pregnant, but she told me they were "inclusive" and had to confirm.

This was in Scotland at a regular blood donor clinic.

Am I just out of touch with the times or is the world gone man? I can confirmed that I am a male yet am forced to answer this question in order to donate.

@NecessaryScene when dealing with an unwell patient needing emergency care in a busy environment where I need to develop a relationship and gain their trust so they comply with what needs to be done yes I won’t use terminology that I know might upset them and make them not feel accepted because that’s my job.

@NecessaryScene please let me know how you would support a young trans person who had been sexually assaulted or taken an overdose or was going through mental health distress feel safe and comfortable in your care.

also you missed an important part of my sentence in your quote which changes the meaning. You need the teen to comply with what is going on (ie their treatment) and getting their backs up is not helpful.

Could you refuse to answe, just keep on stating that you're biologically male. You're the one doing them a favour, so they would then be forced to decide whether "being inclusive" is more important than receiving blood donations

I don’t think anybody is blaming you for trying to help your patients, Wishiwasatailor but this is about larger, societal forces. I understand why you might use ‘inclusive’ language in an A&E setting but overall and in non-emergency situations, no, I don’t believe that affirming young people that they ‘pass’ for the opposite sex when they don’t, or telling them there are no risks to transition, is doing them any favours.

Btw, would you make a patient who is using racist language or behaving in a sexually inappropriate manner in A&E ‘feel accepted’? There are boundaries to what health care practitioners tolerate, no? Where exactly are these boundaries?

@TheirEminence it was in response to @NecessaryScene comment of how it’s fine to get peoples backs up when I had said that I use language that makes them feel accepted.

I would tell them that their language or behaviour is unacceptable and that if they wanted to continue receiving treatment they would need to stop if they did I would then continue to give patient care. the problem is our personal boundaries are often overridden by senior staff and management.

@HollyDollyChristmas Ive already responded a few times to the notion that I was "offended" answering the question. Suggest you RTFT.

I won’t use terminology that I know might upset them and make them not feel accepted because that’s my job.

My point is that you seem to be justifying using terminology that upsets people here. The whole point of this thread is a non-genderologist being upset by their carer using obviously genderological terminology, and insisting on them complying.

Maybe you're not in favour of that, but if so it's not clear.

@NecessaryScene I used “assigned” once then I explained why and said I would use birth sex going forward as personally I find 2 different phrases for the same thing depending on the audience tricky as I’m likely to slip up.
i agree biological sex is the most accurate but that won’t fly at work and I agree that assigned denotes choice so birth sex is my neutral phrase.

Thanks for clarifying, Wishiwasatailor. I could get into serious difficulties if I did not use ‘preferred’ pronouns at work, so I am forced to do it. However, for my own sanity, I use sex-based pronouns about whoever I wish to talk about in my private life. That’s my boundary.

How did it happen that the term 'biological sex' cannot be used in a medical setting?

What kind of surreal nonsense is this and why why why are so many of those in authority complicit?

It's utter madness.

@everlastingpanini ive found it’s not particularly conducive to building relationships with gender questioning patients when you have a limited time to gain their trust and compliance.

A few people gave asked if it's true that trans men won't be called for smears - yes. My friend has a trans man as a sibling (ASD, needs a little help with things but can live semi independently). I was once saying to her how I heard nhs changes records so trans men don't get the automated call for smears (she knows my stance), she looked into it for her 'brother' and found he hadn't been called for one and contacted GP and got it sorted. I don't know if now (s)he will be called for repeat smears in years to come.

This is really worrying. Due to the deleterious effects that supraphysiological doses of testosterone are known to have on all aspects of the female reproductive system, women who are taking exogenous testosterone should be PRIORITISED for smear tests, not overlooked.

In fact I think that women who are taking exogenous testosterone should be invited for a twice yearly MRI to check for uterine atrophy, which can be fatal - as it nearly was for Buck Angel.

Speaking of Buck Angel, and returning to the OP, I think it's probably a wise questions to ask, even for a blood donor who appears male. Some women who've been taking testosterone for a very long time do appear very masculine - like Buck - and although it's hugely unlikely that they would be able to get pregnant due to the terrible damage that testosterone does to women, it's not worth risking it. There are always outliers, so yes the question should be asked.

From the official NHS screening information posted by Wishy:

3.2 Trans men and non-binary people assigned female at birth

This use of assigned by our official national medical organisation is so wrong.
What other meanings are they fudging and eliding?

Couldn't this be considered 'Mis-sexing'?

I would personally refuse to answer anything relating to what was 'assigned' to me at birth, I don't remember anything about my birth, how the hell am I supposed to know if something was 'assigned' to me when I was born if I can't even remember it?

OP in your shoes I would have said yes.

Because if they ask a stupid question expect a stupid answer.

If I recall it is outlawed in the UK, but in overseas fertility clinics they will weigh sperm to separate out the sperm with X and Y chromosomes for couple who want a specific sexed baby, boy or girl, then only use the sperm for assisted conception that will give the right outcome. Sex is decided at conception and observed at birth.

I had not realised that sex could be changed on medical records as I had not realised that the legal lie (I think it is called) of a GRC would be extended to this.

It is important to realise that a Gender Recognition Certificate is not needed to change the sex marker on your NHS records. It is not needed either for changes to a passport or a driving licence.

It is only needed to change the sex recorded on the birth certificate and to change the details of your marriage after the event.

Melroses · Today 14:29
It is important to realise that a Gender Recognition Certificate is not needed to change the sex marker on your NHS records. It is not needed either for changes to a passport or a driving licence.

It is only needed to change the sex recorded on the birth certificate and to change the details of your marriage after the event.

Thank you for making that clear. What a mess. You cannot take a fundamental fact of life, and start pretending it doesn’t exist.

Yes it is a huge mess.

That is why I say it is abusive. It forces the people around them to lie, and for those people to lie to the people around them and to force others into compliance.

It happens in organisations but also at a personal level in families.

It also messes up the NHS data they are so keen on - they even have stats incl the number of men who have hysterectomies🤷‍♀️

They ask everyone. There are a lot of gender non-conforming people in the world. If someone refuses to answer, they can't acccept the donation.

Well refusing the donation would be a bit shortsighted

www.nhsbt.nhs.uk/news/national-blood-week-one-million-new-blood-donors-needed-over-next-5-years/

Well done, Banana. I can’t believe the way children’s perception of reality is being relentlessly undermined.