Why the pride in poor male behaviour?

[CarolineHelston]

I was talking to a younger female relative about her young son and whether he'd reached a particular developmental milestone. She said beaming, 'Well he could do it but he's lazy and stubborn like his Dad. He'd rather other people did it for him.' And I thought why do some of us regard this as clever and endearing?

Is this a normal thing though? Normally you'll find the opposite. If she wasn't joking that sounds like a really unhealthy dynamic anyway (or if she was doing that half-joking but its really what I think kind of way). My ex would sometimes do a Joking-but-not-really-joking thing where he'd point to my flaws/claim any bad (developmentally normal) behaviour of our child was inherited from me. To be fair he did stop completely when I pointed out it could be really damaging to our son and that's someone who I'm already separated from who dislikes me.

So it could be more of a dig at his dad than actual pride in poor behaviour...

I saw it as indulgent maternal thing - as if it was a way she/other women might feel good about themselves. (I/we aren't like these lazy men/boys.)

Yeah, I think this is normal and it's not something people just say about males.

Mothers, and dads too I imagine, can be indulgent in some ways when they see their kids have similar foibles to their parents, or sometimes other close relatives. It's kind of recognizing yourself in the next generation. That doesn't make them "proud" of these failings but generally most of us don't expect our kids will be perfect.