TRAs Promoting Mastectomy

[TayJay94]

My sister thinks she's FTM and has been transitioning for a while and follows a lot of TRAs on social media. I follow her account so i see a lot of them. I've seen a lot of posts recently from women who've transitioned supporting things like mastectomy, and she's thinking about getting one herself.

She interacts with this account and has mentioned it to me, i've posted something from he blog here before trying to understand and had sympathy

twitter.com/MxJackParker/status/1581228471686418432

but this post is just teaching confused young women how to get surgery??? This really seems like promoting it to me. I've seen a lot of that recently.

That is horrifying. How can this be promoted as a positive outcome? The pain, time to heal, scarring and loss of sensation. Being able to actually feel some of their own chest was a “bonus” ?!!

This is happening a lot of social media along with encourage lesbians to "microdose with T"

Testosterone and Mastectomies are a lifestyle choice it seems that are being encouraged.

This is happening a lot of social media along with encourage lesbians to "microdose with T"

What is the point of that?

And the mathematical pedant in me assumes that we're not actually talking a one-millionth dose here, right?

The only thing about 'promoting' it is... it looks awful.

I see though that like pro-anorexia material, stuff that looks horrific if you're in a mentally stable place and not suffering from a disorder might seem attractive to people in a dysphoric state. There's almost a sacrificial element about it... they were hunched over and barely healed but then went to a protest. I'm reminded of the phase a lot of girls used to go through about wanting to be a nun.

I note that they report not taking painkillers. Maybe they genuinely didn't need to but maybe that was part of the sacrificial element. Or the rite of passage to 'become a man'.

I felt sympathetic at first reading about their journey. Poor kid.

Then I read their tweet informing other kids how it is still possible to get testosterone! Sympathy gone!

I actually don't think anything is wrong with someone telling their story truthfully. This doesn't read to me like glamourising the procedure or encouraging young people to have it on a whim. It looks like an honest account of their experience.

If you are OK with detransioners who regret this procudure speaking up then surely you have to be ok with others who don't doing the same.

Yes exactly. It seems like an honest account that isn't pretending that it's all sunshine and rainbows.

jacksurviveswhoring.wordpress.com/2022/09/18/the-shame-of-discussing-childhood-abuse-for-queer-people-and-sex-workers/

jacksurviveswhoring.wordpress.com/2021/12/31/transmascs-rentboys-and-why-we-hate-ourselves/

www.gofundme.com/f/kbnnx-help-jack-get-top-surgery

This person seems to be in a terrible place, emotionally, financially & physically.

I remember your previous post and your worries re: your sister having experienced some sort of trauma.

Perhaps you could use this as in-road into asking her why she chose this person as an example to send you, and if there is something in their stories in common beyond both having a cross sex identity?

Oh crap, I accidentally posted a go fund me, but for the story on it, rather than to actually raise funds! Hopefully MN will let it through.

I think that might be a good idea, but i'm sort of terrified about what sort of answer i'd get. I've wondered for a while if she might have experienced some sort of abuse when she was young because there were some sketchy people around us when we were kids. With this, i think it might be time for that conversation. Wish our parents were willing to have that talk with her instead, but if they won't then i will. :/

I really want to get through to her before she does things more permanent than what she already has.

Maybe collect up some resources for abuse survivors before you start?

That way if you find out the worse case scenario is true, you’ll at least be somewhat prepared as to what to do next?

Your sister is lucky to have you looking out for her

That sounds like a good idea, i'll try that.

It feels like such an uphill battle a lot of the time, trying to talk her down from ideas about mastectomy and she's been on hormones for a while now. I wonder how much of that is because of social media stuff that i had no idea she was looking it. It seems like a lot of these trans-identifying girls look up to other ones and get information from there, but theres no way for me to get her away from it.

it must be very compelling, thinking you’ve finally found your tribe, especially if you’ve been isolated via a traumatic past or ASD or internalised homophobia etc.

All you can really do is keep asking gentle questions and reassuring her that she is lovable as she is.

one of the things that I’ve found quite revealing is how many of these young women and adolescent say they are male but they aren’t really interested in actual male-ness, only transman-maleness.
They don’t really want to be men, they want to be not-women.

They display their mastectomy scars (or pose in binders) as a symbol of being in the transmanclub.

Be prepared for pushback and denial the first time you ask about CSA - just push the door open a crack and let your sister know that when she’s ready to push the door all the way open herself, you’ll stand beside her while she does it.

There were some good posts re: the psychological experience of realising you were groomed many years later on the tail end of the second Mermaids thread, IIRC.