What practical steps?

[PinotPony]

Ok so I'm slightly nervous about posting as it seems lots of new posters are thought to be trolls or journalists but I'll take that risk. I've been on MN for decades but only recently strayed into the Feminist discussions.

I've only recently woken up to the extent to which gender ideology undermines women's rights. I'm slowly climbing the hill referred to on here. I've done much reading of the threads on here and discussed the issues with trusted friends including some trans friends. Fundamentally I don't agree with gender ideology, which reinforces stereotypes and seems to wish to erase the very existence of women.

I've always considered myself to be pretty liberal and left wing. I struggled with the idea that I might be perceived as transphobic or a TERF. I'm now very cautious about speaking out on social media or at work for fear of repercussions.

I am well aware that I have a lot more education and understanding to acquire and I know I don't fully understand all the issues.

My question is... what can I practically do to help balance women's rights with trans rights? I feel I should be doing more than just reading up and talking about it!

Welcome OP good to have you on board . Just thinking about other protected characteristics (because a clash of rights isn't novel), I would want to distinguish between (I) having rights as opposed to taking them from others and (II) freedom of belief as opposed to insisting that others also subscribe to your beliefs.

So, for example, trans people should not be discriminated against at work simply because they are trans, because that would be unfair but this does not mean they get to remove women's rights to single sex spaces. Similarly, trans people can believe what they wish (as can Christians, Muslims, Jedi Knights etc) but cannot and should not insist that everyone else must believe the same.

Hi OP. I don't think you are alone - there are a lot of people who didn't want to be known as a transphobe or a TERF but are now looking into the issues more and more. People who are concerned about child protection, the rights of people who are observed as female at birth, female sport etc.

Practically, I think the best thing you can do is talk about it. Not at work, but with trusted friends and relatives. So many people have been frightened to speak after the way that people like JKR have been treated. Fear and the silence that flows from it have prevented people from speaking out.

What a great question @PinotPony Things you can do

• gently ask questions when people spout "Transwomen are women"


• give money to organisations (eg Sex Matters, FiLIA, Women's Place UK and so on)


• There are some really good Zoom meetings (generally Saturday afternoon & Sunday morning) run by the Women's Declaration International (WDI)


• subscribe to various Substacks: Julie Bindel; Helen Joyce; Graham Linehan - help people who've lost work & income if you can

Write to your MP. Keep an eye on current events and pitch in with a gc viewpoint to counteract the tras who will try to dominate narratives. Remember it's not anti-trans, no matter how often you're told that, it's pro-women's rights and safeguarding.

@GoodThinkingMax "gently ask questions" - I totally agree. I think almost everyone who isn't 100% GC has a degree of cognitive dissonance where they believe mutually exclusive things.

Hi, I too consider myself to be liberal left leaning person. I was very much live and let live. My friend just kept talking to me about stuff in a non pushy way until eventually I arrived here and have never looked back. There are lots of things you can do but email. To me one of the most important things is language and the right to have my own beliefs. To me I have a duty to help protect those women who don't have a voice, non verbal disabled girls and women, elderly women needing intimate care, women in prison, women needing single sex group counselling in rape centres. There are so many strands, Nordic Model Now, Stop Surrogacy, Object. The best thing is to take up the cause with one of these strands that is important to you.

For me it was what is being taught in schools, ensuring toilets and changing rooms remain single sex, encouraging my school to have a separate sexual harrasment policy. Safe Schools Alliance and Everyone is Invited.

I've moved on to my council now to check whether they are signed up to Stonewall and chd king their language in their equality policies to check they use sex not gender.

What do they know, is a good website that helps you write freedom of information requests.this is also good for browsing if anything has been done in your area.

Meeting other like minded women is good for your sanity. In my area I am up to about 15 connections. We are careful about only meeting in person and vetting each other. Let Women Speak is a good place to meet people as is but the Women's Rights Network.

Honestly it can be so overwhelming and frustrating and you feel quite helpless at times but I find coming on here always lifts my spirits. Stick to something small and one area for starters and you will soon get into the swing of it!

yes write to your MP, For Women Scotland, Transgender Trend, Sex Matters and Women's Rights Network all have various letter writing campaigns to MPs or MSPs. They've taken the hard work out so make use of them! Also if you have the financial wherewithall to donate to crowdfunders that would be great.

Thank you for all the useful advice. I'll definitely write to my MP and will give some thought to which specific issues are most important to me.

I really want to be able to articulate my thoughts when discussing trans rights but it's so very difficult when people shut you down. "Gentle questions" is a good approach...

"Gentle questions" is a good approach...

"Help me understand your perspective on why [X]" may also be helpful.

X = single sex spaces, prisons, hospital wards, sports etc

OP, I suspect the majority of us here are are lefties desperately hoping for our party to stand up and admit transwomen aren't women and to propose significant changes that would protect our rights and single-sex spaces.

In all honesty, talk to people about it. This is what makes the difference. Question the narratives. Remain rational and open minded, ask questions, write to your MP, councillors, support those who talk about it on social media, stick up for the women who've put their careers on the line.

There's a tonne of information, many overlapping issues - you don't need to know all of it, you just need to keep asking questions to challenge the assertion that gender matters more than sex. At base, it's fairly simple. We are asking for single sex rights to be protected, that's all.

Welcome.

And read Helen Joyce's book Trans (sometimes available on Kindle for a mere 99p) which will give you a rational gallop through how we got to where we are today.

A point I find useful is about self-ID, the (proposed) right for anyone to be accepted as the opposite sex if they say they are.

I’d say, never mind the small number of genuine transwomen who would gain access to women’s facilities that way.

My concern is the massive number of ordinary male sex predators who would have exactly the same right, to follow girls into women’s toilets, to expose themselves in women’s changing rooms, to harass female patients in women’s wards etc etc. How would you keep them out?

This is already happening to some extent, as so many organisations, from retail chains to the NHS, allow men to self-ID into women’s spaces. That’s largely because organisations are frightened of attacks by trans Twitter mobs. But it would happen a lot more if gender self-ID became the law.

I like the phrasing of "Help me understand your perspective on"...@EmbarrassingHadrosaurus I can see it combining well with the asking gentle questions technique.

As there are such big differences in how words are used misunderstanding in conversations between 'factions' feels almost inevitable so I'd suggest a very gentle "and how are you defining that?"
Accept using the word with that meaning but you can add in qualifiers so e.g. "For the purposes of this conversation what word or words would you like me use to describe adult human females?"