Non-Binary is the new "not like other girls"

[MrsRCBlack]

4w.pub/non-binary-is-the-new-not-like-other-girls-and-its-deeply-rooted-in-misogyny/

Very interesting article from 2019. The author was actually fired from her unrelated job for writing it.

These kids are basically the goths of the 90s. I have hopes they'll hit 26 and think 'jesus, I've been such a prick' and get over themselves.

Not high hopes, mind you.

Lots of the older - by which I mean [late]20s-40s, I’ve not (yet) encountered any in the 50+ bracket - female non-binary people explicitly add the “femme” modifier when telling you they’re non-binary. As well as stressing that gender identity & gender expression should not be conflated &/or confused. They claim every right to be wounded &/or outraged every time they are “misgendered” because they say their long hair; elaborate make-up; & outfits like a crop top, mini skirt & high heels don’t mean they’re at all even slightly a user of female pronouns & how could anyone think that?!

They’re the same demographic who pronounce themselves queer because in Lower V (& it often is Lower V not Y10) they fancied the Head Girl &/or they drunkenly kissed a girl That One Time. It’s all about the Oppression Points & being Special & Interesting.

There's a good C4 documentary called 'where have all the lesbians gone'. I found it enlightening as it you could see the younger women, in their twenties, clearly having identity crisis. So whilst I disagreed with them it did make me have some sympathy for the things they were struggling with. It's tough being a young person. Male or female.

If I were 25 years younger, I’d probably consider myself non-binary. What I can’t imagine myself ever doing is correcting people’s way of talking about me: I find it incredibly arrogant to think that other people should make special exceptions for me linguistically. I was once asked, walking home from school, by someone I didn’t know, whether I was a boy or a girl? So I obviously was hitting the non-binary mark, long before it ever became popular 😂For me it was about rejecting traditional femininity, I wasn’t going to wear dresses, heels, make up etc, and do ‘girly’ things. I practiced martial arts and played football with the lads. And little to anyone surprise, I grew up to mostly lesbian 😉

Very true, this message could well be coming from outside of them.

There's a lot of pressure for girls to conform so I guess they are looking for where they fit in and also to make sense of themselves.

But it's a fix that I believe doesn't help them, or women in the long run, much like the author writes.

There is also a huge amount of pressure on girls to be NB. It is very much the way of expressing teenage angst which seems to be sweeping schools like wildfire at the moment. 2/3 of the girls in DD's year (10) are either trans masc boys or femme non binary.

DD is non binary but doesn't want any changes to her body (other than puberty not to be happening) and doesn't comment on pronouns. Thank heavens. She also agrees that cat gender, fairy gender etc are utter bobbins.

I just try to tell myself it will probably have less serious long term impacts than the people in my school year with severe anorexia my sister's friends who all cut themselves or the friends of my best friend who were pregnant at 15....

But it is obviously and definitely not a phase. DD has been very clear on that point.

I really don't understand the non-binary thing. I'm not stereotypically girly but I still consider myself a woman. I find it insulting that people treat it like something to be ashamed of or something you can't be unless you fit a stereotype. I hate that those same people try to opt out of being a woman and don't care about women's rights.
I really worry that as a childless person in my early 30s potential employers will quietly assume I'll leave to have a baby and will continue to worry until I'm well into my 40s. I think every woman should be concerned about it and speak up when it happens but fewer will because they think it doesn't wont to them.

• won't apply to them

I probably could identify as a nonbinary, too, given that I seem to have no particular gender identity and my hobbies and work etc. are all over the gender spectrum (heh). The gender identity system doesn't allow one to opt out of it, so I would be classed as nonbinary, specifically agender! I could demand new pronouns and everything, to control how people talk about me when I am not in the room.

It's fascinating as a social phenomenon. Wonder what percentage in the enbie group is male? Less than half I am willing to bet, but how much less?