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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

If you use the term "genital preference", I have questions for you

20 replies

PurgatoryOfPotholes · 23/10/2021 14:15

Some questions I found on a blog. I would like activists who do not believe in the immutability of homosexuality, and think that lesbians should include transwomen in their dating pool, to answer these for me.

extract

10a) if the only way to eradicate genital preference in a woman was through exploration of gender theory and re-framing of her perceptions of what it means to be a man or woman, would this be an appropriate response?

10b) if the only way to eradicate genital preference in a woman was through damaging her opportunities to access employment, housing, and social support networks as a response to non-compliance, would this be an appropriate response?

10c) if the only way to eradicate genital preference in a woman was through re-education at a dedicated facility, would this be an appropriate response?

10d) if the only way to eradicate genital preference in a woman was through aversion therapy — inducing, for example, intense self-loathing and worthlessness in response to undesirable feelings– would this be an appropriate response?

10e) if the only way to eradicate genital preference in a woman was through electroshock therapy, would this be an appropriate response?

10f) if the only way to eradicate genital preference in a woman was through internment followed by six months of brothel work followed by murder, would this be an appropriate response?

10g) if not, why not?

apacificisland.wordpress.com/2017/02/14/unanswered-unanswerable-alt-title-agenda/

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EmbarrassingHadrosaurus · 23/10/2021 14:25

Those are interesting questions. I'll be checking in to see if there are any responses from the posters who perceive it as a sacred community service to pop in to scold us on a regular basis for their perception that we espouse wrongthink and spend our money on crowdfunding legal actions of which they disapprove .

BernardBlackMissesLangCleg · 23/10/2021 14:48

the term 'genital preference' is out and out homophobia

eagerly awaiting one of the monitors coming along to explain why it isn't homophobic at all

come on guys! we can tell you're there from the drive by woke scoldings you so regularly extrude

JellySaurus · 23/10/2021 14:53

What's wrong with genital preference? How is it any difference to having a preference for a hairy chest or small breasts?

Lovelyricepudding · 23/10/2021 14:55

What type of conversion therapy is acceptable?

PurgatoryOfPotholes · 23/10/2021 15:28

@JellySaurus

What's wrong with genital preference? How is it any difference to having a preference for a hairy chest or small breasts?
Not sure whether you're asking about the term itself, or the wider issue. I dislike the term because it diminishes non-negotiable sexual orientation.

I might prefer a certain level of hair (none!) on someone's chest, but I could still feel attracted to someone hairier than I prefer.
Bit like ice-cream. I prefer chocolate, but can enjoy vanilla if available.

On the other hand, my gay brother is just never ever going to be able to ignore a prospective sexual partner being female. And neither of us will ever be able to eat liver without feeling sick.

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BitterAndOnlySlightlyTwisted · 23/10/2021 15:29

There’s no such thing as a “genital preference”. Sexual orientation is not the same as deciding which wine to have with dinner.

All this talk of genital preferences and how to over-ride women’s sexual orientation is blatantly and disgustingly rapey. .

BatmansBat · 23/10/2021 17:11

@JellySaurus

I am trying to understand your view better.

Do you think it is ok to tell a gay man that his orientation towards penises is a preference only ? And that he needs to also consider masculine women as maybe he hasn’t come across the right vagina yet?

randomthings · 23/10/2021 17:28

the term 'genital preference' is out and out homophobia

Yes it is. And context is everything and the context is shaming. Its used as an insult, to shame people into thinking there is something wrong with them for being same sex attracted. Its actively seeking to make same sex attracted people go back in the closet.

God, this movement gender ideology movement is so perniciously regressive!

JellySaurus · 23/10/2021 17:39

What business is it of anybody's? If someone doesn't want to have sex with you that's all there is to it. You have no right to an explanation. Nobody has the right to have sex with a specific person, only with a person that wants to have sex with them.

Equating sexual orientation with genital preference is offensive, of the same class as calling women 'cervix havers'.

Soontobe60 · 23/10/2021 17:39

@JellySaurus

What's wrong with genital preference? How is it any difference to having a preference for a hairy chest or small breasts?
Your sexuality isn’t a preference. That implies one can just choose who one is attracted to. I am straight. I would only have sex with men. That doesn’t mean I’d have sex with any man. I can look at women and find some of them ‘attractive’ in a way because of their presentation, but I would never want to have sex with them.
Artichokeleaves · 23/10/2021 18:22

If you would be willing to offer a relationship or sexual access to your body to someone who fundamentally denies you your right to state your sexual orientation, to be homosexual, and believes that your primary requirement as a female is to be inclusive with your body and 'learn to cope' with unwanted, unenjoyable sex for the sake of a male born partner? Who believes that if you're not enjoying the sex you didn't want you must try harder to condition yourself to their way of thinking?

Fgs read around the relationships board and consider the Freedom Programme, you have a major problem. No one with these beliefs is ever someone to get into bed with absolutely regardless of their sex or identity.

BatmansBat · 23/10/2021 20:18

Wow, so saying that being a homesexual man means penis only is offensive according to some? And needs to be kept quiet? I find that extremely homophobic actually.

SusannaRowan · 23/10/2021 20:34

Your sexuality isn’t a preference.

Thank you, I didn't understand the ire over the term "genital preference". But it's the word preference that is obviously an issue.

BatmansBat · 23/10/2021 20:46

To me, preference means that I could do both, but that I have a preference for one over the other. That is why I wanted to clarify what Jelly meant.

Sexuality is not a “preference”, it is innate. If you are homosexual, you don’t have “a preference” for one sex, you are exclusively attractive to that sex.

To say that you cannot state that exclusive attraction, to say that you need to hide it in order to placate people who conflates gender with sex is offensive.

MrGHardy · 23/10/2021 23:10

Sorry but anyone using that term is either homophobic or a sheep indoctrinated by the gender ideologues.

Igmum · 24/10/2021 13:11

Interesting that none of the usual trolls who disrupt threads on here have tried to answer these questions. Perhaps they are away for the weekend? I'm sure there will be some nuanced, intelligently argued and well-evidenced answers along any second now...

PurgatoryOfPotholes · 24/10/2021 13:30

The silence has been very disappointing!

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Igmum · 24/10/2021 13:56
trancepants · 24/10/2021 14:11

The only way the phrase is ok, is if it is to indicate a preference about the characteristics of a partner's genitals. When it comes to a penis, for example, I have a bit of a soft spot for ones that bend in unusual ways.

Deliriumoftheendless · 24/10/2021 18:42

Have any of the regulars shown up yet?

I have seen this (notionally) addressed here before. (I’m fact I think it’s occurring on another thread right now.)

The answer is usually “no one has to have sex with anyone, you weirdos!” Which is true but ignores some power structures and the hold social circles have on us.

So no, of course a lesbian doesn’t have to sleep with a transwoman. But there is often an unspoken suggestion that to not to will be branded “the transphobic terf” of the group.

There are often threads here about how upset women are to be unfriended on social media by long standing friends over sharing articles by JK Rowling etc. It’s a genuine source of sadness for these women. But they have other friends, spouses/partners, work colleagues with varied views. They are not college students who go to class, socialise and hang out online with people who will often be asked to choose between the “transphobe” and the “victim”.

(It goes without saying that NATWALT but for the posters who need it pointing out because they are deliberately hard of reading- it only takes the actions of a few to create an environment of caution.)

But for those young lesbians who could lose friends and social standing it is a choice that is not made freely.

In the same vein-
Why do people think abusers like Weinstein got away with appalling behaviour? Because if your career and social circle can be destroyed on the say so of one man many women will feel they have no option but to keep quiet. Be nice.

It’s nothing new. It’s still coercion.

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