Sex Education on Netflix addresses LGBTQA+ (spoilers)

[CervixSampler]

I'm still trying to make my mind up about how the issues are portrayed. I don't want to give any spoilers either if people didn't binge watch it like me.

There a two NB characters and queer relationships, changing facilities, sex education itself and binding are included. Some things are done well but I can't decide if the writers are on the fence in someways but totally on board with things like binding.

Cal is non-binary and has issues with the dress code the new draconian head introduces. Sex Ed is split into girls and boys and Cal asks which they should go into. HT replies that there's a session on female anatomy that might prove useful in helping Cal decide if they are a boy or girl even though they are neither (in their opinion). The portrayal of relationship issues was interesting and the head boy decided he wasn't queer so couldn't be in a relationship with an NB. He is clearly heterosexual and referred to as cishet by Cal.

Lots of nuance I think and I like the way issues of teenage life are explored. Maybe the writers have kept things on the fence so as not to be accused of anything although I thought the deciding he couldn't date an NB person was risky in terms of potential backlash. Is enbyphobic a thing?

Having seen it I've no issue with it.

I felt very frustrated watching it.

Binding was promoted as safe and romanticised.

The HT clearly had some outrageous approaches, so throwing in her GC position lumped it in with her other views to make her look like a bad person.

The head boy struggling with whether he was queer or not because he fancied Cal was difficult to watch. He was interested in Cal because of underlying biology. It was a relief to see his decision that he would not categorise himself as queer, whilst being in a heterosexual relationship.

I thought it was done fairly well tbh.

Granted there was an attempt to make the head look mean/cruel but also they made her human. U did empathise and agree with her at the same time. And I think it honestly addressed the boy/girl issue witg regards to the sex Ed class. And actually she had some good points about not being so self absorbed and issues needing proper support not just a badge and behaviour not being irrelevant or overlooked just because of being lgbt.

I also think it would have made the audience think that no matter what the identity relationships are still hetero/homo/bi sexual.

I agree that the head teachers sensible comments implying it was obvious which session Cal should go to because it’s about anatomy was completely clouded by the head being a farcically awful person.

I thought it was interesting that Cal and the head boy didn’t get together. I don’t think it was him refusing to date an NB person, it was Cal saying he couldn’t date them unless he identified as queer. To me this came across as ridiculously self-obsessed - that Cal wouldn’t date him unless he gave himself a particular label, which says nothing about the relationship between them. So a bit GC. But I’ve no idea if this is how it was supposed to come across. Maybe to young people this is an entirely reasonable position.

I agree that the chest binding was a bit crap - chest binding with bandages - bad; chest binding with a binder - no problem.

Btw, on a tangent, I recently read a book where a character was introduced, and then his sibling and their child. It was not explained that this sibling was non-binary and used ‘they’ pronouns and I spent quite a while thinking this character had a child with his own sister.

I agree that the head teachers sensible comments implying it was obvious which session Cal should go to because it’s about anatomy was completely clouded by the head being a farcically awful person

Maybe I wasn't paying enough attention but I don't actually think the head cane across as that bad really.

Shed been handed a school where pupils and teachers alike seemed determined to shit all over themselves. Some of the rules she introduced were misguided but they were to overall try and benefit the children.

I think she managed to expose just how irresponsible and immature and selfish the kids were actually being and that ultimately they had too much freedom as the adults were more concerned with being liked than being responsible adults.

The sex Ed videos were a joke though. But then it did give the kids a chance to show the kind of maturity they needed to show around sex and take the personal responsibility. In a backwards way it worked if that makes sense

@MintTeaLady

I felt very frustrated watching it.

Binding was promoted as safe and romanticised.

The HT clearly had some outrageous approaches, so throwing in her GC position lumped it in with her other views to make her look like a bad person.

The head boy struggling with whether he was queer or not because he fancied Cal was difficult to watch. He was interested in Cal because of underlying biology. It was a relief to see his decision that he would not categorise himself as queer, whilst being in a heterosexual relationship.

I agree with all of that. The binding scenes made me both cry and feel insulted at the same time. That someone could hate their own sex so much that they would intentionally hurt themselves and it being presented as reasonable made me feel quite uncomfortable.

I loved Amy's vulva cupcakes though 😂

I agree with all of that. The binding scenes made me both cry and feel insulted at the same time. That someone could hate their own sex so much that they would intentionally hurt themselves and it being presented as reasonable made me feel quite uncomfortable

I dont think it presented it as being reasonable at all tbh. I think it did alot to show that actually its not the harmless affirming " treatment " it's made out to be and just how out the loop parents are on all this and that the kids are all just seeking advice from eachother but " eachother " is equally all as messed up as they are.

Big fans of this show in our house and I thought in the main they trod a very tactful line on these issues.
Was it definitely a binder being used? I have to say I thought Cal was saying wear a good bra and stop binding...
I thought it was a very nuanced consideration of the relationship between Cal and Jackson. He seemed aware that his attraction to Cal was as a female and he didn't see himself as queer. So they respectfully parted.
The Head was a surprisingly sympathetic character. Not simply a baddie.

Even where Cal is showing Leila how to use a binder? I do take your point though.

Wouldn't it be a twist if the original head ends up using his own changes to help the children though?

I watched it and thought in the end they handled it all well. I loved the diversity of the characters. The show definitely makes some moral points and I was nervous about where they might go with the NB storyline but I thought Cal was a great character.

It's an interesting discussion about which classroom Cal should have gone to. I think in that scenario perhaps a more sensitive teacher would have taken them aside and had a private conversation where they could explain what the two groups were going to cover, and let Cal choose which seemed most appropriate. Given that Cal is female perhaps they would have chosen the girls' class if given a bit of freedom/space. It was the head's attitude in dealing with Cal that was off.

Re the binders - I hadn't realised that what Cal uses is a binder I just thought it was a crop top/vest of some kind! The other NB character was shown in some discomfort and obviously unhappy with the bandages, so when I saw it I thought oh good, they're letting these kids have their identity without idealising it.

The vulva cupcakes and the vulva wall were fantastic.I really like the line about not just wearing a badge to show your support if something but to show your support through your actions. So many great points raised and issues addressed. The binding girl-I can't recall her name, sorry, was interesting in how she didn't want to be pulled into Cal's blatant disregard of the rules just because she was non-binary too. The way Hope handled that too in saying look at so-and-so and see how you can be non/binary and express your individuality without flouting the rules. Nb girl wanted to be invisible, cal wanted to make a big stand.

Nb girl wanted to be invisible, cal wanted to make a big stand

Except they didn't. When given the chance to go about things the right way and do something that might benefit others they turned the chance down. To start at least.

They were very much an example of almost wanting the drama.

I thought it was sensitively done and didn’t judge. The illogic nature of Cal’s requirement that Jackson must identify as “queer” in order to date them (and essentially see Cal’s female body as neither male or female) showed how quite illogical and unreasonable Cal’s demands were, IMO. Jackson seemed very grounded. I think it was handled pretty well overall.

@Whatwouldscullydo

Nb girl wanted to be invisible, cal wanted to make a big stand

Except they didn't. When given the chance to go about things the right way and do something that might benefit others they turned the chance down. To start at least.

They were very much an example of almost wanting the drama.

You're absolutely right. And it just occurred to me that is a very realistic way for teenagers to behave so well done to the program for noticing that.

Also, not relevant, but @Whatwouldscullydo, I love your username.

Just googled Jackson and Cal to see if there was a thread on here - knew there would be!

I agree, the head teacher came across so poorly that her ‘GC’ remarks about the sex Ed class we’re supposed to be part of her intolerance and backward methods (eg the signs round their necks and locking Cal in the room).

FWIW I agreed with her that amongst all the smart uniforms Cal’s oversized clothes and trainers looked scruffy and out of place. They wouldn’t get away with that at my DCs’ school. By all means wear the boys uniform but FFS get one that fits! I thought the way Jackson handled it was perfect, he wasn’t going to compromise his own identity as a straight man to indulge Cal’s.

Appreciate that the breast binding scene showed the damage done with bruising and marking, but it was so sad to see a girl so upset with her own natural body that she was trying to prevent it from growing up. I feel so sad for young girls today. We all had our insecurities and body issues but to have this as an option is terrifying.

I didn't see it as Jackson not being able willing to identify as Queer. He initially freaked out at it, when Cal mentioned the relationship being Queer. Then he asked his Mum whether she'd always known she was a lesbian, and concluded 'so it was about the person', suggesting that he too could accept being Queer, if it was to be with Cal. Then when he saw Cal he apologised for freaking out and said he was open to learning - ie he was willing for the relationship to be Queer. But it was Cal who then said that she couldn't be in a relationship with him, because he still saw her as a girl.

It fits in with the theme running through the series of not being with someone if you can't give them your whole heart, and accept their whole self.

I think the whole NB thing was fairly well done actually, although I did find myself tsk-ing at kids today with their daft ideas

For the binder, they were very clearly using that scene as a teaching opportunity (Cal tells the girl don't go down a size, and don't wear two). Apparently, they chose to very actively push useful Sex Ed information in this series, which I found a bit clunky (the Sex clinic info was similarly heavy-handedly educational) but worth doing if it helps some kids. Going full-on with all the negatives of binders would probably alienate those kids who they hoped would benefit from the advice.

I was surprised to see the portrayal of Cal and the other NB person being praised on Twitter by the GI mob.

If I were teamNB then I would be very pissed off to have those characters representing my community because actually Cal is one of the most dull pupils at the school. I couldn't understand what Jackson saw in them. As far as I can remember Cal doesn't actually have any talent of note and doesn't apply themselves to any work or learning new skills like the other characters. Cal just spends their time chilling and smoking and doesn't really achieve anything. If they were written out of the script next series, I don't think anyone would miss them.

I think they skateboard?

Just seen a series 4 is in production and it's expected that there will be 2 trans characters in it as there's been a casting call for them.

There was nuance in the portrayal of Cal and Jackson's relationship but still, in the end, Cal's character was used to promote the use of binders, suggesting that they are safe whereas binding with bandages is not. Which is just bollocks. Binders / chest compression is damaging.

I have low expectations for the new season, which is a shame as I've enjoyed it overall.

The new trans characters are described as "the ultimate power couple". Sounds like they're really going all-in to promote this stuff to teenagers, aren't they.

DH watches it but I haven’t. I saw one 5 min clip where a boy and girl were lying on a bed together & she says something like ‘if you’re with me it means you’re queer/gay’ (I forget which). I said to DH this is absolute nonsense and he agreed. I’d hate for my own child to be gaslit like that.

@AgathaMystery

DH watches it but I haven’t. I saw one 5 min clip where a boy and girl were lying on a bed together & she says something like ‘if you’re with me it means you’re queer/gay’ (I forget which). I said to DH this is absolute nonsense and he agreed. I’d hate for my own child to be gaslit like that.

The thing is, that clip's from season 3. There are zero gender identity storylines in seasons one or two IIRC, so it's not the writer's main topic at all.

It's a great show, I recommend it. The characters are 3 dimensional, likeable, lots of great female characters, and the show has a lot of nuance in general.

The non-binary relationship storyline is season 3 is what started this thread - and the way it plays out after the scene you mention is that the boy decides he's not queer, but still obviously really wants to be with the girl. She (or, "they") turn him down. They decide to still be friends. No one is vilified.

A show that was entirely about promoting gender ideology would probably have had the boy come to terms with his "queer identity" and date her. (Although, tbf, it's still possible this may happen in season 3. It is a show where storylines develop over time, it's not all tied up neatly by the end of the episode).

I suspect the writers have come under a lot of pressure to include trans chacters, seeing as it's all about sex and sexuality but hasn't mentions trans at all - it's been all about straight and LGB kids until two NB characters popped up in season 3.
(Lots of strong LGB storylines throughout, incidentally).

However, Netflix has been supportive of dissenting voices (refusing to budge on the Dave Chapelle issue) so perhaps the writers will be afforded the space to explore this issue honestly. Whether they take that opportunity - or have any real idea about trans issues - I have no idea.

So, it'll be interesting to see how they deal with it.

As I said, I have low expectations. But a small hope that I'll be proved wrong!

@IvyTwines

The new trans characters are described as "the ultimate power couple". Sounds like they're really going all-in to promote this stuff to teenagers, aren't they.

They could be a "power couple" and be total arseholes!