Women's Aid and Edinburgh Rape Crisis

[Igmum]

I have just sent this email to Farah Nazeer, the CEO of Women's Aid, Sarah Hill, its Head of Trustees and the general email address. I want to support single sex services for women and children in need. Is there anything we can do collectively and constructively to support single sex shelters and provision?

I am a long term supporter of Women’s Aid and a survivor of domestic abuse. I was fortunate. I work in a professional job and earn a good salary. I have a house and was able to pay to access other forms of support. I made use of the Women’s Aid telephone helpline and legal advice line, both of which I very much appreciated, but other than that I was able to pay for support, I had housing and I suffered few financial difficulties. I am deeply aware that not everyone is as privileged as I was and, over the years, I have made a point of supporting Women’s Aid both through regular monthly giving and occasional one-off contributions.

It is in the light of this that I now write to you to express my deep concern at Mridul Wadhwa’s comments and the actions of Scottish Women’s Aid. When my daughter was four she was sexually assaulted by her father. At that time, and for some years afterwards, she could not bear to be alone in a room with a male-bodied person. She could not have a male form teacher in school. She could not bear to be left alone in a room with the headmaster. She was fearful of friends’ husbands and fathers. Fearful to the point of hysteria. If we had been in a position where we had had to seek refuge she would not have been able to share a shelter, or accept support services, from male-bodied people, however kind, innocent or well-intentioned they might be. Her fears were not a result of the actions of her teachers, her headmaster or our friends. They were the product of her experience of assault at her father’s hands. I am sure that she is not the only client you will have had in this position. It is both vital and legal for women and children to be able to access single sex provision without judgement and with support.

Yet Rape Crisis Scotland sees this as an opportunity to “re-educate” victims.

I hope I do not need to tell you how inappropriate, nor how counter to victim-centred support this is.

I cannot, with any integrity, agree to my donations being used to support Rape Crisis Scotland in this political campaign. If Ms Wadhwa wishes to campaign on particular issues she is naturally free to do so. But I cannot support rape crisis centres’ practice being changed in ways that may further the trauma that already damaged women and children experience.

I do not know if Rape Crisis Edinburgh is one of your shelters. If it is I urge you to restore victim-centred, single sex provision. If you cannot do this, and are unable to help Edinburgh survivors, I would ask you whether it is possible to restrict my donations to shelters and support that are single sex and victim-centred. If this is no longer a service you provide, I would be grateful if you could let me know which charities do. There are many, many survivors out there who desperately need this provision and I would like to support them.

Very good email. I'm writing similarly to my MP.

Four points I will be particularly drawing out:

• The re educating bit has not arisen from any research, care or benefit of the female people to be re educated: the purpose of it is solely to enable a political agenda of male people being in female spaces. This is about victim blaming and male centric top down policy, it is anything but person centred, ethical care.

• The re educating is being explained and justified by someone who as a TW has a personal, vested interest in achieving this 're education' successfully. That is even less ethical.

• The 're educating' is intended to fix in the minds of raped women a controversial political belief. The belief that biology is real and that women may objectively perceive a male person as male regardless of the male person's subjective identity, is not controversial at all and has recently been established in court as not illegal or unworthy of respect. This is enforced political and quasi-religious belief, no different to enforcing that a woman must participate in prayers and mass and profess a faith she does not hold in order to not be treated as a sinner and experience harassment and shaming as a part of her treatment. In order to benefit male people, not her.

• It would be perfectly possible to provide a range of women's shelters, some of which are designated mixed sex for female people, TW and all other possible identities, and some of which are designated as female only. This would ensure actual inclusion of all nine protected characteristics and all women, instead of excluding some female people from women's services or making the services inaccessible for them to benefit male people who would prefer an alternative to male services. Shall we face up to the reason that this is not being done?

Clue: it has nothing whatever to do with the feelings, needs, best interests and rights of female people.

Thanks Artichoke those are great points. Might write to my MP as well but I don't hold out much hope there (Labour, male 😕)

Great letter. to you and your dd.

RCC is not a shelter, they provide ' free and confidential emotional and practical support, information and advocacy to women, all members of the trans community, non-binary people and young people aged 12-18'

www.ercc.scot/who-we-support-and-our-services/

(note the order: LGBTI top of the list, women further down, and even then, it means mixed-sex)

Edinburgh Rape Crisis and Scottish Women’s Aid are separate organisations.