"Gender is something we all have and we all identify with,......

[Thingybob]

but it's also something that, for most of us - was given to us by someone else"

Says a quote on Twitter from a Mermaids mum who recently gave a Tedx talk.

No we don't all have gender, or a gender identity. I don't and nor did over 90% of the respondents in a recent poll on AIBU. As for the "given to us by someone else", I agree there are those who had gender roles and stereotypes imposed on them, usually as young children and normally by close family members but that isn't something that GC women endorse. We aren't the ones laughing at a young boy with long hair or wearing pink. In fact I would say this is what brave and stunning look like.

www.thesun.co.uk/tvandshowbiz/12964324/emma-willis-rare-photo-ace-matt/

I've purposely not linked to the Tedx talk (it's easy to find if you want to) as I don't want to instigate a pile on on someone I see as a victim of this ridiculous nonsense but I have to challenge what they are say to prevent us having many more victims.

I agree that society gives you a gender, to some extent, whether you like it or not.
I don't believe that this is the same thing as "a gender identity" which is a personal thing, some may have very strongly, others like me don't have at all, as far as i can make out (despite asking lots of people, no one has yet told me how I find out what my gender identity is).

Its pretty much the same as starting a discussion with 'We all have a soul'

Gender isn't making that boy choose the clothes he does - he is simply a boy who wears clothes he chooses and, thankfully, parents who dont appear to to read more into it.

@JustTurtlesAllTheWayDown

Its pretty much the same as starting a discussion with 'We all have a soul'

yes but without that underlying premise the whole ideology falls down.

I do not identify with gender, I have gender forced on me through sexist stereotypes

why is it so hard to understand that lots of people simply dont believe gender identity is a thing

Dear Mermaids Mum,

I don't have a gender.

I believe gender is imposed on us all, that's true - it is the means of oppressing us under a hierarchical system where males are superior to females.

I don't believe in a gender identity, and I don't and won't be forced to worship your god.

HTH

I have a gender as much as I resist it. My sex is female. From birth, I was taught that I was secondary to me, that men are more important, that my role is to be pretty and care for men, that I must defer to others, play with dolls, keep my knees together, not shout like the boys, put others first, watch my podgy belly and care for people's feelings. I must not be smart or fast or loud. These are for boys. This gender is feminine and it is a gender still foisted on girls today. As much as I try to resit it it still colours who I am because if I put myself first or am loud, opinionated or have hairy legs or sit awkwardly then I am pulled into line. My gender is feminine - but I fucking didn't choose it.

How do I know if I have a gender when no-one can define the word gender? What is it? Tell me that first and then I'll tell you if I have one.

Yes, gender is a prison and we're all in it. Why that is a point for celebration, I don't know. Smash the fucking thing up. It hurts us all, but women especially.

Thanks for coming to my TED talk.

I don't identify with people's expectations of me.

Gender is something we all have imposed on us, and we all choose (whether consciously or not) to adhere or to rebel in small or big ways. We do not all identify with it. Knowing what sex you are and the gender assumptions that go with that does not equal identification.

Just as an aside, I saw a comparative survey the other day amongst Americans.
In the 1950's in the McCarthy period, 12% when asked said they didn't feel free to voice a true opinion for fear of dire consequences.
The same question today has just returned an answer of 40% in fear.

Interesting about that survey! It could, of course, be the case that small numbers in the McCarthy era demonstrated the success of that society in generating conformity - and 40% is actually success because it shows we are now thinking for ourselves.

In the McCarthy era there was an emphasis on education for conformity and a real fear of social unrest. A lot of the political and sociological literature, for example, was geared towards promoting conformity and/or understanding 'devience' in order to fix it.