Trying to buy a computer as a woman!

[Greendoonan]

Feeling somewhat miffed about my experience with buying a new computer over the phone today. I decided to buy a custom built pc for working at home, so I phoned customer services to chat about the best specification.

Within the first five minutes the male customer services rep had complained that my home schooled DC were making too much noise, sounded very impatient and asked if I could go into another room while we talked. He then ignored me asking about the “Titan model” which was a professional workstation on their website, and instead he said he was putting together a custom quote for me. He told me how great this computer would be for kids to play games, even though I’d specifically said it was for work. He didn’t explain any of the components he was including or ask my opinion on them. He then recommended an additional warranty in case one of the kids spills a drink on it, and didn’t seem to register that I was annoyed when I responded that it isn’t for children to play with, it’s a work pc. Finally when I asked about the best monitors for animation work he said just get a cheap one from Amazon. Erm you sell monitors and I want to discuss how the frame rate and resolution will affect my workflow!

He emailed me the specification, which cost £500 less than the Titan model and didn’t have particularly powerful components. It was in a “mini” pc case that was half the size of the Titan and included a “micro-ATX” motherboard which is typically used in budget gaming computers. Then he said the quote is valid for 7 days if you want to discuss it and get back to me. Why would I need to discuss it - I make my own buying decisions and I’m paying for it!

The whole experience has just left a nasty taste in my mouth and reminded me how I’m seen by men in a professional context. Lots of people in high powered jobs are WFH right now; just because I’m looking after kids doesn’t mean I’m not a professional or that the computer will be played with by kids. The computer he quoted for was significantly smaller and underpowered compared to what I called to enquire about. My opinion wasn’t sought on the components included, he just picked them for me with no explanation. I wasn’t even worthy of being sold a monitor because he was already sick of talking to me. And it’s telling that he said “discuss” the quote instead of “consider” - as if I need input from someone else.

The (male) colleague who recommended this company was taken aback when I told him about my experience. Apparently when he bought his computer he had an in-depth discussion with them about how many CPU cores his software would utilise, whether a ray tracing graphics card would be beneficial for his work, which speed of RAM to select, etc. I said perhaps that’s because you have a penis and no children?

DH is going to call them tomorrow to see if they treat him differently, despite him knowing fuck all about computers compared to me.

I buy all the PCs and tech here, I have personally not encountered this.

my home schooled DC were making too much noise, sounded very impatient and asked if I could go into another room
Your children were obviously being very loud, and he probably couldn't hear you clearly, I would imagine that had more to do with his attitude than you being a woman

@Greendoonan

I know exactly what you mean because dd had this last week with the computer sales guy. She knew more than him, didn't stop him telling her she didn't need x and y. She doesn't even sound young on the phone so it wasn't that. It seems they don't expect women to want to spend on higher end computers

What a prat. I would send an email to the management at the company telling them that you won't be dealing with them due to this experience. I refuse to give anyone my money if they can't respect them.
I've built PCs for home and work, specify hardware/performance for commercial units, and spend far too much time with software engineers but in a shop they find it impossible to talk to me about what I want, only dh - who tells them its my thing and wanders off
My current car isn't a 'stereotypical female' one, and I'd set up a test drive via a very helpful guy at the dealership who was off sick the day I actually went to drive it. The other sales guy was totally incapable of actually addressing me, tried to give the keys to DH, patronising etc - and when the original bloke phoned me, I told him that it was only that he had been helpful that I wasn't going straight to another dealership, and his colleague had also given me incorrect information

I'd email the most senior person I could get an address for and describe your experience.

Leave a detailed review on Google.

And spend your money elsewhere.

I wouldn't both wasting my or dh's time phoning them up again. Sexism is so boring.

I'd forward his quote to the company's CEO, with a one paragraph note detailing what you did want and why, and how you had explained this to the salesman, who then tried to sell you an entirely different machine for your children to use for gaming. Tell the CEO his salesman is a patronising, incompetent, sexist git, and that's why you're taking your custom elsewhere.

Then take your custom elsewhere.

Don't waste time getting your husband to call. You already know the salesman is a sexist git. You don't need to prove it "beyond reasonable doubt."

Don't involve the DH that plays right into his hands.

Email a complaint about the shocking sexist service and leave a review on the website ir Trust pilot or something

Urgh this drives me mad.

I've experienced this so many times too. I remember trying to sort the internet out for my dad, the router had clearly stopped working, I'd done all the troubleshooting and could see the only fix was replacing the router. So he called his ISP and instantly said to them that there was no point talking to him, he's rubbish with computers and that they should speak to me as I know what I'm doing. So I get on the phone and explain all the steps I've been through and why I think the router needs replacing. The guy on the other end refused to believe that I've done any troubleshooting at all, and keeps telling me to do something I've already done, insisting it will fix it, I point out I've already tried that but try it again while I'm on the phone. When that doesn't work the guy tells me I should put my dad back on the phone, in that sing song voice you use with small children, then refuses to engage with me any more. So my dad ends up having to do the same thing I did, now for the third time, at which point the idiot on the phone decides that actually the router does need replacing after all.

Try a site like chillblast.com

You can choose from pre-configured builds and customise individual components on the website. No human interaction needed.

I’d complain too. He made assumptions, he didn’t listen to you, and he was sexist.

Not tech related really, but I had a similar experience with an electrician. If it’s one comment, you convince yourself you’re imagining it, but when it goes on and on you know you’re not.

I don’t agree with just taking your custom elsewhere. Sexist men like that need to have it drawn to their attention else they’ll carry on patronising every woman who phones them.

It's the same with cars. A sales person asked me which engine my car had, then told me I was wrong and that it was more likely to have a different engine. Wouldn't listen to me that I knew which engine. Looked up my car and found I was right! And that was a woman! I even used to work in the dealership so I certainly knew the cars - she knew this. Arsehole

I would review them or email them highlighting the dreadful customer service, not necessarily pointing out that you’re female.

I worked in tech but always dress vaguely boho to visit electronics retailers for my own amusement. Apple don’t fall for it but most do.

Well I spoke to a different computer company this morning and had a totally different experience. The guy was very nice and when DC made a noise he said do you need to take a minute to settle your little one, I’m happy to wait. He helped me customise the actual pc I was interested in, and he explained the difference in performance between the component options and helped me choose the best ones for my needs. In fact he actually convinced me to spend more by explaining the benefits I’d see from a small extra investment. He included monitors etc even though it took longer. Then he asked if I wanted to discuss anything else or if I was happy to proceed. Maybe he was just a better salesman... I’d like to think that not every man at the first company is like the guy I spoke to yesterday.

Some men are sexist gits, others aren't. Glad you found one of the latter.

@Fucket

I think part of it is perhaps women can be a little too polite (I’m not saying OP is) but I’ve noticed that sales people will hone in on polite and gentle folk who will listen to a sales pitch. My father is of this variety, the can’t say ‘no’ type. But it’s mainly women who have been conditioned to be like this.

When I deal with sales people mainly men if they start trying to go down the sales pitch route via gender stereotyping I pull them up on it. I may say to them, “what are you doing? I’m not interested in ‘y’ I want ‘x’, stop wasting my time, if you don’t stop it I will find another company or person who does want my commission.”

I wouldn’t get your DH to call them back, practice being assertive and phone back and explain what you do want and get someone else to help instead. Don’t let them fob you off. Be prepared to make a written complaint if necessary.

This ^^

I think we have to be quick to shut any spiel down that is wasting our time on products we have no interest in. OP must have been aware salesman was leading her down a path she had no interest in. Also, a lot of sales staff are pretty poor and just revert to the sterotypes of customer they are taught want certain products even when the consumer is telling them out right we dont. Correct them as soon as it becomes obvious this is wasting your time.
They'll soon learn.

When I walk into my local Game, they always offer to help me locate what I'm after as if I couldn't do what the boys and men do and see that each console has a big sign and is colour coded (Xbox= green, PS= blue) as I get older it's even worse- they always assume that I'm buying for a husband or son when I've owned games consoles since 1984.

I suspect that if your h orders they won't assume that he wants the small cute case and the under powered components because he's a man and will want the fastest and biggest.

I overheard a female colleague talking about buying a tv at the weekend and one of the men said "Your husband let you pick the family tv?" as if a woman couldn't have an opinion on what tv and spec to go for.

@WhipperSnapperSteve

Go to www.overclockers.co.uk , they will treat you decently as a woman when you call them.

Glad you found another company to order the PC. Just wanted to recommend second this for anyone else looking for a good company have used them for over 10 years to buy components for my pcs.

I suspect that if your h orders they won't assume that he wants the small cute case and the under powered components because he's a man and will want the fastest and biggest
This is my problem with the whole thing. I called to ask about customising the Titan, I didn’t ask him to spec a whole new pc from scratch. Tbh until the email quote arrived (after I’d put down the phone) I didn’t even know he’d chosen a mini pc case and a micro-ATX board.

@ErrolTheDragon no I didn’t miss that part, what makes you think that? OP had a conversation over the phone, and her colleague went in store. No one (including OP) has no idea how the two conversations went, and what prompted the sales person to behave differently to the two customers. It’s extremely unlikely that it was because OP is female and her colleague is male, but perhaps more what questions were asked. Also, the sales reps could have been two different people, so again unlikely that the female OP was being singled out, but more that two sales reps just have two different approaches. If OP had had her colleagues rep, she might have had a much better experience. Nothing to do with her being female.

@PotholeParadies salesman sell what they want to make the most commission on and what they’re being targeted on that month. It’s often irrelevant what the price of the product is

I’m not saying the sales person OP dealt with handled her query well, but what I’m saying is that you absolutely cannot say that OP was treated differently because she was a woman.

1. Her colleague may have exhibited a better understanding of the products on sale or presented their requirements in a way which gave him a “better experience”.

1. Her sales person was just a bad sales person, and had she had her colleagues sales person, her experience would be much better

A better test would be if OP had emailed the company masquerading as a man, and then walking in the store, clearly as a woman, and having the same conversation with the same sales person, and then seeing how they were treated differently.

Wish I had seen this thread earlier!

My suggestion would have been get your DH to make the same call. Compare outcome. If he got better treatment, ie actually responding to the request of the customer, then definitely email HQ of company. And if they have the option make a comment on their web site.

And at a time when so many are working from home and also home school what a really stupid reaction to there being noise. Dealt with professionally might even have sold a high spec work computer and by being understanding about home schooling etc., done a deal on a lower spec for child/ren.

And yes, the reaction was because the caller was a woman. I bet if it had been a man and a child made a noise in the background it would have been a comment of sympathy, and a suggestion of was there a good time to call back.

It is because of twat like this that years ago I gave up ordering computer equipment over the phone where you can put together the components you want. So much less hassle.

But on a similar problem please can someone tell me how to get anyone in a mobile phone shop to even stop and talk to you. Am less confident shopping online for these (partly because I'm not that interested I haven't ever really bothered fully investigating) but have had the most terrible experience in a range of shops. But in this instance not sure if it is because I am a woman, but because I am an old woman. I once stood in a shop for nearly twenty minutes with all the staff studiously walking round me!!!

Sorry missed out "and always go online" from - It is because of twat like this that years ago I gave up ordering computer equipment over the phone 2 ... " where you can put together the components you want. So much less hassle.

OP hope your new equipment lives up to expectations!

You can only make a true test if you get the same man on the phone and you try to get the kids to make a noise in the background again. This rep seemed to have an issue with his listening skills. Also, if they outsource to a typical call centre, then don't expect a plethora of like minded individuals. My own experience working in this sort of environmemt is that they attract a certain type of person which are not going to be on board with what you expect in open-mindedness.

OP had a conversation over the phone, and her colleague went in store
I never said that. There is no store - that’s not how these custom pc companies work. My colleague phoned up the same as I did. He may have got a different sales person.

I do think the reaction was because I’m female though. Typically when DC make a noise when I’m on the phone, my colleagues are frustrated but understanding. DH’s female colleagues are understanding too, however his male colleagues will say something like can your wife not keep them quiet, why is your wife not looking after them? Erm because she’s working as well? I’ve never experienced so much sexism since I had kids.

I'm in the tech industry and I'm not surprised unfortunately.

Ditto. Glad the second person listened. I'd probably be sending feedback on the first guy, possibly with a women in tech rant, or if I were in a kinder mood, a suggestion he gets dome training in active listening. Not that I'd expect it to actually make any difference.

Getting the vibe that some of them responses on this thread have come from exactly the same kind of sexist, condescending arsehole that took that first phone call. Glad you got it sorted, OP! I hope you complain.