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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

School closures: Thousands of women have just had their double shift doubled

181 replies

Carefulvulvadriver · 30/12/2020 19:55

What should the feminist response to the above be? Yes yes, of course fathers should do their share of the home school and childcare, but we know many dont and wont, and that still leaves a problem for single mothers like me.
This afternoon the government has announced that 100s of primary schools across the country will not reopen as planned in January. I suspect many more will be added to the list over the next week or so.
We know that will leave 1000s of women once again having to juggle work, childcare and home school. They will feel the stress and hit to their mental health of trying to do that. They will miss out on promotions, pay rises and opportunities as a result. They will have to cancel study plans. Many will work until 3am each morning as the only chance they will have to work will be after the kids have gone to bed. And as ever, it will be the poorest women who will be the worst hit, as will their kids. Some men will suffer from this too, but it will disproportionately hit women.

How should feminists respond? Surely this IS a feminist issue - it's about how social policy and our economic way of life has not been designed with women in mind. The woman stuff - the looking after children and educating them - is somehow to be tagged on as an after thought; the work and time to be magic-ed out of thin air, as it's only the man stuff that counts or is important.

In my view we should be demanding paid parenting leave, funded by the government. I think we should also be putting pressure on the government to confirm it will run "catch up" schools in the summer holidays for the kids who have missed out on education (there will be a problem getting the staffing, although I wonder if TAs might be available as I know that in some cases they are on zero hour contracts and so not paid in the holidays).

What else? Any one got any ideas? And what if we dont get it? Will we just do what so many of us did back in spring (me included) and just suck it up? I love my job, I'm lucky that it's really fulfilling, but isnt it time we refused to do the impossible?

OP posts:
IfNotNow12 · 31/12/2020 15:27

I would suppport a use it or lose it Scandi style parental leave system.
The whole child support thing really needs turning on it's head as well.
Currently, if a man fathers a couple of children, and then leaves and shacks up with another woman who has children and/or fathers a few more, he stops being responsible for the first children (or, at least most men do based on the amount the law is allowed to take from them.)
I personally know a few women whose children's fathers live with another woman's children, and he is then responsible for the new children (whose father does actually pay child support) but not for his biological kids. Every human being should be legally financially responsible for the small humans they create, no matter what they choose to then go on and do. Men just get away with absolving themselves of all responsibility. The number of men paying nothing at all for their children's upkeep is shocking.(I say men because in almost all cases the children stay with the mother.)

Femin1st · 31/12/2020 15:48

@CaraDuneRedux thank you, I did not know that rule! I will post in the relevant thread as soon as it is live, although the parliament website warns there could be a delay of several weeks due to there being so many petitions right now

Grellbunt · 31/12/2020 15:54

@IfNotNow12

I would suppport a use it or lose it Scandi style parental leave system. The whole child support thing really needs turning on it's head as well. Currently, if a man fathers a couple of children, and then leaves and shacks up with another woman who has children and/or fathers a few more, he stops being responsible for the first children (or, at least most men do based on the amount the law is allowed to take from them.) I personally know a few women whose children's fathers live with another woman's children, and he is then responsible for the new children (whose father does actually pay child support) but not for his biological kids. Every human being should be legally financially responsible for the small humans they create, no matter what they choose to then go on and do. Men just get away with absolving themselves of all responsibility. The number of men paying nothing at all for their children's upkeep is shocking.(I say men because in almost all cases the children stay with the mother.)
This is what I was trying to get at.
ByersRd · 31/12/2020 16:10

The problem as I see it though that even when employers do have genuine flexible working policies it tends to be women who take advantage of them rather than men, furthering the gap between women's presence and men's and reinforcing the idea that women are lesser employees

Absolutely, but raising the profile of arrangements for both men and women has to be a starting point. At least if business is supporting this, it gives families a conversation to be had.

I know in school we always have a conversation about 'yes you can access parental unpaid leave, which days are you covering, which is your partner?' It has to be expected.

Also totally agree with turning support upside down. My own exH had an allowance for one child that wasn't his which was greater than the amount the CS expected for his own two children, yet the other child had two full time working parents of his own. Mine were left with the scraps he gave and my part time wage as I tried to manage a house, family and job. Anyway I digress!

HappyPumpkin81 · 31/12/2020 17:55

@Femin1st Thank you for starting the petition. I occasionally dream about standing for parliament but I'm too scared to actually do it!

HecatesCats · 31/12/2020 19:10

Yes, thanks Femin1st - I'll happily sign the petition.

NeurotreeWenceslas · 31/12/2020 19:21

It is a feminist issue.

And I'm a teacher.

Last time my toddler was sent home to SI they said we could be furloughed, except teachers can't be.

I'm still completing the work I was set during that period as I simply couldn't do it all.

Women's care should be recognised as work and paid accordingly, unfortunately capitalism is built on women's unpaid work.

(And communism is too.)

ArabellaScott · 31/12/2020 19:50

There's a heartbreaking thread on AIBU from a woman who can no longer provide childcare for her stepdaughter. One or the other of them will lose their job, by the sound of it.

This is also putting terrible strain on families.

ChangeyNameyTimey · 31/12/2020 20:12

I suppose the most effective way to manage the problem of children being at home is to massively drop the expectations for learning and have schools set “keep busy” tasks which do not require any support or supervision. It seems to be impossible to have effective education for primary school children without massive parental input so I can’t see another solution. Children growing up in war zones or during other disasters catch up when their lives settle down again and I assume that will be even more straight forward when it’s a global issue. It’s not a very popular suggestion though!

Levirandal · 31/12/2020 20:46

I have never felt more resentful towards my dh than during the first lockdown. He literally shut himself in his office whilst I tried to balance a 20 hour a week (sometimes more job) and home school our kids aged between 12 and 7. Two of the kids have Sen (1 has a ft 1:1 and the other attends a specialist school). He was absolutely no help. Ironically my part time job is much busier and stressful than his. His logic was as the significantly higher earner he had to work his usual hours leaving me to work between home schooling the kids.

It’s a hugely feminist issue. As women on the whole are picking up the slack. The people in power don’t want stuff to change as they’re mainly men and they benefit from women picking up everything.

HecatesCats · 31/12/2020 20:57

@ChangeyNameyTimey

I suppose the most effective way to manage the problem of children being at home is to massively drop the expectations for learning and have schools set “keep busy” tasks which do not require any support or supervision. It seems to be impossible to have effective education for primary school children without massive parental input so I can’t see another solution. Children growing up in war zones or during other disasters catch up when their lives settle down again and I assume that will be even more straight forward when it’s a global issue. It’s not a very popular suggestion though!
I guess part of the problem is that you're creating a hugely disadvantaged cohort, particularly in crucial years and that will have the biggest impact on those from disadvantaged backgrounds who can't afford catch up support. We know that those who can afford it will pay to help their kids catch up.
NeurotreeWenceslas · 31/12/2020 21:06

@ChangeyNameyTimey

I suppose the most effective way to manage the problem of children being at home is to massively drop the expectations for learning and have schools set “keep busy” tasks which do not require any support or supervision. It seems to be impossible to have effective education for primary school children without massive parental input so I can’t see another solution. Children growing up in war zones or during other disasters catch up when their lives settle down again and I assume that will be even more straight forward when it’s a global issue. It’s not a very popular suggestion though!

Yes. Not popular though.

When people say "behind" - behind what? The tories dropped many objectives in lit and num down a year from where they were in Labour. Shift them back up and there's no "behind." Kids in some countries don't start to learn to read till 7.

It's only worth setting home work for children who can work independently.

Until you're upper secondary all you can really do is complete structured tasks; practising prior learning. It's not real new Learning. Some new learning can come from tv etc.

From research I saw on NZ Earth quakes, Maths trends to be the area that's "lost" so practising known skills is worth it and relatively easy to do. Eg tables, exercises, online games.

Reading is easily done; ime kids don't write as well at home as they do at school.

But all the above is pointless as so many children hate working at home.

I couldn't get my son to read much and he wouldn't let me read any stories. Refused to write a thing. My gut said unschooling was fine and I went with that. He knows so much about history now as he binge watched HH.

Somehow his reading skills have come on this year to fluent independence 🤷🏻‍♀️

NeurotreeWenceslas · 31/12/2020 21:11

have the biggest impact on those from disadvantaged backgrounds who can't afford catch up support.

Do you mean secondary? That is an issue.

There were and are so many options for part time rotas.

Closures should be in extreme emergency circumstances too.

I'm Furious schools haven't been supported better. I'm also furious about how cramped U.K. classes are compared to many others

The feminist issue is predominantly re primary and early years.

NeurotreeWenceslas · 31/12/2020 21:11

I teach sen and that's a very different complex matter.

ValancyRedfern · 31/12/2020 21:16

I'm happy to see some teachers on here. I feel so out of place on the teacher forums at the moment as I'm against schools closing, but also out of place among the threads against schools closing as they all seem to hate teachers!! Will happily sign and share the petition once it's ready to go.

Sexnotgender · 31/12/2020 21:17

@ChangeyNameyTimey

I suppose the most effective way to manage the problem of children being at home is to massively drop the expectations for learning and have schools set “keep busy” tasks which do not require any support or supervision. It seems to be impossible to have effective education for primary school children without massive parental input so I can’t see another solution. Children growing up in war zones or during other disasters catch up when their lives settle down again and I assume that will be even more straight forward when it’s a global issue. It’s not a very popular suggestion though!
The learning isn’t necessarily the issue. I’m trying to look after a toddler, I frankly don’t give a shit if he learns anything. I’m just trying to stop him setting fire to himself or eating the dog.
HecatesCats · 31/12/2020 21:18

Do you mean secondary? That is an issue.

Yes, it's likely to widen the attainment gap at GCSE and A-Level, and will impact yr 10 & yr 12 too. But it's also a crucial time for year 6, for example. We could say let's just provide keep busy tasks, but we know that parents who can afford it will pay for catch up support and we know that private schools will try to maintain the curriculum because parents are paying - the impact will be to widen the gap between rich and poor.

NeurotreeWenceslas · 31/12/2020 21:20

That is true. The way I see it from the coal face is that the inequality is ridiculously immense already. Ridiculously.

HecatesCats · 31/12/2020 21:23

@NeurotreeWenceslas

That is true. The way I see it from the coal face is that the inequality is ridiculously immense already. Ridiculously.
It is, but the danger is that this will make it disastrously worse for a generation - if we withdraw from providing a consistent education to the most disadvantaged. The government has a responsibility to make sure that those children whose parents can't afford to add value by paying for extra support aren't disadvantaged even more.
NeurotreeWenceslas · 31/12/2020 21:25

Education has been failing many of these children for some time.

The death of sure start was the start. Stifling of creativity. Ditching the wonderful new holistic curriculum that Labour spent ages researching and was launched just before the tories got in. The tories re did literacy for primaries and then ran out of money for secondary. Some of this has been brewing for many years.

They'll blame a lot of stuff on the pandemic for many years that was actually created by them.

HecatesCats · 31/12/2020 21:27

They'll blame a lot of stuff on the pandemic for many years that was actually created by them.

I'm sure they will, but it's not an excuse not to step up support so that they don't fall even further behind.

NeurotreeWenceslas · 31/12/2020 21:28

I fully agree with you, I teach the most disadvantaged % of the most disadvantaged. I know what actual damage lockdown did.

At the same time, what can happen in a pandemic?

(I'm not clear on the details of this petition.)

Nevertoomanyroasties · 31/12/2020 21:33

The gender pay gap is the issue for us. Home school falls to me because dh earns more so making him precarious by taking time off to home school is risky for us as a family.

HecatesCats · 03/01/2021 18:01

"There is not a single woman on the government's cabinet committees on Covid 19 operations, domestic and economic strategy or economic operations"

twitter.com/sophierunning/status/1344350147292102656?s=21

SilenceIsNoLongerSuspicious · 03/01/2021 19:34

@ChangeyNameyTimey

I suppose the most effective way to manage the problem of children being at home is to massively drop the expectations for learning and have schools set “keep busy” tasks which do not require any support or supervision. It seems to be impossible to have effective education for primary school children without massive parental input so I can’t see another solution. Children growing up in war zones or during other disasters catch up when their lives settle down again and I assume that will be even more straight forward when it’s a global issue. It’s not a very popular suggestion though!
Even if schools could provide busy-work that kids could do by themselves that took them 9-3, that still leaves parents:
  • overseeing the work (printing sheets, making sure they watch the right YouTube video and not something unsuitable, making sure they’re actually doing it)
  • providing and clearing up after meals at the right times (lunch and sometimes breakfast previously done by school)
  • making sure they get fresh air and exercise (needs adult supervision for those with no gardens)
  • giving cuddles and emotional support when they’re sad and missing their friends

All these things (with the constant threat of interruption even if the DC are quiet for now) are incompatible with back-to-back zoom calls, concentrated work or pretty much anything I would normally count as work.

I agree it’s better than pressure from school to hand in lots of work. But it’s not anywhere near a solution, even in the lucky situation of two parents sharing equally and wfh.

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