Why do men follow women?

[TicTacTwo]

I was shopping in Morrison's today when somebody suddenly grabbed my arm. It was one of my teen DD's friends and she said that a man was following her. She had gone into the supermarket in the hope of losing him and his face being caught on cctv just in case.

Why do men follow women? Are they turned on by a woman being scared? Do they hope that she'll be home alone so he can assault her?

The man had disappeared by the time she found me. Presumably he assumed that I was her mum or something but I can't help feel furious that she's been made to feel terrified for the crime of walking down the street. She asked me not to tell my dd but we told her mum what had happened. I'm livid that she's embarrassed about something that's not her fault.

One thing to tell your daughters is don’t be embarrassed to make a fuss or get someone in trouble. Go with your gut instinct. If someone makes you uncomfortable you don’t have to apologise for them.

When I was 18 I was walking home from the station about 4pm but it was dark. Down my quiet suburban road no none was about other than a chap who had got off the same train. I noticed he was keeping pace with me on the other side of the road. Just before I got to my turning which was a dark cul de sac off of the main road he crossed over and stood in front of me and said ‘ hello’. Now I’m really bad at recognising people in unfamiliar settings and probably have a degree of face blindness due to several embarrassing incidents of not recognising people in later life. It crossed my mind that this might be someone I should know and I couldn’t recognise him. So I wasn’t immediately rude. But I was very uneasy. I was actually standing outside my aunts house when he accosted me. I didn’t dare go in and tell my aunt a powerful and robust east end matriarch as I envisaged her making a scene probably involving the alleged pervert being hit with a frying pan over the head but I didn’t want to walk into my road which was dark and not visible from the main road where my aunts house was on the corner.

Now I shouldn’t have been embarrassed about the fuss that I would have caused at all. I was lucky because the guy wasn’t an innocent neighbour as I thought he might be. My aunts Dalmatian dog was in the garden and came running out. I called her name and the dog clearly heard that I was scared and sensed the man was a threat and luckily for me didn’t overthink the situation . I opened the gate the dog flew at this guy snarling with hackles up and bared teeth and chased him down the road. Not sure if she got him or not because a few minutes later she came back tail wagging and wouldn’t leave me. I then did the sensible thing and told my aunt.

However older wiser and a lot more assertive a few year later I was shopping in the west end walking down a very posh street waiting for the lights to change to cross the road. A large Jag slowed and started hooting at me . I turned round yelled “who the @@@ do you think you are pervert” and made a rude gesture. It was my boss ....

Eowyn tbh I think it’s good you did that because your boss was alerted to the fact that this is scary behaviour that a lot of women and girls have to face.

When I was a teen there was a guy locally who used to follow me, to the point that I got off the bus once to avoid him, it was a 45 minute wait for the next one.

One day he turned up with a friend and it was the last straw, I stood in the street yelling at them. They never bothered me again.

Following her in hopes of having sex with her. Good thing CCTV is everywhere and smart girl for going to a very public place. Hope the police are alerted.

For the same reasons that animals track their prey

I think theres much too much hysteria here. The kind of drama on this thread is probably the reason many women 'fear' they are being followed when its prob just someone walking in the same direction.

Please, please, fear not. the chances of beiing attacked by a stranger following you are so slim they are barely worth mentioning. The UK is an extremely safe place for women and for that im thankful.

I would guess as many men are 'followed' by women too!

You get that one out of a Christmas cracker?

I was followed at the age of 15, down the street with my friends, we went into a shop and I came out on my own and he was still there. It was 4.30pm in winter so dark. He followed me back up the street, when I started to run he grabbed me and stuck his hand up my skirt. I got free and he ran off.
He could have been planning to assault her, please report to the police.

**Please, please, fear not. the chances of beiing attacked by a stranger following you are so slim they are barely worth mentioning. The UK is an extremely safe place for women and for that im thankful.

I would guess as many men are 'followed' by women too!*

As all of the posters here , including myself have been followed by strange men , in my case to expose himself and masturbate, I would say the fear is justifiable. As for your " women are just as bad point" 😂😂😂😂

Can I just add something.

One of my male friends, after a discussion about this now doesn't walk behind women (he never followed, I was saying about hearing footsteps and not knowing if it's anything to be worried about) if he finds himself behind a woman or girl he will either walk past and keep walking or cross the street.

It's such a simple thing to tell the men / boys in our lives to do.

The UK is an extremely safe place for women and for that im thankful.

Yeah only 25% of us have been sexually assaulted or raped, only 2 women a week are murdered by a partner or ex partner, honour killings never happen and no rape victim is ever victim blames.

@ickysticky

I'm so glad that the many many times in my life since I was a young teen that I've been followed, shouted at, flashed at, masturbated at, verbally abused, groped and on one occasion raped is all a figment of my imagination. Just how fucking dare you minimise the experiences of virtually all women everywhere.

Please, please, fear not. the chances of beiing attacked by a stranger following you are so slim they are barely worth mentioning

I know you mean when you are walking down the street and someone ‘happens’ to be behind you and you are trying to be reassuring

But a few women have said that they...or in my case my 12 year old daughter have been followed by a man and something horrible happened

So it is worth mentioning and its not fucking slim

The man who sexually assaulted me when I was a teenager already had a history of following girls and women, flashing and creepy behaviour. So I wouldn't minimise it at all.

It was a rotten thing to happen but on the plus side it gave me a permanent awareness of danger, a total intolerance of men's bullshit and a strong protectiveness of other women.

to all.

It happens in cars, too - I once dithered for maybe 5 seconds at a small roundabout junction, INFURIATING the prick behind me who blared his horn, then - contrary to the direction he'd been indicating - followed me off the roundabout, took two turns behind me in an exaggerated 'slewing brakes' way and tailgated me as I tried to park to drop my son at preschool. He was clearly after intimidating me because I'd angered him with my womanish driving.

My mum was, terrifyingly, followed all the way from my house nearly to hers (that's a drive of about an hour) on major and minor roads, no way it was coincidence. It was late at night. She says he'd draw up next to her at traffic lights and be looking into the car - she was too horrified to make eye contact. As she got closer to her own street (quiet residential) she was very worried he'd muscle his way into the house behind her, or know she was there on her own, so she ended up driving round the town's shopping streets and I think eventually lost him. We have no idea what his motivation was but it seemed a lot of effort for mere intimidation.

Why do men follow women?

Because they want to and they can.....

Why do men rape women?
Why do men stare at women, or holler at them from car windows, pinch their bums, call them names, intimidate them?
Why do men mansplain, even if the woman they're talking to is better informed then them?
Why are men disproportionately in positions of power and influence?
Why do men make the rules, even about women's bodies?
Why are men muscling in on the spaces we have fought for, our sports, our changing rooms?
Why do men sit around doing nothing whilst women wait on them hand foot and finger?

Because they want to and they can.....

Sheesh, I could so easily be a man hater, but luckily I have a brilliant dad as a role model and a husband who sees me as an equal.......

The UK is an extremely safe place for women and for that im thankful.

@ickysticky, what are you basing this statement on? I don’t think I know a female that couldn’t tell you of multiple stories of this level of harassment or worse. And PP has reminded you how horrifically frequent violent sexual assault and murder is. I am shocked by your comments.

@ickysticky

I think theres much too much hysteria here. The kind of drama on this thread is probably the reason many women 'fear' they are being followed when its prob just someone walking in the same direction.

Please, please, fear not. the chances of beiing attacked by a stranger following you are so slim they are barely worth mentioning. The UK is an extremely safe place for women and for that im thankful.

I would guess as many men are 'followed' by women too!

You'd guess as many men are "followed" by women too! would you, ickysticky?

How many of those do you think are raped and/ or murdered by those women?

Fuck off basically. Every single woman I know has had at least one incident where a bloke has scared her and she had to do a quick calculation of how she was going to get out of there alive. Every single one.

When men stop doing that to women, we'll stop being hysterical about it.

Deal?

I would guess as many men are 'followed' by women too!

Yes, all those women following men home at night, getting their genitals out, and putting the poor men in fear of their lives in case the predatory woman decides to use her naturally superior strength again him.

Unbelievable.

And people think women are hateful bigots for wanting to retain our single sex spaces.

I'm mid 50s and was followed around a carboot sale, of all places, last summer. The bloke kept trying to engage me in conversation, kept petting my dog. I managed to lose him at one point and quickly headed to my car. He came striding across to me grinning ear to ear. I just locked the doors and drove off.

Men's sense of entitlement to women's time and attention never ceases to amaze me.

I have been followed and physically grabbed twice. It's only being hyper aware that had put me in a good enough position to defend myself. It's not drama ffs

I'd forgotten about cars. Both myself and my sister were driven off the road by carload of young men. Fortunately for my sister, who was on a quiet country road ,her car was better and she managed to get round them and zip away. In my case I was merely forced into the hard shoulder and again I was able to race away.
It was probably our own" fault" for daring to be young and driving a nice car!!!

I’m in my 50s and was followed and verbally harassed by a group of men last week. I assume they do it because they enjoy trying to make women feel afraid.

Did anyone else find it ramped up when pregnant? When I have a visible bump I had a few men follow and ask inappropriate questions/comments.

I had a guy physically charge at me as I walked down the street- obviously pregnant. It looked like he was going to rugby tackle me. I then got a load of abuse when I shouted at him to fucking off; I'm pregnant. Apparently I couldn't take a joke and was a fucking bitch for wanting to protect myself and unborn child.